It was a sweltering Saturday afternoon, the perfect kind of weather to seek refuge in air-conditioned stores. As Zemar entered the massive shopping mall, the cold air swept through his fur, leaving a refreshing sensation. Three floors with glass walkways connected the levels and greeted him with bustling activities. Many parents were tugging their small children along while pushing strollers with young babies that have fallen asleep peacefully inside. There were also a few couples who strolled hand in hand lovingly, looking around casually for suitable clothes to try. The place was also crammed like sardines and there was hardly any space to move, and it was even harder for his large size. Sometimes the customer's skin and his fur even brushed against each other, and they gave him the stink eye like it was his fault. They proceeded to the second floor via the escalator after scanning the crowd briefly. He had never been on moving stairs before and was nervous, scared that it wouldn't be able to hold his weight. The second floor was relatively less crowded as it was the typical lunch hour, so the customers were enjoying their lunch in the crowed, fenced area where the restaurants were. There was a famous coffee shop named Junkin Donuts, popular bookshops and clothing brand stores just to name a few.
Additionally, there was a variety of restaurants to choose from; ranging from local delicacies to popular Italian cuisine favored by the youth. The customers were spoilt for the choices they have in dining selections. The smell of food was appealing to him as it wafted into his nose. He had to fight the urge to ask for something because Andy and Liz had more important things to do than buy him food at the moment. During the time since they entered this spectacular establishment he never let go of Andy's hand, no matter how silly it looked. Liz was right, this place was busier than shit and being that he hadn't been with the family long, there was no way he'd recognize their scent from the other humans that roamed the tiled walkways. The overwhelming sound of boots and shoes clacked on the floor, and people talking and laughing blended into one big murmur. Zemar clutched Andy's hand tighter, the sounds threw him off balance as his eyes narrow with anxiety. He switched his gaze to each noise that passed by them when heading to another set of escalators.
"Relax Zemar, don't let go and everything will be fine. I promise," Andy's voice was barely heard over the other humans mingling.
The departmental stores that are on the third floor were humongous, they occupied the whole level when he noted the banners around the mall. They state sales for a variety of stores. Some of the sales clearly explain why many middle-aged women were selecting the daily necessities they needed, and men were trying on business apparel; as they could gain a discount of 50% off all the products bought only on that day. While the sales promoter was introducing a particular product, a few curious families gathered around to watch. The loud noisy chattering and discussions of customers resonated around the department and his ears to the extent that he wanted to leave, badly. He felt his hands start to sweat and shake, his breathing quickens and he covered his one ear in an attempt to block out the anxiety that rose up. However, an interesting leather jacket caught his eye in an instant as he remembered he lost his last one in the forest. Seeing that Zemar was interested in a product, a friendly sales staff approached him and Andy. The man told them it was the perfect time to purchase, but the long, snake-like queue was only ended when Liz shot them down by saying, not interested. She said it in a very passive- aggressive way before she trudged along her way with them following. Zemar glanced back at the human to see that he wasn't hurt by Liz's tone and quickly found another customer to spew his nonsense to. These sales staff were resilient. It wasn't long till they stopped at a bulky map of the whole mall, showing every store on every level with little details and a poor legend. A small 'you're here' sign pointed directly to this map and where they were currently located in the massive mall,
"How doesn't anyone get lost in here? These maps are useless!" He leaned in closer to examine the large, plastic map.
Andy chuckled his agreement,
"They're not the greatest, but they mostly work," Andy smiled and surveyed the map. Andy searched for something in particular,
"Ah! There it is. Zemar, you stay with mom for a bit. I gotta pop into this store nearby. I won't be long," Andy smiled and gently pulled away from his strong grip. He felt lost already when Andy merged into the crowd and disappeared. He turned around to make sure Liz was still here with him, she stood looking at the map like she was looking for something to do while Andy did his shopping. He twiddles his fingers like a nervous child,
"Come on, we're going this way," Liz waved a hand for him to follow. He had a tough time keeping up as she weaved through the people, Liz was so fast, and it felt like she was trying to lose him knowing he wouldn't be able to find her. Just as he caught up,
"Wait here," Liz ordered and popped into the hair salon, the neon light of the sign in the window gave a statement that it was open and ready for guests. He waited patiently outside and Liz came out within a minute,
"Okay, so I won't be too long, just going to get a quick trim. Hold my purse and wait here, I'll be out in a jiffy," Liz smiled and handed him a small beige purse. That smile of hers made him uneasy as he squeezed the small, pink pleather purse tightly, afraid he'll lose it as Liz vanished inside. He took a calm breath in and leaned against the store front wall, and begun his wait.
Half an hour went by and he got adjusted to hearing the loud buzz of the crowd and was able to think more clearly as he took a deep breath. This mall wasn't just full of humans, there were a few Demons that wandered around. They stayed mostly to themselves and avoided bumping into people as if the mortals were high royalties. He wasn't as lucky as them, those Demons were much slimmer than him as he gazed down at his gut and gave it a poke. It was hard as a rock, his stomach wasn't fat, it was pure muscle as he gave it a flex. His fur rippled as a thick, eight-pack revealed itself. He worked out every day for all his life and it gave him the excuse to be proud of his abs even though when he relaxed, he resembled a fat, cuddly teddy bear. He gave his stomach a quick slap and it jiggled, it brought a smirk to his face before he looked back up towards the crowd. Upon further observations, there were even a couple Angels that roamed, their white ass, feathered wings drew eyes full of awe. It made him snort with disgust,
"Stuck up birds," he remarked with a soft scoff. He slouched further on the wall and turned his gaze away to stare at the floor with a sigh.
"Liz has been in there for a long time... I wonder what goes on inside a salon," he peeked in through the glass doorway only to see the reception desk, and a woman that quickly typed away at the computer while answering a phone. It seemed like a boring job as he returned to his people watching, as he observed, some people would hurry along as others leisurely stroll past him till a set of security guards caught his eye. He was holding a woman's purse and without realizing the face he had given; they glimpsed in his direction to find he looked suspicious.
"Hey Demon, what ya got there?" the officers came up to him as he shrunk away, wanting nothing more than to merge into the wall and disappear. He was tired of getting in trouble with the law.
"It's m-my friend's purse. She's just inside," he stuttered while indicating towards the hair salon,
"Oh yeah? What's her name?" they inquired with a curious eyebrow, not trusting his nervous tone.
"Liz," he answered quickly, but realized that he didn't even know their last name.
They take a quick glance at each other before one pulled out a set of handcuffs and their black, wooden bully sticks.
"Don't make any sudden moves, Demon. Lay onto your stomach,"
"Don't resist and we won't have to make a scene,"
"Why? I did nothing wrong," Zemar growled. He was no longer nervous when the anger of being judged arose, and he became defensive. He stood up straight, his chest puffed out at the officers, but they didn't back down and he refused to kneel.
"I don't want to have to use force,"
"Ha! Like you could force me to do anything!" The commotion drew eyes on them as people stopped to watch the two human guards face off against a huge Demon. Murmurs of the growing crowd were whispered on the wind as they made bets and were concerned for the officers.
"We just want to ask you a few questions. Don't make me use this," the one moved closer and threatened him with the stick.
"Fuck you!" he spat and raised his middle finger at them, the officer clenched his jaw and whacked the inner part of his leg, just behind the knees. It made his leg feel like jelly and he collapsed to the floor, as soon as he hit the ground, they both jump on him and pulled his arms back to cuff his wrists.
"Get off me ya stupid cunts!" he cussed while struggling under their combined weight, even though he had the strength to get up, the cuffs made it difficult to lift himself off the floor. He flailed his legs, and tried to get free, but those invisible chains came back and tightened around his throat again as he scanned the crowd of fearful people. All their eyes beating down on him, he could hardly breathe, it was suffocating him as his anxiety grew. Where is Liz? Where is Andy? Did they leave him behind? he thought. His gaze rested on the purse that was only an arm length away and saw a hand pick it up, there stood Liz. What was she doing? Isn't she going to stop this? he thought. He stared up at the woman and saw the same fear in her eyes like everyone else,
"Liz... Liz help me please! Tell them I did nothing wrong!" he begged in desperation. He didn't want to go to jail, he didn't want to be taken away or abandoned. Not again.
Zemar continued to stare with sadden eyes, he was waiting for her to stop the officers, to protect him, but all she did was stand there. Frozen in place and not even batting an eye, like she pretended not to know him.
"Ma'am, do you know this Demon?" the older security officer directed the question to the woman, his white moustache twitched in annoyance. Liz hesitated while switching her gaze between Zemar and the officer, what was she doing? All she needed to do is say yes, to say she knew him, but she was hesitating. He looked at her with icy blue eyes as they darken, and glaze over once he realized Liz was just the same. This family was just like the Grimm Reapers, they didn't care about him and she was proving it every minute she stood silent. His struggling slowed to a halt and he turned towards the floor, resting his cheek on the cold tile, he gave up. What point was there if nobody was going to fight for him, giving up was the only thing that seemed easy. The only way to end all his suffering and pain. Zemar softly closed his eyes, accepting his fate as he waited for Liz to say that word and the officers take him away. The mumbling of the crowd faded into the distance and the only thing he heard was his heart, slowly beating on the tile. It felt broken all over again as those chains weighed him down, dragging him through the floor and into the earth like a coffin. Things won't change, his life won't get better no matter how much he tried, no matter how much he changed. He'll always be the odd one out, the second son.
He fully submitted when they yanked him from the floor and held his forearm tightly in their grip, the one started to walk him away from the crowd when a small voice was heard. It was barely noticed at first,
"Unhand that Demon," a soft voice silenced the constant murmur, but was still unclear in his mind.
"Ma'am, this Demon, did he or did he not try to steal your purse?" the officer demanded an answer, not wanting to waste anymore of his time when its easier to just blame. The other officer turned and Zemar looked up from the floor to see Liz step out from the crowd.
"No he didn't try to steal my purse. Now, unhand my son!" Liz demanded while walking up to the officer and pointed a rough finger onto the man's chest. The officer gave his partner a silent order to release the accused,
"Release the Demon. We're sorry to have bothered you ma'am," the officer apologized with a sneer before they return to their patrol of the mall. He rubbed his sore wrists as the large crowd dispersed like nothing happened,
"S-Son?" he was confused by the sudden change in title. Liz walked up beside him with a nervous smile,
"Sorry, it was the first thing that popped in my head..."
"Ah... Y-You could've just said you were my friend. Mall cops don't have any real authority, they couldn't send me to jail without solid proof," he bit his tongue. They had lots on him if they just searched his name. Hit man, serial killer, Angel of death, just to list a few. Zemar stared vacantly off into the distance and flinched when Liz started talking again,
"Zemar... Uh listen, I'm ashamed for what I've done and I regret it dearly," she spoke with a shudder. He didn't understand at first until the next thing that came out of her mouth, and everything became clear.
"I knew security would talk to you, they've been eyeing you up all day... I-I wanted you gone. I hoped that they would arrest you without question and take you out of our lives but... when you looked at me. I knew I made a mistake...,"
"I figured you do something like that or, you'd try and lose me in the crowd," he softly snickered half to himself knowing he was right.
Liz took his hand tightly,
"Listen, It took me years to get any decent sleep without thinking Demons are out to get me, and then even longer to get over my fear of being around Demons. Now I'm living with one. It's not something I can adapt to easily and it's not like I don't want to... I realize not all Demons are bad and I'm sorry for treating you so poorly... I pray we can somehow put this incident behind... and that it's not too late to ask for forgiveness," Liz looked deep into his eyes, holding her heart out.
"How can I fucking trust you after that? Do you expect me just to fucking forget when I've already been betrayed and abandoned already? That ain't fucking happening sister," he scoffed and jerked away to peer over the glass railing. Liz sharply exhaled and bit her lip in frustration,
"What can I do to make it up to you?" She implored,
"There's nothing you can do, there's nothing anybody can fucking do..." he groaned. Feeling a heavy weight on his chest as he leaned against the railing, the gravity threatening to drag him over the edge and end it all. It's not like the fall would do anything though, he would be up and walking within the hour, sometimes it felt like he couldn't kill himself even if he really tried. Zemar stared at the distant floor, he was so focused on keeping his emotions in check, that when Liz rested her tender hand on his ribs, he nearly broke. That soft, tender touch had more power to it than he realized.
"You have no fucking idea what it's like to not belong... To be unwanted to even your own family. You wanna know what I want? What I truly fucking want?" He paused to look at Liz with eyes full of tears,
"I want a family, I want a home. I want some place to feel safe and fucking wanted... Now tell me how you plan on making it up to me?"
"I..."
"How!" He spat. Liz backed away and held her fist on her rapid chest, Zemar heard her heartbeat accelerate as fear wafted to his nose. His eyes dilate in excitement of the scent before he shook his head,
"You're just like everyone else," he scoffed and turned away just as Andy walked up.
"Hey, how's it... Is everything alright?" Andy came up with a bright smile and a skip to his step until he saw his mother was trembling and Zemar had evidence of tears.
"A-Andy…. I-It's all good. Did you get what you needed?" Liz faltered as she directed her attention towards her son, Zemar didn't even take a sideways glance at him.
Andy could tell something bad must of happened and tried to help by distraction,
"Yeah I did, it was on sale… Can we go get ice cream now?" Andy requested with a small grin. Zemar gave his eyes a quick wipe before he gathered the courage to look at his so-called friend. Liz grinned brightly and nods,
"Yes, we can go get ice cream," Andy grabbed his mother's hand in excitement and led the way. Zemar watched from behind as they headed towards the nearest escalator. He squeezed his other arm tightly and sucked the inside of his cheek, half expecting to be left behind once again. He was still nervous about the massive mall but, the anger welling inside chased away any nerves. His breathing quickened and he half peered over the railing again, focused on the other floors he was startled when something grabbed his hand. He faced the pull and saw Liz slightly smiling as she held his hand and led him away from the incident with Andy.
After enjoying the coolness of the pleasant frozen treat, Zemar and Andy tagged along for the ride as Liz finished her errands. It was a great way for him to see the city as well as time to think about what Liz had done and said, is it something he could forgive? Can he forgive? What happens if she tries again? he thought. Zemar exhaled heavily and gazed backwards at the cab of the truck, to his surprise Andy's smiling features was able to ease his rapid, distressed mind. Andy will be there for him, he's proven that a couple times now. Even though it was just Andy's nature to help, he trusted him, he even trusted Rick a little bit but, Liz. Can he trust her? The torrid heat of the evening beats down on his already hot mind as a relieving breeze ran through his fur while Liz drove. They pass by large glass buildings of every size and the sun would reflect against the windows to create shaded areas. It helped to lessen the heatwave. Even though the heat didn't bother him much, the brisk shade was nice and reminded him of fall as it inched closer with each passing day. The quietness of the drive brought another problem to his already busy mind, would it really be a good idea to stay with them knowing what could happen. What if the Grimm Reapers found out he's alive? He sat in the back of the pick-up and gazed up at the darkening sky, navy blue stretched its claws outwards and splashed red light on the only clouds remaining as they made shapes.
They got home just as the sun was on the horizon,
"Aw man! What a day," Andy gave his arms and back a good stretch to combat sitting in the truck for so long. Zemar hopped out of the box and rubbed his ass as it tingled from being numb,
"How did you like the mall?" Andy inquired as they walked to the front door. He glanced away with a shrug,
"It was alright. I rather not go back there anytime soon though, I didn't like the crowd,"
"Aw that's too bad. Maybe, if you're willing to give it another chance, we'll go during the week when it's not so busy and then you can see how nice it is," Andy grinned, he nodded in agreement.
After dinner, Zemar helped Liz with the dishes. It was quiet between them as Liz slightly whistled a soft tune, he couldn't help but think about what happened today. What can he say? He had to say something,
"Liz, Uh...," he stammered,
"I'm going to stop you there. I get you had trauma in your life, so have I, and it's not something you can easily forget," Liz paused with a quick exhale. He held his head low, she was right, he wasn't the only one who had problems in his life.
"I... I was attacked by a Demon once before when I was little. It was trying to flee after stealing from the drug store. It must've been high from something but as it ran towards me and my dad... It tore my back pretty good and being a small child... Well, all I can say was, it was a lot of hospital visits," Liz explained with a heavy heart as she lifted up her shirt. Zemar gaped at what he saw, all down her back were deep scars of claw marks.
"I see," he set the plate that he was drying on the counter,
"It's not that I don't want you here. You're kind to us but... After that attack in the forest. It just brought back all those bad memories and I thought that if I got rid of you, those memories would disappear into the dark again. I don't know if you could ever forgive me after the betrayal you've been through prior. I just want you to know that I'm glad you're still here," Liz smiled kindly and bowed with closed eyes. Bowing was a great sign of respect among Demons. They were vulnerable when lowering their head and it would show that they would risk having their head chopped off for that person.
"Please don't bow, I don't deserve your respect..." he huffed, Liz kept her head low,
"I was scared but, after seeing your face and how defeated you looked... I couldn't let that happen. My husband may be a child at heart, but he does occasionally spew some wise words. You saved our lives and I shouldn't treat all Demons as if they're out to get me," Liz frowned. He sighed and pulled Liz up, standing rigid he wasn't sure how to act, that felt wrong. Nobody had ever bowed to him before, not even his own brother. He mostly stood in the background as the other Demons bowed to his family.
Zemar twisted away and finished drying the last of the dishes as he collected his thoughts,
"You have every right to be scared of me, I am something to be feared... I also have the right to be pissed for what you did but... For some reason, I'm not. I expected as much... I don't accept your bow either. My whole life I was never worthy of an honour and I've done nothing to receive such. Doesn't matter how many times I save you or your family it won't wash away the sins I've committed..." he paused.
"All the lives I've taken..." he whispered while he imagined thick, blood stain his furry hands as it ran down his arms and onto the floor, hitting the tile with a splat. His icy blue eyes dilate and flicker crimson as a small grin twitched in the corner of his mouth. No matter how much he tried to suppress the horrid feeling, he enjoyed taking lives. Maybe it was the idea that he was taking something evil out of the world that gave him such a rush. He clutched his right hand tightly and looked back at Liz,
"I'll never be free of these chains connected to my past but, I can control how I act towards my future," he relaxed and held out the same hand towards Liz. He did his best to smile in the kindest way possible,
"I may not ever forget but, I can as least forgive," he purred. Liz smiled in a motherly way and shook his hand,
"That's good enough for me."