Chereads / This Time.. / Chapter 8 - Never Been This Bad.

Chapter 8 - Never Been This Bad.

As I strolled through the corridor, making my way towards my classroom, there wasn't a single student in sight. I couldn't help but ponder why the icy and unsettling sensation transformed into a comforting warmth when I engaged in conversation with that guy.

The sensation of being cold and frozen was quickly replaced by a comforting and cozy warmth. It's almost as if I developed a strong dependency on it, despite only having crossed paths with him earlier today.

I found myself becoming deeply infatuated with his magical energy and essence, rather than simply being attracted to his physical appearance.

Seeing him again would surely answer my questions. but now-

I came to a halt just before reaching the door that would guide me into my classroom. I could perceive a multitude of individuals, each possessing their own unique manas within them.

When I assessed them, I found myself drawing comparisons between them and that guy I met earlier.

I let out a brief exhalation, filled with a mix of exhaustion and frustration.

As anticipated, the mana emanating from that guy was considerably more formidable than that of anyone else, almost as if it had the ability to penetrate me at a much deeper level. However, it seemed as though I was diminishing their worth, which was certainly not my intention in any way.

I let out a long breath, gathering my thoughts and steeling myself for what could potentially be a dire situation.

I strongly dislike the experience of being subjected to bullying. However, despite the emotional distress it causes me, if enduring it will ultimately lead to some form of resolution or improvement, I am determined to persevere.

For the time being, I find it unbearable, yet I am compelled to endure it. In accordance with the directives of Count Visterio, I am bound by duty to do so. Alas, the frustration and exasperation I feel are indescribable.

When the topic of bullying came up, a vivid image instantly materialized in my thoughts.

Lena, with a genuine and heartwarming smile on her face, looked directly at me, radiating warmth and sincerity in her expression.

I suddenly jolted awake, my eyes widening in alarm. A wave of guilt washed over me, consuming my heart with aching remorse. In that moment, I allowed myself to sink into a profound silence, seeking solace and reflection.

If it is discovered that I am associated with Lena, she will be put in a perilous situation.

Despite my previous statement about our friendship...

I tightened my jaw muscles, feeling the pressure building in my mouth as my teeth bit down firmly.

"..Fuck!"

I expressed my frustration quietly, with a barely audible whisper escaping my lips.

I find myself constantly questioning why I seem to lack responsibility in various aspects of my life. It leaves me wondering when I will finally step up and start exhibiting responsible behavior. The constant cycle of losing friends due to my own foolishness only adds to my frustration.

I felt my entire body shake with an overwhelming rage, directed both inwardly and outwardly. The anger coursing through me was intense, consuming my thoughts and emotions.

Suddenly, a profound and enlightening idea washed over my mind.

Indeed, it is imperative for me to maintain composure and refrain from losing control. I am fully cognizant of the fact that managing my anger is beyond my ability. When my anger consumes me, I find myself unleashing a torrent of hurtful words upon those in my area, resembling a frenzied individual incapable of reigning in both their words and their rage. However, despite not being deserving, those girls remained in my life for an extended period of time.

I inhaled deeply, attempting to rid my mind of any thoughts that might provoke anger. Then, I ran my tongue across my parched lips.

At this moment, I need to direct my attention towards the present and defer my thoughts about it for a later time.

I extended my arm towards the door knob, disregarding the need to announce my presence with a knock on the door. I contorted my body while exerting force to propel myself towards the door, causing it to gradually swing open.

I could feel the piercing gazes of the people around me, filled with a mixture of disdain and contempt. Among them was a particular individual, whom I deduced to be the Homeroom Teacher, standing with his arms tightly folded and a deep frown etched across his face as he scrutinized me.

I let out a disapproving laugh, expressing my disbelief or contempt.

Wow, I am incredibly grateful for the warm reception and kind hospitality that I have received.

"On the very first day of class, can you believe it? You've managed to arrive late, Lady LeCoultre?"

He repeatedly tapped his foot on the solid wooden floor while simultaneously drumming his finger against his own arm.

I am fully aware of the situation at hand, and it has ignited a strong desire within me to physically confront each and every one of them by delivering a forceful blow to their faces. However, I understand the importance of maintaining composure and self-control in this particular scenario.

"I apologize."

I responded without displaying any emotions.

I had the impression that he became slightly annoyed by my answer, but nevertheless managed to remain composed. The looks I got from my fellow classmates mirrored those of the Teacher.

A feeling of aversion, annoyance, and being underestimated.

There were certain individuals who cast their gaze upon me with an unmistakable eagerness to inflict harm or mistreatment upon me.

"Please take a seat at the rear."

He arrogantly assumed a mischievous demeanor as he confidently gestured with his right arm, indicating both the direction and the chair. His unwavering gaze remained fixed on me, as if daring me to challenge his authority.

I glanced in the direction his hand was pointing and noticed a vacant seat situated close to a window that was wide open.

As I glanced around the room, my eyes landed on an another vacant chair situated on the exact opposite side of where he had gestured for me to take a seat.

I couldn't help but feel a sense of sternness within me. Deep down, I had an intuition that something significant was about to unfold, yet I made a conscious choice to surrender myself to the unpredictable course of events and simply go with the flow.

I let out a deep breath, feeling a mix of frustration, resignation, and weariness.

It seems like there won't be an introduction, but that's okay.

I purposefully avoided making eye contact with any of my classmates, despite the fact that they were all staring at me from head to toe.

I began to mobilize my lower limbs, making my way towards the destination specified by the Teacher. I maintained a steady and focused mindset throughout the situation. I made a conscious decision to overcome my fear and avoid displaying any signs of cowardice.

I struggled with my overwhelming anxiety that arose whenever I found myself in a situation where people were giving me unwarranted attention by staring at me. Typically, I would resort to a coping mechanism of avoiding eye contact and diverting my attention to my phone, with its black screen providing solace and a shield against the piercing gazes. However, on this particular occasion, something within me shifted, and I decided to confront my fears head-on.

At this particular moment, I have no desire to assume the identity of Astria. Instead, it is imperative for me to adopt the role and persona of Dina.

I must maintain a steady facade, concealing any signs of fluctuating emotions.

At this moment, I am not Astria.

I took a seat on a solitary chair, accompanied by a beautifully adorned table positioned in front of me.

Following that, a symphony of muted laughter and mirthful snickers permeated the room, reaching my ears. Discreetly, I stole a quick glance at the individuals in my vicinity, only to find their gaze fixated on me, their expressions laden with disdain and mockery, as if they deemed me to be nothing more than a foolish imbecile.

A subtle smirk played at the corners of my lips.

The peals of laughter abruptly ceased as the Teacher commanded our attention by clapping his hands emphatically.

The Teacher effortlessly captured and held their attention.

I expressed my frustration by rolling my eyes and following it up with a deep sigh.

At this moment, I find myself in a situation where I am obligated to patiently anticipate the occurrence of a calamitous event.

"Let's begin the lesson. Mr. LeCoultre, please be careful - you are new, so we expect a lot from you."

I could detect a barely discernible, taunting smirk playing on his lips.

"Sir, please be considerate. Lady Astria has not yet awakened her ability."

The brat woman, who was undeniably attractive with her hazel curly locks cascading down her shoulders and her mesmerizing light black eyes, sarcastically remarked in a mocking tone.

With the appearance of an angel, it was nearly impossible to detect any hint of mockery in her voice as she spoke to me.

"Right, you are correct. Forgive me for my rudeness."

The teacher responded, unable to contain his laughter.

As soon as my focus shifted to him, a smile spread across my face with lightning speed.

I tightly gripped my hands, which were concealed beneath the table, in order to control my urge to respond defensively. Laughter filled the room once more, only to be abruptly halted by the forceful and sudden opening of the door.

A deafening explosion echoed through the room, and I noticed that the students were diverting their eyes away from me, trying to avoid making direct eye contact.

At that point, I had become aware that the person in charge of this location had made an appearance. Without bothering to glance in his direction, I deduced the presence of a man based solely on the sound of his footsteps.

Before I even sat down, I had already detected the presence of his mana.

Indeed, there is no denying the fact that his mana possesses an undeniably dense quality. However, in terms of sheer magnitude and intensity, it pales in comparison to the extraordinary mana of that guy.

The once lively room had now become hushed, with the only sound that could be discerned being the resounding echo of weighty footsteps reverberating throughout the entire space.

As it gradually approached me, I remained fixated on what lay ahead.

I cannot deny that I am feeling a great deal of nervousness.

I was extremely, overwhelmingly anxious. My anxiety had reached such an intensity that it felt like it could consume me completely and bring about my demise.

The sound of footsteps came to a halt, and a feeling of his presence lingered close by. Despite this, I made a conscious choice to disregard his existence.

As I shifted my gaze towards the faces of my fellow classmates, I couldn't help but notice a multitude of expressions - a mix of curiosity, amusement, and even disdain - all directed at me. Their eyes squinted with intrigue, some even crinkling with laughter, while others seemed to mockingly scrutinize my every move.

The Teacher sported a broad, mischievous grin that stretched from ear to ear, giving the impression that he was thoroughly enjoying the spectacle before him.

"Hey woman. This is my seat. Get out."

I had been eagerly anticipating this moment for a while.

A voice that sounded like a husky and croaky whispered from behind me, and the person wearing the frown on their face became apparent.

I let out a deep breath, expressing my resignation. "Very well then," I reluctantly agreed.

Without hesitation, I rose from my seat and purposefully walked past him without making eye contact.

I made my way towards the rear of the room, positioning myself in quiet contemplation on the opposite side of the aisle.

I observed the man's back intently, noting its distinct silver hue and the way it seemed to be slightly hunched. As I assessed his stature, I couldn't help but notice that he appeared to be roughly the same height as me, perhaps slightly taller by a small margin.

I observed that the individuals I came across in this world possessed unique and uncommon hair styles.

Is it appropriate to watch this only in anime or on television?

Their hair didn't appear to be artificially colored; it looked incredibly authentic and real.

When comparing my current appearance to that of my past life, I couldn't help but notice the striking similarity in our black, freezy hair. However, despite the undeniable resemblance, I couldn't help but wonder what had changed within me that made me appreciate my hair now, when I despised it in the past.

Despite the cold weather, it wasn't completely unpleasant. I found solace in allowing the icy sensation to gently flow down my spine.

However, I had my hair secured in a bun. I didn't bother to put in much effort into styling it, mainly because I lacked the knowledge and skills to do so. Additionally, I had no desire or motivation to try and create a stylish look.

The man remained motionless, seemingly frozen in place. However, after a brief moment, he quietly took a seat on his cherished chair, deliberately avoiding any eye contact with me.

Leaning in, he placed his cheek on his hand, his gaze drifting towards the open window, seemingly indifferent to the unfolding events.

Afterward, I averted my gaze from him and discovered that these people were utterly astounded, their eyes widening in sheer disbelief as if they had never anticipated such a response from me.

However, it appeared as though there was a multitude of other factors at play.

They had the expectation that I would engage in a conflict to secure the position, but in reality, their expectation was that we, as a collective, would engage in a battle for it.

In particular, the teacher plays a crucial role in this scenario.

I fail to understand why I would bother engaging in a dispute over something as trivial as a seat. It seems rather immature to invest any energy into such a matter.

With narrowed brows, he directed a piercing glare towards me, to which I responded by offering him an enigmatic smile, further intensifying his irritation.

A blush began to creep across his cheeks, causing his face to take on a slightly rosy hue.

"Lady LeCoultre, could you kindly enlighten me as to the reason behind your current position of standing there?"

Suppressing his growing anger, he asked, making an effort to maintain a composed demeanor and speak in a tranquil manner.

"Oh, sir, where do you want me to sit? Do you want me to take back the seat you assigned for me?"

I forced a smile to mask the seething anger that was clearly visible on my face, hoping that perhaps I could channel some of that fury into the facade of happiness I was presenting.

He pressed his teeth into his lower lip, feeling the tension in his body as he tightly closed his fingers into a fist.

"I am of the opinion that you are incorrect in your assumption. I adamantly deny any involvement in the actions you attribute to me. It is possible that you are experiencing a state of confusion or misunderstanding due to your lack of awareness or undeveloped potential in utilizing your abilities."

He responded with a self-satisfied expression on his face, clearly feeling superior in his reply.

Everyone in the class, with the exception of the individual with silver hair, erupted into fits of laughter.

What exactly are these sounds? Are they meant to be background music? However, instead of being soothing or enjoyable to listen to, they turned out to be rather irritating.

I let out a long, exasperated sigh "I struggle to understand the reasoning behind assigning a seat based on an ability that I hadn't even awakened yet. I doubt the credibility of the person before me claiming to be my Teacher. It is hard to believe that someone who seemed so misguided could actually hold such a position of authority within the academy. Perhaps there had been a grave mistake in their judgement, leading them to assign me to the wrong seat."

I folded my arms, tilting my head slightly upwards as I raised the corner of my lip in a subtle expression.

His complexion grew increasingly flushed, and he forcefully pounded his feet against the hardwood floor, causing a resounding bang that reverberated throughout the entire room.

He directed his hands towards me, his face marked with a clear display of anger.

"You've gone too far, Lady Astria! Please leave the room immediately. I don't even want to see your face in this room."

He let out a loud and forceful scream, causing his voice to echo throughout the room.

With his arm raised high, he forcefully swung it in the direction of the door.

"Lady LeCoultre is the name by which I am addressed, and based on my understanding, our relationship does not warrant such familiarity that would allow you to use my first name when referring to me."

I pointed out.

As I stood there, anticipating his response, I observed him struggling to find the right words to say, yet he remained silent, unable to utter even a single sound.

"When will I be able to go back?"

I asked in a serene manner, possibly due to experiencing a heightened sense of contentment.

He wrinkled his nose and his eyebrows became even more tightly furrowed.

"Until you finally learn your lesson!"

"Okay. Bye people!"

With a cheerful expression on my face, I waved at them before departing from the room, nonchalantly shrugging my shoulders.

I shut the door forcefully, causing a resounding noise.

I had an overwhelming desire to engage in this particular action, and the sensation I experienced was incredibly pleasurable. It was a level of wrongdoing that I had never before encountered in my existence, surpassing any previous instances of misbehavior.

However, out of nowhere, a sudden realization hit me like a ton of bricks, causing my once vibrant smile to swiftly fade away.

Once again, I find myself in a situation where I have made a serious mistake.

I applied more pressure to my cheek, squeezing it even tighter.

I made a conscious effort to refrain from responding in a retaliatory manner, but it was frustrating and disappointing to restrain myself.

Alright... It has already happened... It is okay... Perhaps...

I find myself pondering over my next destination, contemplating which path to take and where it will lead me.