"Everything is going to be alright. It will all end," she whispered to soothe her.
A while later, she said," I'm so sorry for always defying you Mom. This is entirely my fault."
Li Mei would have said that she warned her but being a parent, she knew which words she didn't have to say to her daughter in this state.
"We tend to do crazy things when we are in love. The good thing is that you have discovered that he's not good for you before it was too late."
When they pulled away, Li Fei wiped her tears saying," I'm sorry for troubling you." "Silly. Of course you have to trouble me," she said. "It's just because.. you warned me several times but I didn't listen." "We all do mistakes FeiFei. When did it happen?" she asked. "Two weeks back. I've been staying at Jianyu's house because I didn't want to worry you."
"Jianyu is such a darling. Although I would have preferred to have you here and take care of you myself," she replied. "Thank you Mom."
"Cheer up FeiFei. You will find a man who will love you." "I don't think I will ever love a man the way I loved him," she said. "The way you loved him or love him?" asked Li Mei. "Well, both I guess. I know it will take time but I will be okay." "Surely, you will be okay. We ain't going to spend the whole day locked up. Let's go out and do some shopping," Li Mei suggested as she got up.
"Mom, I don't want to. I would rather stay here." "No FeiFei we are going out. I will be back in a flash," she said before leaving the room.
Li Fei groaned in frustration and threw her head back.
A while later, Li Mei came back and said," Let's go." Picking her handbag, Li Fei followed her out of the house.
Going to the mall, Li Mei shopped a number of things and looked at her daughter then asked," You ain't going to buy anything?" Shaking her head in refusal, she said, "Come on FeiFei.
Jiang gave me the card to spend as much as I want. Get something." "Nothing has caught my attention," she replied.
"You shouldn't make your life miserable just because of him," she commented and Li Fei wondered what she will do if she finds out that she tried to commit sucide. She prayed that she never finds out. "I will choose for you then," she said as she made way towards the women section.
When it was lunch time, they went to a restaurant and ordered food for themselves.
In the middle of the meal, Li Mei asked,"Hasn't he made an effort to contact you so that you could talk things out?"
Her body stiffened for a moment at the question and she slowly shook her head.
Her eyes narrowed and she asked," But what exactly happened?"
Seeing her hesitation in answering, she said," Okay okay I understand that you don't want to talk about it. It's just that I find it difficult to believe that he let you go. He seemed adamant in doing it." Li Fei took a while to say, "He got bored, maybe."
"Okay let's not talk about him. How has been Jianyu treating you?" "Good. You know how kind he is," she continued eating her food. "I don't think it's only kindness. It's love," she said and her lips twitched.
"You know I don't feel the same way." "It can change anytime. You know, I didn't love your father at first too. I was in love with someone else but my parents decided that he was the one I should marry. But after spending time with him, I got to love him and so much." "Where did that man go?" Li Fei asked. "I've taken years without hearing from him. The last I heard, he had divorced his wife," she said. "Was it because of you?" she asked. "Enough talking about me. The conversation was on you."
In the evening when they had gone back home, Li Mei said, "You're staying for the night, ain't you?"
"I think I should," she replied. Only here was the place she had left to feel at home.
She then got a call and saw that it was Jianyu.
"I'm outside. I came to pick you up," he said the moment she picked. "Oh, I'm sorry but I'm sleeping over. I should have told you had I known that you were coming," she said. "It's okay. I will wait for you tomorrow. Have a good night and tell your mother that I sent my regards."
"I will tell her. Have a good night and a safe journey," she said before hanging up.
"It was Jianyu, wasn't it?" asked her mother when she came. "Yes. He had come to pick me up." "He's such a nice man. Why don't you give him a chance FeiFei?" "Again with that Mom?" she asked standing up and she made way to the bedroom.
After dinner, Li Fei asked to sleep with her mother and she readily agreed.
"When last did we sleep together?" Li Mei asked as she entered the bed. "I don't clearly remember." She inched closer and embraced her then began stroking her hair.
She closed her eyes and savored the feeling of being held by her mother and she said," Thank you Mom." "For?" "For everything. For understanding me and not judging me."
"What are mothers for?" she asked.
Looking at her, Li Fei said," Mother, I'm going to Shenzhen."
"Why?" "I need to have a change of environment. I think that it will help me forget."
"Is it a vacation?" she asked. "I don't know. I may choose to come back or stay there."
"Is it really necessary? Let's stay here. You don't know anybody there and I will worry about you." "You don't have to worry about anything. I'm going with Jianyu."
"What?!" she couldn't believe it. "Yes. He also wanted to leave Beijing for sometime and he decided to come with me. It's nothing beyond that." "Okay then. You can go."
She rolled her eyes and said," Uhm, mother. Is there any news about Liu Han's whereabouts?"
"She's not yet been found but the police is still looking for her." "Okay."
"Speaking of Liu Han, I think going to Shenzhen with Jianyu is a good idea. It is much safer than here in Beijing," she said and Li Fei closed her eyes.