Aria had spent the week resting to enjoy life in ways she hadn't been able to before. The prospect of ever feeling estranged in her very own home seemed so ridiculous now. How could she have ever longed to find a piece of home and a sense of belonging in the palace alongside the Crown Prince, when there was so much warmth in the Windsor estate, her birth place?
Here, she never had to eat a meal alone. The Marquess would always make time to spend at least the mealtimes with Aria even if he was busy. The maids treated her kindly and Emma never failed to keep her company whenever the Marquess couldn't. Even the knights, to Aria's surprise, doted on her just as much as Emma does and would never miss to entertain her whenever she'd stop by the training grounds.
Life at the Windsor estate had been so peaceful; so why had she struggled so hard to leave in the past? Sometimes, regret would wash over Aria, who felt solemn at the thought of all her pointless struggles in her past life. Why had she chosen to live that way?
While taking a stroll in the garden, Aria began to strengthen her resolve.
(I've decided not to have anything to do with the Imperial family anymore… but that's easier said than done. Father is loyal to the Imperial family and is bound by a blood oath. He serves the Emperor as his right hand man and is the Knight Commander of the First Imperial Knights - even if father is regarded as a powerful man and is favoured by the Emperor, his influence doesn't allow him to defy the Emperor as he wishes.)
(Although the wedding wouldn't take place until after Kian and I have both reached adulthood and made our debut in society, the turbulent circumstances amongst the Noble faction resulted in our engagement being announced early as a means to strengthen the Imperial faction and to silence the restless nobles. Meaning, I have two years before the announcement is made public and I move into the Royal Palace.)
Aria groaned. How vexing.
(Even if both Kian and I have finally come to an agreement that we both hate each other's guts in this life, the Emperor is still the biggest obstacle. Neither father - who I know would do everything in his power to help me if I'd requested it of him - nor Kian, the Crown Prince of this kingdom, could go against the Emperor unscathed.)
(Maybe this was what Kian had felt all those years; to be tied for eternity to the person you despise the most… it's the absolute worst.)
(If I don't have an immediate answer, then should I suggest it be postponed?)
But, will Aria be able to avoid the Palace and her ties to the Imperial family completely? The more she thought about it, the bleaker the future seemed, and the more discouraged she became.
How could she shake off the most powerful man in the entire kingdom? The one whose words weighed absolute and insolence against it is treated as an intolerable act of defiance that could have one imprisoned or, even worse, executed?
A chilling memory flashed by. Her execution day. The cold feel of the guillotine blade on her neck. A moment of inscrutable pain. Death and, eventually, rebirth.
Aria faltered. She'd lost complete control of her body. Her head spun, and her breathing became erratic as her vision eventually blurred. Her hands grasped helplessly at her neck as if it were trying to piece together the part where the blade had cut through.
(What's… happening to me...? Somebody please...)
"Lady Aria!" Emma rushed to Aria's aid. "Sir Wesley! Please help me escort the lady to her chamber."
"What happened to the lady?!" Wesley jogged over hurriedly.
He wasn't even that far away from them, so how could he have missed it? What had happened to the lady while he wasn't looking? But… he was sure he wasn't distracted. So how could he have allowed the lady's safety to be breached while he was guarding her? Was he really that inept? He was responsible for keeping her safe and yet… how could he have allowed for this to happen?
"Was she attacked? Did you see the perpetrator?"
"I don't know… but that couldn't be the case. I was beside her the whole time. She was fine until a minute ago. Could it be a heatstroke? Anyway, we have to call Dr. O'Maley as soon as we get back!"
***
"Aria! What happened–?!"
Marquess Windsor burst into Aria's room in a frenzy. His dishevelled appearance made it apparent to everyone there, that the Marquess had left everything he'd been doing to rush and be at Aria's side the moment he'd heard the news.
The air in the room was heavy. Everyone - from the Marquess himself to Aria's maid and knight - was waiting expectantly for Dr O'Maley's diagnosis. The doctor bit his lip, hesitant to begin. Another glance at the bed-stricken Aria and Dr O'Maley stifled the uneasy feeling in his gut. He didn't have enough evidence to confirm his suspicions and neither did he have enough courage to voice his doubts to the Marquess. So instead, he reported what seemed to be the most likely condition.
"It is nothing to worry about, my Lord. The young lady only fainted due to a mild heatstroke. She should be fine after cooling down and getting some rest."
"I see…" Marquess Windsor breathed a sigh of relief. "That's good."
"Do make sure the lady stays hydrated. Yuriana's summers are known to be harsh, but it seems this summer is even more so."
Marquess Windsor nodded. "Emma, please note to make the arrangements accordingly."
"Of course, my Lord."
"Aria…" The Marquess reached and lightly touched his daughter's forehead.
(Please be okay.)
***
The next day, Kian happened to pass by Marquess Windsor, who had just finished an audience with the Emperor.
"Crown Prince." The Marquess greeted.
Kian noticed how the Marquess appeared more drained than his usual self. His shoulders, one that would always stand tall as Commander, drooped ever so slightly. But the dark bags under his eyes were what made his haggardness so noticeable.
(Was it because of what happened to Aria?)
Kian had heard the news of Aria fainting through his father. In turn, the Emperor had pushed him to visit her as a mere show of his concern.
("Visit her." The Emperor commanded.)
Kian clenched his fists, yet was unable to say one word against him. Through his gritted teeth, he felt something vile bubbled in his mouth. A person had just fallen ill and the only thing he's supposed to do was visit them because of this sick game of charade? How could he stomach such an act of deceit? No matter how much Kian disliked Aria, how could he go there with only thoughts of checking off yet another one of his duties, and not because of his true concern for her?
But, was he… concerned? What if he was? No, he couldn't be.
*Flashback*
("Be nice to her. Marquess Windsor's daughter is someone who is clever and bright. She can be both your greatest asset or your biggest threat. Use her to silence those insolent nobles and dispose of her once she ceases to be of use.")
*End of flashback*
He wasn't a person who could ever be in a position to feel concerned towards her. Yet, Kian found himself asking in spite of himself.
"I heard about Lady Aria. How is her condition?"
"She is recovering well, thank you for your concern, Your Highness."
"That's... good."
A moment of silence elapsed. The Marquess took the silence as an indication that the conversation had reached its end and made a start to leave. But before he could begin doing so, Kian had stopped him once more.
"–Marquess Windsor, would it be alright if I paid Lady Aria a visit?"
The Marquess' eyes widened. As far as he knew, the Crown Prince had always been indifferent towards Aria. If it weren't for Aria who had expressed her strong feelings towards the Prince, the Marquess would have long opposed the Emperor's whims to use his daughter as a scapegoat for the growing unrest amongst the Noble faction and stopped their engagement from ever happening.
(But... perhaps Aria would feel better if she saw the Crown Prince?)
Marquess Windsor let out an exasperated sigh. Though he was reluctant to bring the Prince over, the thought that his daughter would light up upon seeing him was enough to make the Marquess concede.
"The Lady would surely appreciate your visit, Your Highness."
***
Back at the Windsor estate, in Aria's chamber.
"Aria, the Crown Prince has come to visit you."
An unsettling feeling overtook Aria's body when her eyes landed on the person standing next to her father.
(W-why… What is he doing here?)
The queasiness she felt was akin to the feeling of seasickness after being on a boat for too long, or an ache after having eaten something that had gone bad. It started in her gut, like a knot that wouldn't undo itself.
Another glimpse of him was all it took to consume Aria with uncontrollable fear. Those cold, empty eyes seemed to have a certain power over her entire being. It was enough to recall painful memories of the past – ones that would never subside no matter how differently things were to play out in this timeline.
How could she ever forget? Those hollow eyes that had once looked down on her from the seat of the throne, and a mouth that uttered the unfathomable in cruel indifference. He was the sole cause of her demise and the source of her very nightmares.
But, more than what he had done to her, it was what he'd done to their son Aaron that shook Aria to the core with both rage and dismay. Memories of when she had first revealed their newborn son resurfaced. She couldn't erase the look of distraught and disgust that had etched onto his face.
The Crown Prince was the sort of demon who would refuse to even look at Aaron after he was born, let alone acknowledge him as his legitimate son.
("He was a mistake. He… shouldn't have been born.")
Those were the first words her child had to hear from his own father. No one would ever come to know how her heart broke while holding the trembling Aaron in her arms after he'd said those very words.
Aria felt her heart palpitate and all the blood drain from her face at the sight of the monster before her, who stood nonchalant under the pretext of concern. If she hadn't been so shaken up, she would've scoffed in his face. Such a blatant lie and yet he expected her to believe him. He'd never once been concerned about her - neither in her past life nor in this one.
Before Aria could even greet the Crown Prince, she'd already broken out into a cold sweat. Her grip on the duvet tightened as she forced what remained of her consciousness to offer the Crown Prince a greeting for the sake of proper etiquette, before her vision blurred and all she saw was pitch black.
"G-greetings Your Highness…"
"Aria…" Kian noticed the colour drain from Aria's face. "Aria!"
"Emma! Call for Dr O'Maley this instant!" The Marquess beckoned.
***
After checking Aria's condition, Dr O'Maley's expression turned grim. This time, his suspicions were confirmed. He suggested that they talk in a different room so that Aria could rest properly. The Marquess agreed and suggested they should go to his study to discuss, instead. The Marquess also thought that it would be better if the Crown Prince didn't hear about what the discussion entailed and that, if anything, Aria should be the first one to tell him about her own condition.
"I understand," was all Kian could afford to say in his current position, despite acknowledging that a small part of him was hesitant to leave without knowing the cause of Aria's sudden illness. He knew he shouldn't press any further, however. As someone who was only acting concerned, he didn't deserve to stay behind.
***
Back at the Marquess' study.
"My Lord," Dr O'Maley took a deep breath in, "it seems that the Lady is suffering from anxiety attacks."
"Anxiety…?"
"The symptoms Lady Aria is suffering from are similar to that of a soldier suffering from episodes of post-war trauma, my Lord. It is a condition that appears after having undergone extreme distress."
Marquess Winston faltered.
(Extreme distress? H-how could that be? What had happened to Aria while I was away to have exerted such a mental toll on her?)
With his brows furrowed deep in regret and outrage, the Marquess slammed his clenched fist on the wall.
"Wesley, investigate the cause of Aria's distress. If any servant of the Winston estate dared to have caused harm to my daughter while I was away, bring them to me. I will deal with them myself." Marquess Winston cursed through gritted teeth.
Wesley, who had been on standby, bowed deeply.
"I will get to the bottom of this, My Lord."
***
Meanwhile, back at the Crown Prince's study.
"Your Highness, are you listening?" Marcus Beaufort, the Crown Prince's personal knight and closest aide called.
Kian snapped back from his daze.
"Sorry, what was it about Governor Herman?"
"We weren't even talking about the Governor, though?"
Kian rubbed his temple. "Is that so?"
"You've been out of it ever since you got back from the Winston estate. Perhaps, did something happen with Lady Aria?" Marcus pried.
His jab was intended to be one of playful banter, but to Marcus' surprise, Kian's response was grim. Kian wasn't one to show any interest when it came to Lady Aria for as long as Marcus had known him; which is pretty long, considering that Marcus is Kian's childhood friend. The handful of times he did show any sort of emotion though, was usually one of discomfort or contempt. So it'd caught Marcus' interest when he heard that Kian had gone to visit the ill Aria personally.
"Something did happen, didn't it?"
Kian glared at his overly nosy friend. "Enough about her. Nothing happened."
"Hmm… look at those dishonest eyes. Did you finally fall for the lady after seeing her weak, bedridden self?" Marcus teased.
"Don't be ridiculous." Kian bit back.
Kian clenched his fists. They were all lies. But exactly which part of it was a lie? He couldn't tell the truth from lies anymore. Ever since he'd stopped the Marquess and asked if he could pay Aria a visit, he'd been confused. It felt like he wasn't in his right mind... as if he'd been possessed. And when he saw Aria's body going limp after she'd fainted, a sharp pang of inscrutable pain struck his chest, and feelings he'd never thought he'd ever feel towards Aria began to surface. It was an uncomfortable concoction of emotions; one that stirred anguish, guilt and regret into one massive lump in his gut. And a part of him was terrified. Why was he so terrified?
When had he ever felt such genuine concern towards Aria before? Just yesterday he'd been resolute in his resolve to not visit her; and a week ago, he was overjoyed to not have to sit through her morning visits anymore. So what changed? What were these feelings? In fact... to whom did these feelings even belong to?