With the death of her mother announced, and the funeral over, Qin watched on on tenterhooks, waiting for the other side of the coin to fall. After all, hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.
Yet, if there was one praiseworthy thing about her aunt, it was the amount of effort she put into taking care of baby Yue Qin. As Yue Qin watched on, she started questioning her initial doubts.
Was her aunt's loving attitude truly nothing but a perfected guise? Or was the love she was showered in genuine?
Affected by the feelings of little Yue Qin, she herself started caring more and more for her aunt. That bleeding heart of hers was touched by the affection her aunt gave. The image of her mother and her aunt slowly overlapped.
Yet, at the back of her head, she could feel the admonishment of her mother for forgetting her - Not that she did, because how could she ever forget her beautiful mother?
The years flew by and soon she was 6.
Her Aunt had now become a constant fixture in her life. Every role her Mother should have played was taken over by her Aunt. And although logic warned her to be more cautious of her, her heart screamed otherwise.
Her aunt's constant friendly actions towards her left her bewildered and often pondering on her true motive. Why was she so friendly towards her? Were the woman of this world so open to having their husbands share multiple wives without feeling any jealously? Surely not right? She would castrate her husband if he dared to do such a thing to her.
Sometimes, she felt like she was treated even better than her 3 siblings - or cousins. Honestly, she had no idea what their relationship with her was at this point anymore. But after watching the pure interactions baby Yue Qin had with Yao Yao, Ning Ning, and Bing Bing, adult Yue Qin's heart couldn't help but melt. So what if they had a complicated family tree? Birth did not determine everything. Since they treated her as their baby sister, then she too would treat them as her older siblings.
Of course, that was not all her childhood consisted of. Now that she was 6, she had finally become old enough to finally attend the small school created by the Clan to educate the Clan's children on their culture, teach them general knowledge, and prepare them for their future Classes.
In the culture lessons, they explained her clan's history, culture and traditions. Through them, the bits and pieces that never made sense slowly started falling into place like jigsaw puzzles.
In the general knowledge lessons, Yue Qin learnt more about the structure of the world she was in, Availion, and how vast this world was. She learnt of the Classes, Professions and Specialisations she could choose from. She learnt how to identify herbs and hide herself from trackers to survive in the wild. She learnt about the sciences and magic.
Of course, normal kids would perhaps never have had the patience to pay so much attention. But in a world of magic? There was no choice. There were Musical Priests around to cast magics that focused the mind and help the children study.
As for the children that refused to study or scored bad grades? They would be heavily punished. Corporal punishment was very much real and believed in. There were also Mind Mages Mind who would cast illusions that showed the children the consequences of their actions should fail to assimilate the knowledge taught.
After all, this was no humane world like Earth where there were strict laws and regulations to protect the defenceless. Availion was a cruel world that mixed modern Earth discoveries with ancient Earth ethics.
Strength was the only deciding factor in this world. The strong set the rules while the weak obeyed. A single mistake would not just impact oneself but also the powers connected to that individual. This was why the Clan was so harsh on their education.
Then there were physical classes. During the physical lessons, Yue Qin was made to train her body through running and doing drills. The training was strict and every child had to ensure a certain standard or they would be forced to put in extra training. Yue Qin could see her body growing stronger and fitter with the passing of time.
The martial arts and weaponry classes she attended always left nasty bruises and cuts that caused her great pain. Moreover, having to learn the basics of so many weapons left her with a massive headache. Yet, the instructors would have none of her complaints and she was made to practice them over and over again until she achieved a basic mastery.
This was to ensure they could fight with any weapon, the instructors had reasoned. As such, all she could say was that the lessons had left her with a growing displeasure of the Warrior Class.
Of course, as an onlooker, Yue Qin also acknowledged the necessity of such training. Although painful now, this gruelling training would ensure that the kids would be able to survive better in whatever environment they were thrown in.
The magic lessons were marginally better. During magic classes, the teacher would make them sit and meditate to sense the elements around them. Everything in the world contained elements. Just that some had more elements than others.
Through these lessons, Yue Qin had learned several nifty tricks, such as using her senses to see the world instead of her eyes. She also learnt to sense the people around her, though her range was pathetically small. The teacher also shared with them how to use the elements to sense the emotions of those around them.
Nonethless, the teacher had cautioned them against using these tricks against those more powerful than them because those experts would be able to manipulate what they saw and felt instead.
Then she turned 12 and had to make one of the next biggest decisions in her life.
Sitting in front of the mirror, Yue Qin's aunt slowly inserted a golden buyao into her carefully bunned up hair. "I'm so proud of you baby girl." She sniffed.
"Know that whatever you choose, your fathers and I will always support you. Of course, we all hope that you will choose to remain in the Clan."
Yue Qin turned around and looked straight into her aunts eyes with a cheery smile, grabbing a hold of her aunt's warm palm. "Don't worry auntie. How can I possibly bear to leave you?"
Clad in a traditional green hanfu paired with a white hanfu jacket, Yue Qin stood up from her seat. It was time to leave or they would soon be late. With their palms still interlinked, they stepped out of their courtyard and met with her fathers and her siblings. Then they walked towards the ancestral hall. In the courtyard stood many other clan members all of who were the relatives or friends of those who were about to be initiated like her.
Every month, there would be an initiation ceremony for those that had just turned 12 to make their choice on whether they wanted to swear fealty to the Clan or leave the Clan. In charge of the ceremony would be one of the many Clan Elders. Occasionally, if there was a known genius, one of the 12 Council Members would also attend the ceremony as an honoured guest.
Being one of the participants for this ceremony, as soon as she arrived, Yue Qin was ushered into a room by a fellow Clan Member on duty. There she saw the other children who were born in the same month as her. All of them wore hanfus of varying shades of green. This was because, on the day of the initiation, all of the children were expected to be clad in a green hanfu to signify a new beginning. They were also clad in the same white hanfu jacket which was distributed to them before the ceremony started.
Some of them sat together chatting happily, while others sat alone, silently watching the others. Yue Qin walked to an empty seat and sat down, nervous about the upcoming ceremony. Amongst the children in the room, she knew none of them and dared not start a conversation with any of them.
Then a woman, wearing a pink hanfu with a white collar that signified her to be a Clan Elder walked into the room. Quickly the children quietened down as she became the centre of attention.
"As you all should have been taught during your cultural lessons, you will have to make your choice in the ancestral hall with the spirits of our ancestors as witnesses later. Whatever choice you make, know that we will not blame you and instead give you our blessings. If you still have any questions regarding the process of the ceremony, now is the last chance to clarify your doubts." The Elder paused as her eyes swept diagonally across the room. No one spoke up.
"Good. Then I wish you all the best."
Soon after, the bell rang signifying the arrival of the auspicious hour. All of them lined up and walked into the Ancestral Hall. Then they stood in neat lines at a corner of the hall. At the centre of the Hall, stood another white collared Elder who stood silently with his hands clasped together. Beside him were several green collared disciples who stood subserviently holding trays of cloth.
Surrounding them all were many shelves made up of jaded wood. On the highest levels were tablets that signified the deceased members who had contributed significantly to the Clan while below them were the glowing soul lamps of the important members who still lived. The closer these tablets and soul lamps were to the centre of the room, the greater their contributions were to the Clan.
By then, the family members and friends who had accompanied the 12-year-olds to the initiation ceremony had poured into the ancestral shrine and they all stood respectfully in the Hall, awaiting its start.
One by one, names were called and oaths were sworn. Amongst those that went before her, not a single one chose to leave the Clan.
"Xuan Yue Qin!" The Elder announced, his voice resounding around the quiet Hall.
Underneath her skirt, Yue Qin could feel her legs trembling as she stepped forward towards the Elder.
Then she knelt down on the stone floor, her skirt spreading out as she did so, creating a flower-like image.
"Xuan Yue Qin, from this day forth, do you swear to remain one with the Clan? For better or for worse, in peace or in war, in wealth or in poverty? Are you willing to place the Clan's collective interest above your own individual desires? Do you vow to never forget the graciousness the Clan shows you and return this kindness as long as you have the ability to do so?"
Her throat felt parched and her lips dry as the tip of her tongue darted to dampen her lips. Subconsciously, the two different oaths that she could make which would determine her future flashed past her mind.
If she chose to leave the Clan, then she would say that "I am eternally grateful for the upbringing the Clan has provided me with up till now. However, like a bird that chooses to leave its nest, I too wish to explore the world on my own two feet. With the permission of the honourable Elder and under the witness of the exalted Ancestors, I, Yue Qin seek permission to leave the Clan and forge my own path. Nonetheless, should the Clan ever calls for aid one day, I will try to the best of my abilities to answer the call."
Not that she would of course. Her Clan was her home and her family and she couldn't imagine having to live without it.
"I, Yue Qin swear to remain loyal and faithful to the Clan in life and in death. I swear to uphold the responsibilities and duties expected of me and place the interests of the Clan before my own. For as long as I draw breath and beyond my grave, I will protect the Clan to the best of my abilities."
"Then rise, daughter of the Clan. From now on, in return for your loyalty and faith, we will protect you from all harm and evil. Wherever you travel, take comfort that you may always seek refuge within our walls and that our doors will forever be open to you."
One of the green collared members, stepped forward to help her remove the white jacket while the Elder took a green jacket from the tray and presented it to her.
Under the gaze of the audience, Yue Qin slowly donned the green jacket which symbolised her new position as an official Outer Clan Member.
"Welcome sister." The guy who had helped her out of her white jacket whispered softly.
Watching the scenes playing out before her, adult Yue Qin couldn't help but feel a surge of belonging, faith, and loyalty to the Xuan Clan. Although she couldn't say she had a wonderful childhood due to how much she was forced to study and train, it wasn't a bad one by any means either. She had a loving family that brought her much joy and all her needs provided for. That was what some people would kill for.
Despite the fact that she had lived for many years in another world, after living through this Yue Qin's life from the moment she was born, there was no way she could continue feeling indifferent and separate from her family and her Clan. Everything that this world's Yue Qin had felt, she too had felt. The memory fusion orb didn't just show her the memories of this world's Yue Qin. It essentially made her 'her'.
Philosophers on Earth had debated for centuries on what made someone who they were. Back then, she used to believe that the answer was the soul. Now, she was more inclined to believe that it was the memories. Because now, she finally understood that she was Yue Qin and Yue Qin was her. Although her clan was weird, it was her family and her home. That warmth she felt there was real. And this path of magic she was walking on? She would use it to protect her family. That was what priests were right? They were the best protectors.