Piper's POV
Going home with a newborn is pretty terrifying. Our daughter was absolutely amazing at the hospital. She didn't really cry much, she slept peacefully and nursed from me perfectly. I told myself "Girl, you got this". This is easier than I thought, but I was wrong. Very, very wrong.
Once we left the hospital and arrived home, things changed drastically. Yes, I am glad that I am finally home. Just me and Alex and this teeny tiny baby with no more doctors, no more nurses to assist us. We have to do everything on our own now.
We don't know what to do with this baby, and not just a baby, but a crying, screaming, fussy baby. I wonder what happen to our sweet little bundle of joy? For all I know they gave us the wrong baby and I wouldn't even notice. It's only been a week and I am tired as fuck. Sure, newborns are cute and adorable, but they aren't all sunshine and rainbows. If you have hang-ups or get grossed out quite easily with bodily functions, your baby will cure you of that pretty quickly.
Pee, poop, puke and snots. At some point you will be wearing all of them. On your hands, your shirt, your jeans, even on your hair. Don't sweat it, your baby doesn't care.
I was sleep deprived. They said when the baby sleep, you sleep.
Uh-huh. That probably works well in story books and fairy tales, but not in real life. I mean, how the fuck can I do that when everytime my daughter is sleeping all I can do is constantly checking her if she's still alive and breathing. Much like your former sleep schedule, you can kiss your relaxing meal goodbye. Newborns are eating and pooping machine, with all the stuffs thrown in between feeding and diaper changes. Me and Alex adopt a way of eating in turns or at a run.
I am in a constant state of panic, I worry about the baby and my family every single second.
I look at my child and felt an enormous feeling of guilt, because somehow I manage to bring this perfect little human into the world and I am letting her down with my clumsiness and lack of mommy skills.
Our bedroom looked different too as Alex had to rearrange things to make room for our daughter. I felt displaced and confused.
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The following weeks went by in a sleepless rush and we get the hang of it. Well, most of it and you learn pretty quickly though.
Suddenly we get to do things at our own pace. It can easily get overwhelming. I mean, your life changed significantly overnight, and you are totally responsible for this tiny, fragile new life which you also have absolutely no control.
They said that being new parents can put extra pressure on your relationship with your partner.
I never considered myself lucky before, but after Alex came into my life I became the luckiest person in the whole universe for having such a supportive wife. There is nothing I could ask for more. She's my rock, my shoulder to cry on and my constant companion. Alex, as I said before has the patience of a saint. She never once complained and she's making everything so much better for me.
She cooks healthy meals, clean the house and can still find time to help me with our daughter. While our quality time together may not be the same as it was before our baby was in the picture, we try to be intentional about making time for it. Once the baby settle down for the night we would lazily lie down on the couch and watch crappy movies together. Alex would constantly remind me that the most important ingredient for intimacy is staying connected.
After all, we're always stressed, we're sleep deprived, and we simply can't put our relationship first anymore at least not while we've got a helpless newborn to care for.
"Alex, wake up". I said gently, I found my wife sleeping in the bathtub. How the hell did she even manage to fall asleep in this condition. Her body from the neck down is fully submerge in the water.
She jerk awake,"here's your milk!". She blurted and I burst out laughing.
"Oh it's you. I fell asleep didn't I? Fuck! I am so exhausted" She groaned. "I'm sorry Pipes, did you need anything?".
"No, Bella is sleeping. You should go get some proper rest". I feel so terrible for my wife and the least I could do right now is to let her sleep.
The beauty of having a newborn is a lot of visitors. Our friends will arrive and would bring a lot of food. We always take this advantage to take them up on their offer to watch the baby. This allows me and Alex to breath with a nap, take a long and hot showers, or even find a bit of time to have a quick hot sex.
As the months progress it gets a little bit easier as our baby easily adapts into new routine we set for her. She sleeps throughout the night like a pro and it gives me and Alex time to rest and sleep more.
One afternoon I fell asleep in my daughter's play room while I'm supposed to be cleaning.
"Piper! Come down here quickly!".
Alex was yelling at me downstairs with a sense of urgency in her voice. Fuck! Did something bad happen to the baby? I started to panic and came running down the stairs.
"Shit! Shit! Shit!". I keep mumbling.
"Come quick!". She yelled again.
"Fuck! I'm coming!". I yelled back
I found Alex sitting on the floor in our living room and Bella is plop down on her mat.
I can feel my pulse quickening as I'm trying to catch my breath. My eyes automatically scanned my daughter's body. She's not crying and she seem fine to me. I was confused.
"What happen? Is she alright?".
"Yeah, yeah she's fine". Alex said without looking back at me.
"Then why were you yelling? I thought something bad happened to her".
"What?" Alex crane her neck to look at me. "She's alright, come sit here". She pulled me beside her excitedly.
"Okay I'm confused Alex, what the hell is going on?". I demanded.
"Look at her". She said animatedly.
"I am looking at her! What do you think I'm doing here this whole time?". I snapped.
My daughter is laying on her back when suddenly she roll over on her tummy.
"No way! Alex, did she just?...".
I screamed in excitement. Bella did just roll on her tummy.
"Yes she did! Yes she did! Oh my God, you are so good!". Alex applauded.
Ysabella is now 4 months old and this a new milestone for our family. With having mix emotions and Alex giving me a scare I just burst into tears.
"Hey, are you okay?". Alex asked and pull me in her arms. "What's wrong babe?"
"I was scared... you scared the shit out of me!.. and I'm also happy that she can roll over and I'm sad too that she can do that now. The next thing we know she's bringing home a boyfriend to introduce to us".
"Or a girlfriend". Alex added.
"Fuck! I can't stop crying!"
And yes, before we know it Bella begin crawling. Once she started to move around that's when we start to get on high alert for potential hazards. Even though our house is baby-proof we don't get too comfortable because with babies trying to explore their surroundings there will always be problems, and as our baby grows, new difficulties and challenges arise every month, as the previous ones go away.
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"Alex! Can you hurry up please!". I said as I hammer my fist on the bathroom door.
Ysabella won't stop fussing in my arms. These past few days she prefers Alex's company more than me. Actually that's an understatement, our daughter is obsessed with Alex. She would cry the moment my wife disappear from her sight.
"Piper, I'm taking a shit and if you rush me it won't come out!."
Bella's face turns red, her eyes scrunch up as tears streaming down her cheeks. I brought her downstairs and tried distracting her with some toys and I even attempted giving her snacks but she won't take them.
After a few minutes I can hear Alex footsteps going down the stairs.
"Okay, I'm here". Bella automatically stopped crying the moment she heard Alex voice. Her face lights up and throw her arms forward to reach for her mom. She clings to Alex and wrap her tiny arms around her neck and lay her head on my wife's shoulder.
"There, there. Mommy's here". I love watching them like this together. It's crazy how Bella as she grows up, look exactly like Alex.