I like to be everyone's center of attention and at the same time, I hate it. I hate the way everyone stops talking when I enter into a room or the way they look at me from my toes to my head when I take a walk on the road. I know it is because I'm pretty, like very pretty but still it makes me uncomfortable. Everyone's eyes are always on me, on what I do, what I eat, where I go, who I talk to and who I make as friends. Practically every girl in school wants to be me. I command respect everywhere I go. It's not like I deliberately instill fear in people, but people fear money and a pretty face and those two, I have.
It's Thursday afternoon and I'm sitting in the school cafeteria with my three best friends, Siobhan, Alina and Kourtney. They're already planning the weekend and discussing activities which I'm not interested in, but I have no choice. They wouldn't let me be. I'd rather be curled up in my room, under my duvet reading a romance genre or watching a romantic movie. It's just who I am. They are outdoor buddies, always hyper, the total opposite of who I am but we click, and they make me happy.
"So, my parents would be out of town for the week, yay, we have the house to ourselves. I am so looking forward to the weekend." Kourtney squeals.
Alina's face brightens with a mischievous smile. "We should host a party. We can invite the whole class. It'll be fun. After all, as soon as we enter senior year, we'd be one step closer to saying goodbye to everyone, so we have to make memories." Alina could make selling meth seem like she's saving the world. She doesn't sell meth though. I'm just saying she's that good in persuasion and sugarcoating.
"Sorry Lin, but I won't be available. I have a date with Jarett this weekend. We are going to the movies, to dinner, to the park and I promised his mom to teach her how my nana prepares her red velvet cake." Siobhan says looking sorry but not sorry.
Siobhan is the only one of us four with a boyfriend. She and Jarett have been dating since the tenth grade and are so happy together.
Kourtney turns red. "We're not taking no for an answer. You are coming to the party. You can bring Jarett along we don't care. We need our fourth wing to fly."
She knows arguing would be a waste of breath cause when Alina and Kourtney gang up on you, there is no way out. "Fine. I'd talk to him." they seem pleased with that response.
"And you? "Alina asks me.
"Yeah sure." I say sarcastically. After the way, they shut down Shiv, getting out of this would be hard. Maybe I would have to fake an illness.
The bell rings signaling lunch over and time for another class. We quickly return our trays and head back to class. Biology is what we're having for the sixth period and fortunately and unfortunately, we four are in the same class. It has been that way since forever. We met way before we entered high school. We have been neighbors for as long as I can remember. Our parents have one thing in common; they are rich. That is the only qualification needed to get along in our neighborhood. But I am really lucky in one department, something that makes me better than them, my parents are not shitty. They are the most wonderful and patient people ever. They love my older brother and I like we're what matters most to them. Growing up, I was always falling ill, and the housekeepers couldn't do much to help me, my mom had to quit her job to become a housewife and take care of me. I look at other girls and the nonchalant attitude their parents have towards them and anything that concerns them, and I'm reminded how blessed I am to have mine.
Our biology teacher is rambling off about the body structure of a rabbit and its organs while my mind drifts off. My mind always drifts off. I have this perfect fantasy in my head where I always run off too at every given opportunity. I have a perfect life there, where I'm normal but special, confident and smart and with someone who truly loves me for who I am. Everything is perfect there. I smile in bliss as my mind wanders to my lover who is standing in the middle of a field with a bouquet in his hands waiting for me. The grasses are green, and the weather is warm. He smiles as soon as he sees me, and I run into his arms.
The bell goes off and I'm brought out of my fantasy. Kourtney links her arm with mine as we walk out of class to our next class with the other girls beside us.
"So, will you invite Rémy? I mean he is invited." she asks me which makes me roll my eyes. Rémy is my older brother and Kourt has been obsessed with him forever. Rémy is older than me by four years and is in his second year in college.
"You don't expect him to come to a high school party now, do you?"
She frowns and pouts. "Just invite him, okay? He might say yes, you never know." and then winks at me. I laugh shrugging as we enter the class.
The rest of the class for the day goes by so fast and before I know it, it's Friday and I'm on the couch eating potato chips watching Artemis Fowl with Rémy. My parents are not back from work yet and the housekeepers are in their quarters so it's just Rémy and me in the main house. We both have equal love for movies and video games. Even though we're four years apart, we still behave like twins. I guess it's because it is just us two. When he goes back to school, I'm the saddest because then it's just me at home. He chose a school four hours away from home in New York City. The big city of dreams and hope and all my fantasies. A city where you can be free.
As soon as the movie ends, he turns off the TV and faces me. "What's been going on in school, Chanel?"
I shrug. "Nothing much. Seriously looking forward to senior year so I can graduate already and come meet you in the big city."
He laughs. "The big city is not running away so just focus on school and do well and also have fun. You're only young once."
I slap his arm away from mine. "Stop talking to me like I'm a kid."