Arman who couldn't speak, maybe he was surprised to see my current situation like this, he looked at me too this body. I don't know what was in his mind. I knew every way to unite with him even though this way. I know this is the worst way.
Arman lowered his head and bowed his body (as soon as my heart beat fast, what does he want?) because this is the first time I've thrust my body round for him, so far we've really dated in a straight line,
apparently he bent down to pick up the blanket and then wrapped it around my body again, shaking his head and closing his eyes, without saying a word to respond to me, I understand he refused my invitation, I was embarrassed and cried, hugged me, kissed this cheek, that's all.
I don't want to give in to the situation, this opportunity will not come again, I hug him back, after all I'm not wearing anything, so Arman's body must be touched by these body problems if I hold him, he won't be able to reject me again, which man will stand it with this kind of temptation, especially alone with the girl his love, I tighten my arms, so that they are closer and closer to each other, limited to a single blanket, I feel his heartbeat, I think his breath is no longer irregular. He must impregnate me right now, then we have to get married
Arman tried to let go of my arms, but I immediately followed him and grabbed his clothes, with a massage, I started to unbutton his shirt one by one from top to bottom. While I kissed the neck of the man with the long leg, and I kissed his ear affectionately, I felt his scented body and I touched it. the skin of his body, I played with my fingers so that he felt amused and carried away by the atmosphere that I created. Arman's heartbeat I felt stronger and tighter, his epidermis also began to warm in my embrace, I myself also felt the blood in my veins rushing, my breath was also excited. Truly I've never been like this before, it was the blows and circumstances that crushed me that caused me to be brave and become wild for this moment.
"Take this body, before that person touches me" I whispered in his ear as I touched my lips on that area deliberately, in a position that was still hugging I tried to remove the blanket again, because I was sure he would not be able to retreat from the passion that I ignited. The blanket fell, he immediately kissed my neck, slowly the entire neck was not missed by him without a pause, so that he looked up helplessly. My man was carried away and heated up with me.
He slowly led me and shifted our position onto his bed that had been made earlier, then he laid this body on his back, Arman prepared to cradle me, Arman's hand which was quite sturdy lifted one of my legs in his kiss and stroked it from the tip of my toes to my thighs,
his touch made my chest tighten and pop, our breaths were chasing each other and sounded out of breath, my lips that were sighing gaping also didn't escape to be kissed and kissed.
After that, he continued to suck and kiss this neck and then arrived at my chest area , these twin hills kneaded stiffly, even though he was still wrapped in trousers, I could already feel the hero was tense, if we were alone in this house, wanted me to scream out louder because I felt the pleasure of warming up with him, I grabbed my hair Arman while burying him in my chest.
On the sidelines of the kiss that continued to strafe my body, my hand tried to reach his pants and pants buttons, I wanted to open it immediately, but ...
Arman suddenly stopped his activities, breathing irregularly and sweat pouring down his body and face, he shook his head again at me, then he collapsed his body, so that it hit my body ... its heavy,
"We can't do this, Baby" he said hoarsely
"I promised to take care of you and didn't want to spoil you." He said.
"That promise was broken when my father broke his promise to you, if you want us to unite, this is the only way.
Somehow I suddenly heard him sobbing
"I want you, Nez, but this is not the way, I also promised your mother last night, to take care of you, mother was worried that we might mess up, this morning I will send you home, I can't take it away. your chastity." he explained while wiping his sweat
"Is that the only reason? If this sin does happen, let my father bear it, don't be afraid and feel guilty. We are like this because of his decision. We want to avoid things that don't happen by getting married immediately, but don't get the blessing, then let it all happen I'm willing to break with you as long as we are
unite" I said as I cried.
Arman... what are you holding on to? I already feel wet. Arman rose from the position that had been on top of me and was now sitting on the bed.
"No! Nez, we can't, this is forbidden, again ... I have two younger sisters. I don't want my sister to be damaged by boys too so I have to be careful. Now let's get ready before my mom comes home, we take a shower. first and ready to go to Surabaya." once again he coaxed me and placed a kiss on my lips again, he took me his shirt.
"Wear this first, if my sister finds out you only wear a blanket, what will she think later, once again, forgive me dear, the wrong way will be fatal for your future, our future" he ordered and immediately took me out of his room.
"Arman? Is there another way? Isn't there? You're not trying to defend me? Help me Arman, what should I do? I'm going to be married to someone else. I don't want to! You said you love me, why isn't there anything? " my tears broke, without warning I immediately crashed myself again in his arms.
"Inez, can't you see? I'm also broken, Nez. Why am I here now? I need strength from my family, but men will not be the same as women, their cries are not wailing like that, if you know my answer, if you don't have faith. A man will I can kill myself instantly when my heart is broken, but I can't do that right?" he explained with a hint of pain in the expression on his face.
"If your father doesn't approve, there's nothing we can do, Inez, elope? let alone get you pregnant? I want to, but there is curse and sin there, we really aren't looking for that right? How can we continue our life if everything is falling apart and destroyed, Nez?" he denied understanding me.
I'm really confused and uncertain, if indeed we can't go this way, what other way can we choose, for me all are deadlocked. What should I do after this, Arman refused my way to stop this matchmaking. I don't want to be separated from him nor will I be able to live my life with another man.