"I love you too, Tadashi, my love" I looked at him with shock.
It all felt like a dream...I heard his voice, I could hear the music, the crowdy, yet peaceful sound of the restaurant, the waves and the darkness of the night. I could hear it! I could hear everything! It all felt so unreal...
"Lu-lucas..." I said as I burst into tears. I hugged him tighter. "T-tadas-" I looked at him and said, "Yes?" I didn't care that I interrupted him. After the look on his face, he didn't mind either.
"Bebe..I-i- how?" He was shocked by the fact that I could hear. "I-i don't know, Lucas." Wow. It was just know when I realised what I nice voice I had.
We kissed once more. We thanked the singer and went back to our table.
I couldn't stop smiling. I could hear. After everything I've beed thru... after all those years I lived in silence. My pain was over. I could finally live happily!
"This is amazing..." He said after we sat at our table.
That was the last thing he said before we both sat in silence. We ate not saying a single word. But it was still nice. I could hear the waves and some birds in the distance, the crowded restaurant, the music, the rather silently screams from the chef in the kitchen.
We ate and decided to leave, because the dinner was not the only thing Lucas planned for tonight.
We were walking down the main road. I had no idea where we were going. A park, a bar, a hidden but nice place in the alley. It could be anything, and everything would have been great. Because I was with him. And nothing will be bad as long as we are together.
We were talking about everything and nothing. About our future, about how amazing it was for me to hear again, about how he wanted a dog, even though he was allergic, about our neighbour, the nice old lady next door who says she loves English tea even though she never tried it and treats us like her sons, who we should invite for some actual English tea from England sometimes.
"Look!" He suddenly said, pointing at a flower shop on the other side of the road. He knew how much I loved flowers. "Stay here, I'm gonna get pick some for you~" He said with the biggest smile on his face. I smiled back, with a little laugh.
He looked at me.I didn't took my eyes off him. He didn't took his eyes off me. He crossed the street looking at me. He didn't see the car. The driver didn't see him. But I did. I saw both of them. I screamed for him to move out of the way. It was too late. The driver got out of the car. The crowd was screaming, people were running on the street. A woman was calling an ambulance. The other few drivers got out of their cars as well. It was all chaos.
And I ?
I ran to him as fast as I could. I kneed in front of him and ripped off my shirt to stop the bleeding on his forehead one way or another.
"It's okay, it's okay, it's okay.." I was repeating to myself, even though I knew it was not. I thought maybe, just maybe, it was all a dream, yeah... a very bad dream that just felt real.
"Lucas, keep it in there please. Please, please don't leave me, please. God please spare his life!" I started crying for so many reasons. I was crying because my partner was dying, I was crying because nobody was helping me, because everyone was just staring at the boy who was trying to save his boyfriend, because the ambulance wasn't there, because I loved flowers so much, because of the driver who hit him, because it was our anniversary.
I spaced back in when Lucas grabbed my hand. "I love you" He said with half a voice, as he put a ring on my hand "If I don't make it till tomorrow..." tears were running down his bloody face "...find happiness, and this..- will come selfish, but adopt a girl..and raise her, like I was her father too..." I was crying harder. "please..-please don't say such words...-we'll get married and adopt a child....TOGETHER...but please don't leave me, not now, not yet. I love you, Lucas , I LOVE YOU WITH EVERYTHING I HAVE..."
"I love you, Tadashi..." he kissed me with everything he's got "...Full-i- love" He whispered that as the ambulance was seen coming down the street. "I PROMISE YOU" I screamed at the top of mu lungs. But it was too late. He couldn't hear me. He died. He died in my arms. The person I loved the most on this earth died in my arms. I felt like the king of the universe, who lost everything he had. I was breaking.
The last thing I knew was me walking down the beach, with the waves touching my feet . They took him away to the hospital, even though it was all hopeless. they said they were gonna call me, but I was really not looking forward to the call.
I was thinking about so many thinks.And It just all went crazy down. I lost everything important to me in a mater of minutes. What happened today, I was hopping it was just a nightmare. But if it was not a dream? What was I going to do next? How will I handle all this pain? Will I truly find happiness? And about the promise...I didn't even wanted to thing of raising a child, OUR child, without him. And I didn't even had a daughter. But it still felt too unreal. What will happen when I arrive home? Home... I lost the only person I could call my home today, so what is the point of calling anyplace "home". I should move. But I can't sell the house. It's too painful. Too many memories that I need to keep alive. Maybe living into another state...Areum. Yes. But what will I tell her? I don't want to tell her or anyone. They will look at me with the pity I don't need. And my hearing, I should probably keep that a secret too. Too many questions I need to avoid.
They called me the next morning, officially announcing his death. Pointless, I was the first to know. His relative texted shortly after. He was never closed to his family. And his parents died not that long ago. He didn't suffer. The only family he got left was his cousin. She was very nice, and always waned to be close to Lucas. But she is married to a Korean designer, and they both moved to France together, 5 years ago. I never met her face to face. But I was with Lucas every time they were FaceTiming. And she seemed nice. She is deaf as well. And she was helping people all around France who struggled with they disabilities, or their friend who too wanted to sign. She knew to sign in a lot of languages French, British, American, Korean, Italian, Canadian and Japanese.
Dely:
I heard the news. I'm taking the next flight to America. (6:37)
Tadashi:
(6:39) Should I take you from the airport?
Dely:
Yes. (6:39)
Tadashi:
(6:42) Text me before the flight
I sat on a stool at the balcony, drinking my morning coffee, when I got a FaceTime call from Areum. I wanted to respond, but then I realised I had red eyes from all the crying and not sleeping. I texted her I was in the kitchen and couldn't respond because the other workers would get mad.
Areum:
I thought you started at nine (7:18)
And I truly did. But I don't think I will be doing that anymore.
Tadashi:
(7:19) I'll call you later. I have to ask you for something very important.
I put my phone down, even though I heard all the dings I was getting from the people who where texting me. Areum, my co-workers, my friends, my parents. Non of them knew. Non of them mattered.
I stretched to get a pack of cigarets from the table and looked at the ocean while the red flame of the lighter was fading away.