Chapter 4 - Let me love...

"Let me be trapped in the rubbles of your heart

.. be the reason why your heart skip to it excited state

.. receive energy and reflect Love" ❤️

#Flashback

"Blessing, he left me for her.. Jeremy left me. Something is wrong with me right? Do you think so?I said sobbing. She held me tight consoling me.

"Babe calm down.. you are beautiful,brained and endowed any man would die for that..his loss not yours"

"Why is all this happening to me? Why does he have to treat me this way? Will I ever get over him? Why does love hurt so much?"

"You will be fine,you have to move on.." Blessing replied giving me a tight hug that lasted for sometime while I soaked her dress with my tears. She was almost crying.

"That's why I don't want to love,it scares me,now look how messed up you are.Jeremiah will definitely regret this."

I cried till i slept off on my bed. Blessing cooked and served me. No appetite for food but she kept on begging me to eat something. I finally ate two spoonful of the rice and drank water after much persuasion from her.

I was loosing my mind... crazy love right? Who would have thought I could be caught in such mess. Being a principled person,I always said no one can temper with my heart but look at me now.... Crying over one fucking dude that is possibly enjoying himself with another woman.

"Gift,love thyself" I muttered

Back to present ✍️

"Hello"

"Hello baby, how are you doing?"

"I'm fine"

"Well I...."

"You forgot me just like that, what did I do to deserve that from you? Even our anniversary.You how much I wanted to celebrate it" I lash out

"I'm sorry,my love.. I'm really sorry, have been busy, really busy...have being on my project work and it's taking all my time. My project supervisor is very tough on me. He kept cancelling my work and all this has being draining me seriously. My lab work and all that."

"Sorry about that"

".but errrm am a bit free now.can we see tomorrow? Please my love,I really missed you"

"No"

"Please my queen,I know I hurt you deeply, will you forgive your love? Please"

"I will think about it" I smiled to myself caught in the web of love. After much persuasion,I agreed. One thing about Jeremiah is that,he is a goal getter and will not rest till he gets what he wanted. He is very good with words... sweet magical words!

Could this be Love or foolishness? Hmm

I went online and discovered he sent me a thousand messages.i blushed.i felt a huge burden lifted from me.One of message was:

"If wishes were horses,I want you to be mine forever while I take you to the world of pleasant fantasy and pleasure.Many are humans but with just you I'm satisfied and fulfilled"

I kept on blushing while reading the messages. I replied them and asked him never to hurt me again and he promised. I just hope it will be fine now..

Wisdom called me later at midnight..He said something about having strong erection that night..I felt insulted. I just made it clear to him never to inform me about that again. He rather sounded emotional.that's not my business anyways. This guy got gut!

Fast forward to few months later

I love my Jeremy, so we are still an item.love suffereth long right? I hope I'm not making a mistake.Jeremy still don't call me often and I just accepted my fate maybe he is really not the calling type. I actually brought that to his attention and he said I'm over-reacting..wawu! over-reating?. But do you think am over reacting? I know communication is important in a relationship why is mine devoid of it?

When blessing realized,we were back together ..she was mad at me.

"You are making excuses for him, what's wrong with you?" She said angrily

"Is not what you think okay"

"I hope so" blessing replied giving me a long hard stare

"Babe,I will be fine"

"You know how it was the last time,am just looking out for you. I might not be always there"

"I know, thanks for being a true friend"

"I don't even know what you saw in that guy" she murmured

My dear blessing refused to talk to me through out the day..I guess I deserve that, but have u ever been in love? Real love? Then you won't blame me. Just hearing his name gives me Unspeakable Joy,his perfume?spark extreme desire and when he talks I watch with dreaming eyes of ....

Exams are approaching, one thing about me is that I don't let my relationship problem affect my studies because I have my parents to make proud and I really don't want to fail them.

Recently, Jeremy has been complaining about making out with him..he actually convinced me that there's nothing wrong with having sex with someone you really love.

"Your smile, your eyes , your voice.. everything turns me on so much..you are purnishing me please"

"I don't want to cheat on you..I have needs,I'm a man" he added

"You know I'm still a virgin, what do want me to do?"

That led to a fight since I won't say yes to his demands. He even said I'm not submissive and so many other hurtful words.i wept my pillow that night. Why is he hurting me like this? Throughout the week,no calls or replies. After two weeks,he called and we talked for a while and he dropped the call. He said the call was a mistake, he wanted to call someone else. I felt horrible. But then what can I do?. Later on, I decided to go for night class to read.i asked my roommate if any one was interested, just one person indicated interest..her name -Hope.At 8pm we were ready to go.

Outside the hostel are different group of people mostly in twos, and a girl..I guess they are mostly dating couples..it's a normal sight at night close to the hostel. At dark corners, some might even be making out. I felt irritated. Due to this, the school management enacted a law against loitering close to the female hostel by boys at night.still they won't listen.stubborn students or maybe they came to school to study 'kpekus' winks.. The school "man o war" was given the power to make sure everyone obey the rules but then what can ordinary "Man -o - war" do

When we got to the class,I saw so many students.. students are serious in this school wawu! I sat down at the back while Hope sat at the front. I brought out my note,prayed and started reading. At exactly 12 midnight most students were already sleeping,I guess they are resting.Then I decided to rest too at least for an hour,then I thought of Jeremy..my Jeremy! Sweet Jeremy! I remembered the kiss we shared and the moments he professed his love for me. Those magical moment.... smiles. I also imagined us getting married and having beautiful twin babies. Then I dozed off smiling...

At exactly 2am,I was up.i continued reading I needed to cover the note and its quite huge.After sometime, Hope walked to my seat.

"That's how people will be claiming they came for night class meanwhile they came to sleep" she said laughing

"Hahahaha, such is life.. what about those making out, outside the classroom.. deceiving their roommates that they are going for night class"

We chatted for a while and then went out ease ourselves. Walking down,we heard a female voice moaning.

"Babe am feeling it deeply,aarrrhh" she moaned

Just then we started laughing.

"Instead of you to be deep into your book,a man is deep into you...what a life!!" Hope said laughing.

I felt so irritated,then I remembered Jeremiah's request. I can't stoop so low. I'm a woman of virtue. We ease ourselves and went back to reading.

After sometime,I checked the time,it was 5am already..we needed to get back to the hostel now.i picked my books into my bag and we left.

Getting to the hostel,we heard about what happened when we left. Man-o-war came to flog students that were loitering around but fight issued between a cultist and the man-o-war. guys..gbai gbai!!! . Nothing serious though but the cultist guy threatened them. Hmm when it comes to my school,a threat should not be taken likely.i wonder what would happen today.i thought to myself.

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"Ouch!"

"Sorry it's just the tip"

"Wait wait" I cried