Sooner our final examination would occur in some couple of months and I wasn't prepared as I used to be before...
All those bullies, keeping myself secret, no support from teachers, even my parents didn't even choose to support at vital situation and choose violence, causing severe depression and total mental break down. Just broke me part by part everyday... the heals were much less than the wounds everyday.
Seemed so much broken, I again decided to explore this unknown world again, where I nevertheless, found as same wounded soul, as I was. And as a good one, I would always help out. Overtime she seemed to need a companion who would support her in worst time, held her high up when she falls down and take care when falls ill. A bond is always I wanted to make with people because, at some point it cures a lot of things than we expect. She recognised herself to me as Yamigen Storgi. And sooner we found another lone guy too who went through such situations and as before we held him high even at his thunderstorms, and sooner he became one of our company of three! He recognised himself, to us as Anthis, who broke away, as his secret blossomed love, Sakuami, faded away with the gust... Sooner we became another best trios(which I still think is it really so?) We sooner created a bond and supported each other, and thoroughly we three tried to solve our challenges and fix them. Gradually everything went quite happy shades again, but clouds of terror was still to come... No sooner, Yamigen cured out of her depression with our help and sooner she got herself a loved one too, Jakuna Zen, who was actually a guy of dark shades and she too felt on his freaking lust not love, and yeh we did our best to save her but nah everything turned into complete vain. And at the last shot on way of saving the innocent one from the shades of dark, she out broke all those care, support and emotional bonds in some seconds with spears of curses and more for the only lust she was running for. Being a guy with hard emotions I tried best to control as much I can...
Again back to Anthis, now he's complete fine and cured out and moreover we can finally make them join again with Sakuami. And everything was nice and sweet, I too shared out my feelings to them as they were the only one I could ask support for, but now seeing them happy started making my storm in soft breeze which seemed that if it cured me. But history repeats itself, sometimes soft breeze indicates the biggest storm to come...
No Further away, soon came the news, that examinations would occur in a week by now, the classes started to increase more than it was, expectations from teachers, no support from parents and sooner I got struck by the news of departure of my pet dog from this world, whom I cared from when it was a child to becoming mother of five... The thunderstorm had already begun and I couldn't do anything except just understanding my fate and in this time my last and only hope was to contact up with Yamigen and Anthis, as they were the only one who could give me some helping hands but the final lightning strike felt upon me when she said she can't help now as she was busy in forbidden game of lagneía with Jakuna, who haven't slept still now and they are busy making love and while Anthis slept early and so didn't response anything back...
My mind broke down completely again, and again where there was that white Periwinkle flower, blasted again in white background, silencing my eyes and mind and fading away soon...
I held my back, resting at the wall and still I want to know the answer. Is it true friendship? That where you take care, love, hold them high at falls and they just completely ditch you at your worst time!? Yes the reason I never protested or never sent out curse back because I never wanted to hurt my opponents nor want to see sad faces in them. Yes, I never share my challenges and emotions with my parents because whenever ever I tried to do so they put it down and if it was something serious they took at as extra load on their mind. And yes I don't want them to face my problems! Everyone would think why I didn't made any loved one of mine, it's all because I'm just a student now who don't even earn a single penny! and keeping a loved one always need maintenance at some point of time, and so also I don't want to become such lover who spend breaking up time to time and make new one!. If I would become one, I'll do my best to become one and the only one. The reason my concentration from studies went away, it's all because our educational system is broken, people start to judge people on basis on mark sheet but not by their personality. Its always like " I receive: 12 years of school and you receive : information that will never help you in life" ...
Life is unfair and it will be until we show our real shelves. Yes I make fake smile because I don't want other to feel sad by seeing a sad face!...
**exhales out his breath**
Suremo crouches near the window, gazing the star full of night sky at 2am and for the first time can be seen the glittering tears from his eyes. He could finally express his thoughts, emotions and feelings to everyone!...
Fellin' the cold breeze
Over the night alone
Haunted by the memories, that make me broke...
Forgotten time with the nightshade low
Gazed at night sky, thoughts around
I've been walking alone through the time
Rules held me down, losin' myself back where I was...
Fake smiles held my back, over the time
Cries made the lone soul, strong
Dark corners became my house...
Its survival game over us!
& society's killing us through its brutal games!
Beating over the night time, alone be the warrior
Broken mind and unsaid cries
As firefly burns the soul, to stand alone at barking dead
We need someone to hate us at our worst
And would love to see jealous waters when the table turns...