CHAPTER 18: Numpty Men
Ace's POV:
The woman spoke something again but I didn't hear it. I couldn't. There was a ringing in my ear, a really annoying one. I don't know how long but I just stood there. I didn't have the numbing feeling that cones with shock. It was painful. Really painful. I thought I'd felt pain when I heard the woman speak those words. But with every second I stood, it amplified.
I had never given much thought to the concept of death. It wasn't surreal to me but at the same time it wasn't a thing that affected me much. It was a part of life. People are born, they live, they die. That's it. This concept never intrigued me much. What intrigued me was what's after or what's before.
The first somewhat real introduction I had to the concept of death was when my great grandma died. I was sad because the only woman who gave me everything I wanted, surrendered to every one of my whims was gone. But, as shallow as it sounds, it didn't matter much. Mostly because, I already knew she was going to die and I was too young to understand that she'd never return back.
But now I knew. And that's the thing that scared me the most right now. I would never get to see her, to touch her, to hold her tight. I would never get to do the stuff we said we'd do together.
Before, even though she was not there with me physically, I knew that someday she could be. There was a possibility. There was hope. But to know, it wasn't possible at all now, it made my head spin with the pain I was feeling.
Before I knew it, I was walking down the hallway back to the waiting area. My eyes flew to the welcome sign I'd made. A flight had just arrived and people rushed to get to their loved ones. I wanted to cry. But my throat was so clogged up I couldn't even breathe. What caught my eye was thr girl running towards me. I looked up to see her. She looked oddly familiar as she stood in front of me with a small smile on her face. She had aviators on. My eyes moved down to take in her pink tank top, white skirt and cute sneakers with stars on them. My heartbeat was growing faster and faster.
"Hii!!!," She gave me a smile as she removed her aviators to reveal hazel eyes.
"Do I know you?" I asked hesitantly, my heart hoping, hoping for the impossible. I don't care. I don't care how. I don't care at this point. As long as I know it's her who's standing in front of me.
"You don't know me?" She looked at me, offended.
"I'm the stranger in the bombass aviators you've been looking for and I'm preparing myself to tackled with hugs but I don't think I'm getting one anymore," her voice was low and sweet as she pretended to look disappointed.
I was stunned. She looked exactly like I imagined she would. Her clothes, her style, her brown hair, her face. And at the same time, she wasn't. My mind wanted to believe it was her but my heart knew better. It wasn't. It was just a random stranger.
"Who are you?," I asked, and my voice almost broke.
"You're looking for a stranger. I'm here. It's actually really cute. I thought there'd be no one to pick me up at the airport but I guess I'm wrong. I can't believe she'd send such a cute guy to pick me up. You're her friend, I'm guessing?" She babbled on and on.
And I couldn't stop, I cried. I cried in the middle of an airport, in between so many people but I couldn't stop. I didn't want to. I thought I was going to sob but I didn't. Not a single sound escaped my mouth, just tears.
Someone placed an arm on my shoulder but I didn't care. I looked down as I cried. Cool hands pressed against my cheeks, making me look up. The girl was saying something but the words didn't register. She suddenly wrapped her arms around me and I didn't know what took over me but I let her. I didn't push her back like I should've. I needed it. I wanted to believe it was her hugging me, telling me that she's still here.
What hurt me the most was that it had all been served to me on a silver platter before being snatched away so cruelly.
•••••••••
Three weeks later....
"Young Master, you have to go to school," Ms. Nelly said for what felt like the umpteenth time.
I heard the words but they didn't register in my brain. I was too busy looking through another one of the files stacked in a big pile on my desk.
"I'm busy right now, Ms. Nelly," I repeated the only words I've spoken to her in the past days or has it been weeks?
Time didn't slow down for me like it did in the movies. On the contrary, it was all the same. It didn't even leave me behind so I could mope. It dragged me along with it, forcing me to move forward even when I didn't want to move on. Everything was just in it's place. Proper and prim as it always had been. I didn't change. I was still me. Still scared of spiders, still good at studies, still the same disappointment of a son I had been to my parents, still in love with the girl I knew everything about and at the same time nothing.
The only thing that changed was everyday I woke up, I knew I wouldn't see one of her letters on my desk. Everyday when I ate my breakfast, I knew I wouldn't get the chance to even dream about having it with her. Everyday I saw the color pink, I knew I didn't have the hope that someday I'll get to see her in it.
"How are you doing?," Janette's voice broke me out of my thoughts and I turned to see Ms. Nelly leaving.
Janette. Even her name makes me think of Jane. That day after I broke down, Janette wouldn't leave my side. She insisted that she takes me home and makes sure that I'm fine.
Since then, she's been visiting every single day to see how I'm going. It's weird to have her around. The only girl I imagined would ever be in my room was Jane. But now she's here, Janette, and I don't know what to do. I want to tell her to get out but at the same time I want her to stay. I need to know that someone's there. She kept asking me what happened the other day and I never told her. I couldn't tell anyone.
She talked to me everyday and I would pretend that she's Jane. I would pretend that it was Jane I met at the airport that day, I'd pretend I'm laughing with her, eating with her, talking with her. I would pretend that it's her. But then I saw her in pink and I knew, I knew it wasn't her. I knew how wrong it was. So I stopped. I stopped talking to her.
"I'm going out of town for a few days. And I know you don't care but I just wanted to tell you before I left." She told me as she turned her back to me.
She took a few steps before stopping. She turned and opened her mouth before closing it, her eyes held so much curiosity and I knew what she wanted to ask. She played with her fingers, her eyes looking down.
" I...I really want to know what happened that day, even though it has nothing to do with me. I...I understand if I'm being nosy and if you don't want me here anymore, I won't come. I just wish I'd gotten to know you under different circumstances. I need you to know that I don't mean bad and that I like you," She whispered the last part and rushed out the door. I was almost convinced that she never said those words.
••••••••••
Two weeks later....
"Ace, you need to come back to school. You have to graduate. You don't have to move on right now but you need to carry on with your life," Vivian spoke softly.
I ignored her, looking down at the words I have been watching for the past hour.
"Ace, I know what happened." Vivian whispered to me.
"Look, I don't care anymore." I told her.
I had spent the last two weeks telling myself I didn't care and I was almost there, if there meant a thousand miles away from sanity.
It felt like it was all just a dream, a dream too good to be true that ended too soon.
"And I think I'll be there next week," I told her over the phone.
There was silence on the other end for a while.
"Just say it, Vivian,"
"Are you...are you planning to go for..for her funeral," My mind blanked. It simply didn't want to accept the fact that she was gone.
"No," I simply hung up.
Don't think about it.
Don't think about it.
I repeated the mantra in my head.
At this point, I've gone from denying the fact that she...she died to denying the fact that she ever existed.
And I'm somewhat content with that knowledge.
•••••••••••••
"Where are we going," I wasn't the least bit interested in going anywhere right now.
"I'll tell you to take a guess but you're very bad at that. So... we're going horseback riding!!!!" She said while jazzing her hands.
Horseback riding?
"What makes you think that I can ride a horse?" I asked her, raising my brow at in question.
"Mason told me. He told me he's on his way. So, he should be here soon. Also, technically I'm not taking you horse riding, I'm taking you to teach me horse riding," She grinned sheepishly.
"I'm sure Lucas will be more than happy to do that. Wait, does he even know about this?"
"Of course he knows," She rolls her eyes before frowning, "Why does he have to know?,"
She keeps mumbling about controlling rich freaks as we walk out in the open. The vast green fields take up a small fraction of the academy. It was simply breathtaking. There was no other way to describe it. It was more like a meadow, soft green with patches of colours here and there. It was calming. Everything about this place. The lush green grass that made you want to sleep on it, the beautiful splashes of colour amidst it and the horses were a sight to behold. Well bred, well groomed.
My eyes wandered over to the drop fence on the side. Maybe I'll try that today.
"All the best," I pushed my thumb out.
"Thank you," She told me as she prepped herself.
"I'm talking to Maria," I pointed to the beautiful white, almost silver mare whose hair was silkier than any human I've ever met.
Vivian gave me a look that on a scale of scary to nasty came right after
"Are you sure you want to do this?" I ask Vivian who looked like she was being taken to be murdered and not horse riding.
"Are you talking to her or me?" She snapped at me.
I pointed to her.
"How hard can riding a horse be?," She pushed me to the side as she started getting on the horse.
I gave her my 'I support you even though you're gonna regret not listening to me' look.
"I can do this," She put a hand on my face before pushing me away.
"I can't do this!!!!," She shouted in my face as I was helping her get on. Maria neighed at her, almost mocking with a...a smirk on her face? I didn't know horses could smirk.
"I think she likes you. See she's smiling at you!" I pointed to the horse.
"Bitch gonna smile but I know she don't like me!!" She spat in my face and pushed me away before walking off.
Why does that sound familiar?
Girls are so weird.
I started walking Maria back to the stable.
"Oi, where are you goin'?" She hollered at me.
Geez. Does this girl not know how to talk without screaming?
"I'm going to watch and learn. You go ride the bloody bitch and I'll learn by watching." She waved me off.
Talk about bossy. I sulked my way over to the horse before climbing up. It was so relaxing, feeling the wind whipping against your face, the sweet smell of the mud after the rain.
I whipped my head to hear the shouting of a few freshmen riding behind me.
My eyes met a pair of brown ones and after that everything happened in slow motion. Maria collided with the drop fence and I fell off her with a thud. It didn't hurt. Much. Well, it hurt like hell but it didn't hurt as much as falling off a horse should have. I sat up to look behind me to see the racers coming in my direction at full speed. I tried moving but it hurt too much. I squeezed my eyes shut.
What I can't see, can't hurt me, right?
Before I could get crushed, I was hauled up and onto another horse. I held tight on to the rider with my eyes squeezed shut.
The horse came to a screeching stop and I felt silky soft hair whipping across my face as the rider turned around to halfway face me. My eyes met a pair of honey-sweet, deep velvety hazel eyes.
A sweet melodious voice rang in ear, well more like shouted but it was so damn sweet, it was almost sugarcoated.
"Are you numpty??!!!"
•••••••••
Kind of a short chapter but I hope it was worth it. Who do you think the mystery girl is? Did Charlie wake up from the dead? Is it Janette? Is it someone new? I'd love to hear your thoughts.
Next update will hopefully be in a day or too. I don't want to keep y'all waiting.