"I can't wait to meet you. Honestly. My brothers keep telling me that you're not real and it's probably a creepy, old man sending me these letters but I know that's not true. I can feel it in my gut. That sounds weird. Please don't think it's weird lol. I think this is enough paper for this letter. I'll send you another one as soon as I can.
Love,
Akira"
I've read this letter so many times, the words were permanently etched into my mind. Honestly, I've been reading them all since I found out but this one, in particular, stayed with me the most. I even carried it around sometimes so that I can read it when I have a bit of free time on my hands. I thought about it and I realized that I hold on to it because, in a way, it marks the end of an era that I was unfortunate enough to not be there for. This letter beats all the other letters because they all have a continuation; there's always a letter that comes after it.
The doorbell rings.
I grabbed my purse and keys and made my way to the door. I already knew who was at the door. He was 5 minutes early as usual but this time I appreciated it. I really wanted to get on with the day. I opened the door to his tall figure leaning on the frame, practically blocking me from getting out.
"You ready?" He asked.
"Hello to you too." I smiled. I was trying to lighten the mood but I was as nervous as ever.
"Hi. Are you ready?" He repeated himself.
"I think so. But are you? You seem a bit off. More than usual anyway." I chuckle. I know he's not used to doing this kind of thing but he was bordering on discomfort at this point. I just didn't want him to be uncomfortable.
"I'm fine." He smiles weakly. "I just want to make sure that you're ready for this."
"Let's go before I back out," I say.
He pushes himself off the door frame and moves out of the way so that I can lock my door. We make our way to the elevator and into the parking garage in the basement where his assigned parking spot is. We get into the car and we make our way to the cemetery where she's buried. We sit in silence the whole time. I'm so used to it at this point, I don't even bother connecting my phone to the car's Bluetooth and playing some music. It gives me time to figure out what I'll do when I finally 'meet' her. There were a lot of things I wanted to say when Haru offered to take me but nothing felt right. Eventually, I thought that the words would just come to me once I got there. Now that we're actually on the road, it feels like I just can't say any old thing.
We went up a really curvy road before he finally pulled up in front of a massive black gate. The gate opened after a guard talked to him a bit. He parked the car and we got out. One thing that I have to say is that this is one of the most well-kept cemeteries that I've ever seen. A lot of the ones I've been to had either been completely deserted (and why I went there remains a mystery even to myself) or are still functioning but completely uncared for. They effectively adopted the 'no sign of life' aesthetic and made visiting a loved one even harder than it already is. This one made visiting the grave somewhat pleasant. The grass surrounding the area was lively green and mowed evenly, there were no stray leaves lying about, and even the tombstones were arranged in a particular order that made everything neater.
As I took in the unexpectedly beautiful scenery, we stopped.
"This is it." Haru said.
The scene suddenly wasn't as bright as it was initially. And while the dread I had felt for the past few months had disappeared, I still had no words to tell her. The Akira I knew was from the letters. What do you say to a person who was clearly much more than a few words to so many people?
"You don't need to say anything. I think you guys said everything you needed to back then." Haru wrapped his arm around my shoulder.
As we stood there, I could feel her presence and, in the weirdest way, it was comforting. The wind rustled the leaves above us as if it was telling me that it's alright. And it was.