"....Why are there three guys in front of her house? Are those her guests? Wait no. They're trying to rob her…!"
Shouta thought, watching the three robbers waiting in front of Ichika's door. One was pick-locking and the other two were on the lookout. None of them saw Shouta, hiding around the corner near the elevator of the apartment.
"How did I get myself into this mess…?"
He asked himself.
If we want to know what happened, let us rewind the time and go back before Shouta arrived at Ichika's apartment.
The train he took was on a route to Ogaki, a city near the Ibi river and Kyoto. The whole ride was empty, there wasn't any conversation and sound.
—He had blocked all sound from his ear.
After explaining everything that had happened between him and Ichika to Koharu, Shouta headed toward the deepest part of Ogaki, and when he arrived at a local convenience store, the sun had already moved far across the sky.
"Now-now, where's her apartment…?"
There were multiple tall buildings, but not as tall as the ones he had seen in Tokyo. Before he does anything reckless, he heads inside the convenience store to buy a nice cold drink.
"Haha, when was the last time I drank this?"
He laughed as he picked an apple juice box from the fridge. The apple juice kindergarteners always bring to their lunch time. But, usually, Shouta would buy these apple juice anytime and anywhere. Even when his friends had enough with the juices, thinking it's for little kids only.
"That'll be 20 yen, please"
"Dammit, that's expensive!"
"I know, man, I was perplexed as well as you as to why apple juices are so expensive. They say that the company has stopped producing these, and that the last few apple juices are only available in Ogaki."
"Wow" Shouta said in amaze, as he put back his wallet inside his pocket. "Anyways, thank you man!"
"Yeah. come back later!"
Shouta ran out of the store and headed towards the west side of Ogaki.
His apple juice made him rethink about embarrassing pasts, and even though he regretted the decisions he made back in Kyoto, he can't do anything else except laugh at his past.
The street lights lit up, lighting the dark road as the sun went below the horizon.
Shouta wasn't really in a hurry, there was still time to talk to Ichika. And if that doesn't work out, maybe he'll try tomorrow. Ichika wouldn't leave him just like that.
He was suddenly overcome by a wave of nostalgia. Was it because he was looking for someone's apartment that he was transported back to his childhood?
"It's just like when I was searching for—"
—For who, exactly?
He stopped in front of a cafe, but that wasn't the reason he stopped walking. Someone had tapped him on the shoulders. It felt like a light tap, a woman's touch.
"Excuse me, but how can I help you—?!"
Shouta fell silent the moment he completed a full 360-degree rotation of his body, the moment he locked his gaze on the person in front of him.
Like seeing an old friend, the person waved and smiled. She was dressed in a high school uniform. So she had probably just returned from hanging out with her friends? Without some mates, highschool girls will not linger this late while still wearing their uniform.
His chest was squeezed, couldn't breathe properly. But it wasn't squeezed by someone, it was a feeling, suffocating him until he breaks.
"N-naka… Na… Ka… Mura…"
The girl smiled again, after looking at Shouta moving his mouth. But she couldn't hear what he said. She could only think and smile, and smile. Only smile.
"G'ooud eph...en-nying, Yama'...guuchi"
Her voice sounded forced, as if she had forced it on herself. She was well aware that she couldn't speak clearly or pronounce her words correctly.
Shouta rolled his eyes down to Nakamura's feet, where marks on her feet, between her feet and her prosthetic leg, served as a reminder of his past.
Shouta clenched his teeth and shifted his gaze away from Nakamura, rolling his eyes to avoid looking him in the eyes. In Shouta's eyes, the person he sees is someone he has threatened. Whom he had harmed. Whom he had inflicted suffering. Whom he had put through a torturous elementary school year.
—The world seemed to have come to a halt, waiting for Shouta to make the next decision. He couldn't, though. He pleaded for someone to assist him, to guide him down the right direction. But there was no one who could rescue him, either inside or outside.
Like the surface of a lake or a river, his eyes mirrored Nakamura's very presence. The water inside him was on the verge of bursting and gushing down his red cheeks.
Shouta caught a glimpse of her warm and happy face. He was overcome with sadness.
—It's too late to make amends.
"...tch!"
Without waving back. Without smiling back. Without looking back at her. Shouta Kazehaya ran like a coward. Running away from his past—
"—gah!!"
He'd grazed his knuckle on a lamp post by mistake. His hand was throbbing with pain, and tears were already streaming down his cheeks. But he kept on walking.
He could sense someone approaching him. He had a good idea who it was. He knew exactly what the person chasing him was up to. However, he continued to drive, clenching his knuckle as he raced in an uncertain direction.
He was inhaling and exhaling as if he were fleeing from a demon. Sweat was dripping down his brow. He'd misplaced his sense of time. I'm curious as to how long he played. How far did he make it?
He wasn't in a crowded or busy area.
It was a peaceful and relaxing environment.
A few people stood on the edge of the bridge, carrying sticks of bread to feed to the koi fish below. The calm wind adds to the tranquility of the environment.
It was as if he was standing in a section reserved for the elderly and disabled. There were more senior citizens present than young adults. Before stepping onto the bridge, he noticed an elderly man in a wheelchair, being pushed by a woman who seemed younger than him.
He wished for Nakamura not to follow him. But his wish didn't come true.
About a minute had passed when he turned around to see Nakamura running up to him from the direction he had come from. She sprinted as if she was running to chase someone.
That's just what she was doing. She pursued Shouta all the way to a bridge in Ogaki, where they met.
She lifted her hand and formed a fist in what looked like her final move. Then she punched Shouta in the arm with a light blow.
Only then she laughed and giggled.
"W-why?"
Did she not hear him?
"Why… Nakamura…?"
Of course, she didn't hear him, or at least just heard a few vague sentences.
"Why are you following me!!"
Shouta yelled, startling the people around him and drawing the attention of Nakamura. Shouta knows what to do after that.
For her to hear him, he has to yell.
"I'm not sure why you followed me here! And why are you even smiling in front of the bully!!!"
It was as though he was confessing to Ichika once more. However, things were different this time.
Now is the moment. It wasn't Ichika to whom he confessed. He's confessing to someone to whom he'd done awful, if not horrible, stuff.
"I'm sorry I made you cry! I was the one who made you sob in agony! I forced you to do things you despise!! I even had you climb up to a spot where you shouldn't have been!!"
People were watching him confess to Nakamura this time. Their phones shone as they raised their hands to take pictures and videos.
"Are you pleading with me to forgive me?! —pay attention! I've grown up, but that doesn't mean you could forgive this unmatured adult!"
—In sixth grade, a young girl attended his classroom wearing crutches, much to everyone's surprise. Her smile was off, no one said everything, and Shouta followed. She staggered and fell to one of the students' desks when the teacher told her to address herself. Everyone else tried to hold back their laughter at that point, but Shouta couldn't. He laughed hysterically at the girl without hesitation, even though Sakura told him to stop.
"Who am I to you! I'm just a doddering guy trying to make the best of a bad situation. But even so, I have still yet to try anything new!! From left to right, I've always gotten away from issues! I've always been cruel to others, doing things that I shouldn't!!"
"Syu' styo… p ich!"
"Even when I committed a serious act of cruelty, I just laughed and joked about it!! —Let me give you an example: your friend Takanashi Ichika became inebriated as a result of my behavior! I gave her the wrong drink, and all I did was laugh about it!"
The people around him were shocked, as was Nakamura. Shouta had kept it a secret from everyone, including his father. Yamamoto, too. His mother, too.
"I overcharged your family for your crutches, and I didn't stop when I threw away your first one!"
Not only throwing it away.
He knelt on her crutches. On the crutches, he scribbled some sentences. Breaking off a piece of it. And, to make matters worse, slicing it in half. Shouta didn't bother to be polite; he was merely attracting the attention he desired.
From Nakamura's joke punch to Shouta confessing his bad deeds. It was a dramatic change in mood for those watching the event unfold.
"Yama' gukchi…"
"You… didn't hear me, did you?"
His loud voice was muffled to her ears, even though she wore hearing aids. All of the yelling and screaming were a little too much for her to take in. She was able to deduce Shouta's words based on his voice and movement.
To not make any weird noises, she gets someone to help her to translate her signs. When she found someone who could translate, she brought him to the bridge. Shouta was still there, crying, leaning on the railing.
"Please, translate my sign to my friend"
The man nodded at Nakamura's request.
"I know what this man's purpose is here. Go on, I'll listen"
Then Nakamura began signing her thoughts to the man, who translated them into Shouta. The man gasped at first, but insisted on continuing to translate without asking Nakamura a question.
"..."
Her words were straightforward and concise.
"Why...?"
Her words were tormenting him in a way.
"...why are you forgiving me...?"
He has earned her forgiveness for everything he has done to her. When she thinks back to the times that she was bullied, it always scares her, but it also serves as a reminder that someone cared enough to spend time with her.
Even though it does sometimes result in a new bruise. Shouta had previously collaborated with Nakamura to reach goals that no one could have predicted. But it still comes back to bullying and another scar after that.
"Didn't I told you I don't deserve your—"
—?!!
With letting out his rage, his hand was yanked by Nakamura and was clenched by both of hers.
"Please…! We're still friends, right?"
"N-no…"
He pondered his thoughts. He is unworthy of friendship. He is not deserving of a happy life. For a brief moment, his mind had changed dramatically, but the old one returned as soon as he saw Nakamura.
Despite the fact that he does not deserve anybody, he has been surrounded by people who love or care for him. He doesn't deserve to be happy, but he is, thanks to his wealth and a girl who really cares for him.
He might not know it yet, but his impulses were not the same as his thoughts. He wanted to live a happy, normal life, but his mind was clouded by cold and terrible thoughts. He wished for forgiveness from all of his colleagues, but his thoughts were clouded by critical remarks about himself.
However, after Nakamura touched and tightened his hand in front of both his and her chests. Shouta knew at that moment that he deserved everything.
The ability to forgive. Joy. Friendships and family. Regret. Someone who is able to stand by his side.
He deserved it all. There are both positive and negative aspects of this.
Is it necessary for him to weep on her forgiving hands right now?
Yes, answered his mind.
He cried—
—and cried—
—and cried—
—and cried— —and cried— —and cried
He cried out all of his sorrowful tears and agonizing cries in Nakamura's arms.