Dimas' room was so quiet after he told the truth about how he felt about Natalie. Dimas looked right into Natalie's eyes. He wanted to make Natalie sure of his feelings. However, the longer Dimas stared into Natalie's black eyes, the deeper he sank into those eyes that seemed to be hiding something big.
"Dimas…" Natalie called out Dimas' name, which made the owner of the name tense. Dimas was so nervous because he was waiting for Natalie's response to his confession a few moments ago.
Natalie's jaw was clenched tightly. She should be happy to hear Dimas' confession to her. However, for some reason, Natalie felt a sense of urgency at Dimas' confession. Dimas seemed to be in a hurry to make a confession, as if there were things that made Dimas have to immediately admit it to Natalie.
"I dislike." Natalie said in a cold tone. Her eyes stared intently at Dimas.
Dimas's eyes widened. It was obvious that he was surprised when he heard Natalie's words. "U-uh, what don't you like, Nata?"
Fear immediately entered Dimas' heart. He was frightened after hearing the disapproval in Natalie's words. Don't tell me it refers to…
"You made a confession not with all your heart, Dimas. You seem to be pressed for something and want to win me like a match." Natalie pursed her lips, her face gloomy.
The atmosphere in the room instantly turned heavy. It was so hard to just breathe under this pressure. Dimas was stunned, Natalie was aware of the anxiety that filled Dimas.
Dimas became confused. No! Dimas did not mean to make his confession insincere because he felt pressured by the situation. Dimas admitted that he was afraid that Natalie would be snatched away by Dave because their relationship seemed close. What Dimas is even more afraid of is that Natalie is Dave's lover.
So, without Dimas knowing it, the words he spoke contained the desire to win Natalie like a match. Dimas immediately shifted his body to get closer to Natalie.
"Nata, I didn't mean that. I just…"
"Just what? You want to have me, that's why you immediately made a confession, even though you're still unsure of how you feel?" Natalie's expression grew grim. There was anger in her eyes, and it was realized by Dimas who had been staring right at the eyes that were now intimidating him.
Dimas shook his head, he tightened his grip on Natalie. "No! Listen to me, Nata! My feelings for you are not just because of an urgent situation! I'm really sincere…"
Dimas did not continue his speech when he felt a rough edge on his hand. Natalie distanced herself from Dimas. This action made Dimas freeze.
W-what? Natalie turned him down?
Natalie stood with her hands clenched at her sides. This is not what Natalie wants! The Dimas that Natalie knows is not someone who recklessly makes confessions by urgent desire.
Natalie's body trembled with anger. "I didn't expect you to underestimate a feeling of love, Dimas! You really let me down!"
Natalie turned and walked away from Dimas' room. Dimas, who was in shock, could not prevent Natalie's departure. Dimas head down looking at his shaking hands.
Natalie brushed off Dimas' hand. Through these actions, Dimas can feel what Natalie feels about him. Dimas lips trembled, his eyes suddenly heated up. "I-I… I didn't mean to make my confession sound insincere, Nata…"
Dimas's fingers ran through his hair and squeezed it in frustration. "I admit that I do feel pressured, Nata! B-but, that's because I saw you with another man! How can I calm down in a situation like that?"
"I'm scared, Nata… I'm afraid you're just playing with me, and it turns out you already have someone you love. The thought of you being with another man makes my chest tight. I don't even know why my chest hurts so much when I think about things related to you."
Dimas covered his face, tears flowed from between his fingers, showing how sad Dimas felt. It's so obvious that Dimas' chest hurts when he thinks of Natalie. It felt like something was missing in him.
Emptiness filled his heart after waking up in the hospital three months ago. Dimas felt he had forgotten many important things. But, what had he forgotten?
Every time Dimas asked himself about this, he only met a dead end. Even when Dimas forced himself to dig up all his memories in case he accidentally forgot something, Dimas found nothing but emptiness.
"I feel like an idiot, Nata… I guess I shouldn't be where I am now, Nata. But, where… where should I be? Why does everything still feel foreign even after I try to get used to it?" Dimas rambled on in frustration. He was confused and lost with every step he took. Like something is wrong in everything Dimas has done so far.
Neither Christian, Dedrick, William, nor the employees who were at the Lawrence Company or the Lawrence Company itself, all felt foreign. Natalie is the only person Dimas feels close to. However, whenever Dimas thought of Natalie, his chest always felt tight.
He felt guilty.
However, he didn't know what he had done wrong.
It was so sickening to have to ask again without getting an answer. Who will answer all of Dimas' questions?!
He needs someone!
HE NEEDS SOMEONE TO ANSWER ALL THE UNANSWERED QUESTIONS!!
Who?!
Who will answer all the questions that are on his mind?!
Dimas's mind is perplexed. He wanted to scream loudly to express the grievances he felt. He needed someone immediately to be his listener. But, who is willing to do it? Natalie was even disappointed with Dimas.
Dimas chuckled bitterly. Dimas has disappointed the people he likes. What will their relationship be like in the future?
"I don't know! I don't know!" Dimas shook his head vigorously. His eyes were red with tears that wouldn't stop flowing.
Dimas's head was throbbing loudly because he was pushing himself too hard to remember what things he had forgotten.
Sick!
Dimas shouted in his heart. He bit his lower lip until it bled to relieve the pain in his head. Dimas's head was about to explode, so hot because the chaos in his mind made Dimas hurt.
Dimas curled up on the sofa, lamenting the pain that tormented him. Again, his head hurt like that time. However, this was much more painful, coupled with the tightness of his chest. Dimas was crying.
Even among the suffering he felt, there was no one by his side. Dimas alone. Even if he has a family, emptiness still exists in his heart. However, the void is slowly being filled since Natalie's presence.
One mistake that Dimas made, made Natalie stay away from him. Natalie refuses Dimas. What must he do to bring Natalie back and relieve Natalie's disappointment?!
"Ugh…" Dimas moaned softly. The pain in his head gradually took Dimas' consciousness. Dimas is not strong anymore. His vision slowly became blurry. Not long after, Dimas fell unconscious.
A tear rolled down from the corner of his eye. His lips moved soundlessly. "I'm sorry, Nata."
***
Natalie returned to her desk after leaving Dimas' room. This time Natalie really felt disappointed with Dimas. How can Dimas' feelings be a mere urge?!
Does memory loss also make the feelings of love that have been for years also easily forgotten?! Natalie has always held on to the belief that even though Dimas has forgotten all their precious memories, at least the feelings of love cannot be lied to and simply forgotten like a memory that is not always permanent.
However, the confession made by Dimas earlier made Natalie even more doubtful about her beliefs. Can she really make Dimas like her like he used to?
What if Dimas's liking is very different from what Natalie wants? No matter how much she thinks about it, Natalie still feels disappointed if Dimas hastily decided that he likes Natalie because he wants to win Natalie right away.
But, from whom? Actually, why did Dimas feel so pressed like that?
"Argh! Why is love so confusing?! Isn't it enough to just say I like you and I like you too, then become lovers?! Getting married, having children, and living happily ever after until death do us part?! Why is the real world more bitter than a novel?!"
Natalie cursed in her heart, cursing her love story which was so complicated and confusing. Natalie's hands ruffled her hair in annoyance. Unlucky! Unlucky! Unlucky! It felt like Natalie wanted to curse someone as an outlet for her anger!
Natalie guarantees that if anyone dares to bother her now, they will become the target for an outlet.
"Oh, look! Who is so frustrated after leaving Mr. Dimas' room, ke ke ke…"
Natalie's hand that was ruffling her hair stopped. Oh, what? Target coming this fast?! When Natalie wants Dimas to immediately recall all the forgotten memories, why doesn't it materialize quickly? But, when she wanted an outlet target, it materialized so easily and in such a short time?!
Natalie chuckled horribly. It's not funny! It's all just as disgusting as the people who talk about it! Natalie's head quickly turned to the side. A devilish grin adorned her face, making her beauty look evil.
"Oh, Mrs. Dessy. It's you again."