Seig: "let's continue tomorrow
I'm tired today
well good night"
I jumped in the bed covered myself and started snoring.
Emerald: "..."
Seig: "*snore*"
Emerald: " *draws blade sfx*"
Seig: " *snoring nervously* "
Emerald: " *undraws blade sfx*"
Seig: " *snoring in relief* "
(IT WORKED!!!)
That was the plan I came up with when I saw the book
Scheherazade
An ancient brave princes who married a tyrant who killed every single one of his wife's after only a single night of marriage
She survived by telling incomplete stories to him and only finishing them later
Until she spended 1000 and 1 nights with him
And because she had children with him during that time and because he became accustomed to her
She kept her life...
Hopefully her method will work for me
Well if I wake up alive tomorrow I'll know it worked for sure
...
...
...
...
It's been along day and I'm unsurprisingly tired...
.
.
The next morning
???? : "there does not seem to be blood
Do you think she choked him this time?"
??? : " doesn't matter just move his corpse to the coffin"
Seig: "Umm... Excuse me..
What are you doing"
???? And ??? : "" AAAAAAHHHHHH
GHOOOSTTT"
And just like that two random maid servants ran out of the room
Seig : "well that was weird..."
Emerald : "don't think much of it"
Seig: "AAAHHH GHOST
..
I MEAN... AAAHHH WIFE"
Emerald: " sorry that was a bad joke"
She looks at me for a moment the asks
Emerald : " the rest of the story?"
Seig: " will continue that at night"
She nods and moves out of bed and leaves the room
Well of to start a new day
It's seems like I need to live like every day will be my last...
Because they are probably are...
I walk out of the room
I'm still in my wedding suit
I better get my luggage
Female Gaurd: " Halt"
Seig: " what?"
Female Gaurd: " WHO ARE YOU AND HOW DID YOU GET HERE"
Seig: " I'm Seig"
Female Gaurd: "..."
Seig: " The Queen's Husband "
*SLAM*
Seig: " WHY AM I IN JAIL?!!"
Gaurd: " someone came to interrogate you"
Anna: " I'll take it from here"
It's that ice cold maid again...
Anna: "...."
She staring intently at me
Seig: ".....
What?"
Anna: ".. How did you...
Never mind
The Gaurd mistook you for an intruder because no one was supposed to be there
I'll release you at once"
Seig: " thanks
Do you know where my luggage are?"
Anna: " I threw them away
Sorry didn't think you'll live another day"
Seig: "....."
Anna: " I'll get you some breakfast
And a change of clothes
You can roam free around the castle as I notify everyone"
Seig: " thanks"
This was not a good first day
After I ate and got dressed I roam around the castle
But wherever I go I got strange looks
??? : "how come he's alive"
???? : " did he manage to slip away"
?? : " maybe the princess actually likes him"
??? : "are you an idiot"
And like that the day passed and I was dragged back to the bedroom
Emerald: " continue"
And here she is again with her sword
Seig: " as you wish
Snow white bit the poison apple and....
...
The witch died
....
True loves kiss...
Happily ever after..
The End
What do you think?"
Emerald: ".....
* draws blade*"
Shit did she hate it
Emerald : " Why?"
Seig: " huh?"
Emerald:" I've listened carefully to this story and I have many problems with it
For starters why did the Queen need to send Snow white away to kill her
She didn't need a hunter
Only make a command and off with her head
Why did the seven dwarfs help snow white
Why didn't snow white use her position as a crown princess to rally the people and fight against the Queen
Or why didn't she use her charms to have the prince kill the queen for her
And why would the prince even kiss a random corpse in the woods"
SERIOUSLY THAT'S WHAT'S BOTHERING YOU
Seig: " ehem ehem
Well the answer to the first question although she was the queen all the knights and high ranking nobles in her palace were loyal to her dead husband, if she asked someone to kill his daughter it would have started a civil war.
To answer the second question
The dwarfs were a bunch of older uncles who took pity on her
The third and fourth question
S iw white was a sheltered girl
She didn't even consider to declare war or seduce someone
As for the last question....
Well the prince was a horny bastard hehe... "
Emerald :".... "
Seig:" * sweets nervously* "
Emerald:" so she was a fool who knew nothing of the world, got saved by others pity
Then spend the rest of her life being made into a trophy wife and a sex toy for her husband"
Seig: "I mean you can look at it like that but-"
Emerald: " that's the only way to look at it..
Not that I blame her..
No one taught her anything
She was just a jewelry piece for show
She was born like that and lived like that for the rest of her life"
Seig: "well yes...
But it's not like everyone can be like Mulan"
Emerald: " who's Mulan?"
(and the fish took the bait)
Seig: " well let's get down to business
It was long ago
In ancient china
Mulan was...
..
Be a man...
Musho...
...
The Hun attack..."
Emerald: " then what?"
Seig: " Then...
Lets continue the story tomorrow
I'm tired"
Emerald: " *eyes widen*"
Her eyes widen and after a minute of silence she gives a sly smile
Emerald: " so that's your plan"
She chuckles a little
Emerald: " Alright I'll admit it
I fell for it yesterday
But why would you think that I'll keep falling for it-"
Seig: " *snores*"
Emerald: "....."
( my plan got discovered quickly but that doesn't mean I'll give up)
*kick*
Seig: " OWWWW WHAT WAS THAT FOR "
Emerald :" This is my bed
Go sleep on the couch "
Seig:" what couch"
She points in a direction
Seig: " that wasn't there yesterday?"
Emerald : " I had it prepared"
Seig " couldn't you prepare a bed at least for your husband"
Emerald: " *snores*"
Chapter End