Physical attraction is fun. It piques your interest and makes you excited about someone new for some time. But if you're looking to take things to the next level with someone you're into, you may want to learn how to create emotional attraction. This is an aspect that John had been a master at; unlike Tom. All successful romantic relationships need both emotional and physical attraction. Jane knew, physical attraction was easy. It usually takes between 90 seconds to four minutes to decide that you like someone. The problem with this however, is that it's fleeting. Physical attraction can change, and this was the case between Tom and Jane at this instance. Emotional attraction, on the other hand, endures: John and Jane were at this level. Jane was attracted not just to John's body, but also to his heart, mind, and dreams. It's what kept both of them engaged and invested in the relationship over the long haul. That deeper connection made Jane want to keep John in her life in comparison to Tom, whom she just had a surface-level attraction to. Presence is powerful. John didn't necessarily need to have an in-depth conversation with Jane to establish an emotional attraction and connection with her. He'd done this a long time ago; he'd been present and fully attuned to what Jane would say, thereby communicating genuine care and interest. This was so unlike Tom; he only cared for himself and his ego. The good boy in John was finally reaping. Jane's only worry was that John wouldn't find out about her relationship with Tom. Jane would relate to John with genuine empathy and positive regard. She was finally noticing the small precious things which she had been missing. John would make meaningful eye contact with her because he was genuinely interested in what she had to say. On the other hand, Tom always had his eyes fixed on her cleavage, and sometimes on her lips.
Relationships that move super fast early on typically end up burning out pretty quickly because they're often built on superficial grounds. And slowly by slowly, Tom and Jane communicated less. The burning desire they had for each other was wearing off, and they didn't seem concerned. Working on the emotional attraction first before the physical stuff is important. If you want to build a love that lasts, think about a skyscraper — create a foundation first. Go down before you go up. Create your foundation down deep, then enjoy the superficial benefits. John; amidst his neediness, he'd scored a distinction with Jane. He'd turned their shared interests into shared experiences. For instance, John had turned mountain climbing into an experience he'd share with Jane. Who knew? One conversation could turn into two, and then it slowly became a regular thing. Whenever Jane went mountain climbing without John, he was all she'd think about.
They'd stay open, relaxed, and fully present whenever they were around each other. Little did they know that those small things would matter one day.
For the first time, Jane noticed that she had a friend in John; amidst her secrets, she could open up to him those that arose no controversy. Over a bottle of Red Bourgogne, they chatted, and laughed away. Jane was careful not to let the contents of the bottle get the best of her, lest her tongue would lose control-she had a secret detrimental to their relationship. John knew his fiancée so well that he had noticed something obscure about her; her phone had a pattern, she texted late in the night, and she'd excuse herself to pick up particular phone calls: blind trust. Being a carefree spirit, John never bothered to ask. He didn't think he'd ever be cheated on by Jane. In his world, she was the epitome of faithful, and the eponym of trustworthy. How innocent of him! For he wasn't to blame; he was groomed in an upright, and unrelenting manner. He was extremely polished in behaviour, and character that sometimes, he was misunderstood for a snob.
Beloved Jane wouldn't go a night without regretting the fruits of her insolence. She was finally an ideal woman; she had a secret. "If only men had the ability to retrieve secrets, i wonder how many relationships would be standing today," she wondered. John had won her heart, but her mind was with another man.
She thought of: who had taken her place at Tom's bedside, the smell of his breath, his soft hands, and heartening laughter. She regretted having met him, and at the same time, she didn't regret. She thought not of the consequences, but of the pleasure. This reminded her of the time she used to sneak into John's hostel to make love to him. Jane loved danger, and the adrenaline it arose, but only in the sexual manner.
She decided to call Tom, and check up on him, but he didn't pick up. This infuriated her the more, and she must have called him up twenty times after that. All her efforts were to no avail. She decided to send him a message, notifying him that she would visit him after work the next day.
She dressed rather seductively that morning. This startled John, for it had been long since she had last dressed like that. She was clad in a puff sleeves short red homecoming dress. It had been a gift from John for her twenty third birthday. She also wore thongs on the inside. John thought of it as a by and bye as he kissed her goodbye. Little did he know that he had just sent her off to the sexual gullows. To him, she was a queen, but to Tom; she was a cunt mine. Often (but not always), when a woman is sexually excited, blood flow increases to their genitals so that the vulva and clitoris swell and the vagina lubricates itself, which is called "getting wet." This lubrication helps with friction and makes vaginal sex more comfortable and enjoyable. This is exactly what was happening to Jane as she drove to work that day in anticipation of meeting Tom. The thought of Tom alone, had turned her on.
When she got to office, all eyes preyed upon her as she walked through the corridors to her work desk. She was clearly enjoying the attention, and she had for a moment caught Tom staring at her thighs.