Once again, I was dreaming.
Astraea was in front of me.
She was sitting in the comfortable chair while playing a multiplayer game, I don't understand how she complains about losing when she shouldn't be able to play with someone.
She spoke to me once she threw her cat-eared headset against the monitor.
"Looks like you finally woke up the Blut."
"You mean that strange ability you used?"
"Yes. You activated it thanks to your negative emotions, that's the reason 'it' activated as well. The power of deadly sin."
"Razel, if you let the negative emotions consume you, you will be devoured like the previous bearers. Your life will end the day that darkness dominates your mind."
"For that reason, it is time to say goodbye."
"What exactly should I say goodbye to?"
Her words were so strange that they confused me.
The next thing she said, made me shudder.
"It's time for you to stop your little background character game. And face reality."
"You certainly reincarnated as a simpleton type in this world, but... your actions have led you to be more than just a background painted on the wall."
"You've altered a lot of things in the game for your convenience, even if you didn't want that outcome, it doesn't take away from the fact that it's true."
She' s partly right.
For some reason, the protagonist Lily, and Eli's villainess daughter, became my girlfriends. I also kept Cid and Amy from becoming enemies.
I defeated one of the strongest monsters in the game along with Cid, and then with the vampire queen.
I've done things I shouldn't have.
But... I couldn't stop a lot of them from happening.
Because of that, I can watch Lily and Eli converse with a joy that never happened in the game.
Even Lily didn't have female company in the game.
Barbara enjoys seeing how her once indebted household is now debt free and now making millions thanks to that precious mineral mine.
I... want to be a background character for two reasons.
One is so that my alter ego, Litch, won't be discovered.
And the second is... because I don't want people to see me.
Because of that battle against her, I've been having dreams of my former life.
I was an outcast, I was treated like garbage and most of all... I was unhappy.
But in this new life, I have people who care about me and want me to be happy with them.
I want to protect those people and this happiness I gained.
But... because I chose the path of a background character, Evelyn, one of my girlfriends died.
If it had been anyone else... the result would be the same.
"I can know your emotions and thoughts in this state, it wasn't your fault. But, if you decide to keep playing a nobody, is that more people will die, hiding your power is very serious."
"My power?"
"Thanks to breaking your limiters, your magic power combined with Blut has made your magic power level 5. Congratulations, you can give a sword saint a fight, but beating it is another matter."
I was astonished by those words.
"To use Blut you need to imagine that a shield, the strongest shield in the world surrounds your body, that's how you will be able to create the perfect defense. Even if a missile hits you, you won't feel pain or get hurt."
"The Blut turns the cells into something stronger and more resilient than ever existed, not for nothing my blood was special. Now about that shadow."
"You must give up that low self-esteem. It's the only way the shadow can't want to take over you again."
"That might be a difficult thing... after all, just like in my previous life... I'm ugly."
Astraea looked at me with a look of disgust on her face.
Then her right arm was buried in my stomach.
It hurt so much, I want to cry.
"If you keep saying such stupid things, you'll make me kill you from here!"
"... Huh? Can you do that?"
"... I'll put a curse on your body."
Then, a kind of pain in my chest suddenly appeared.
"Thanks to the fact that we share the same blood, I can do that. For that reason, the next time you try to act like a loser..."
She showed me her hand, it looked like she was holding something, she squeezed it a little and─
"...!?"
My heart started to ache.
It felt like a cardiac arrest happened.
"I will crush your heart the next time I see you act like an idiot. Remember that well."
"Now the other thing, thanks to that battle, you've been able to awaken the ability to erase curses. So no matter what things you encounter, you'll be able to defeat them. So you know, stop acting like a loser and be a man."
"This is your black oath. An oath to avoid going back to that life you try to forget, but won't leave behind."
"Looks like that's it, I left you another little gift, but you'll find that out for yourself, goodbye."
With those words, I was swept away by a mysterious force.
What did she mean by that?
◇
My eyes opened.
I could see the sunset falling almost in its entirety.
I lifted my upper body and shook my head.
Nearby I could see Celia with her head down.
She must have been like me because of Evelyn, I was about to tell her when─
"Err... Razel-san, are you all right?"
Evelyn called out to me from the side.
... Hur.
Evelyn is alive... and in front of me.
...
"Huhhhhhh!!!"
It looked like my eyes were going to pop out from this terrifying event.
I was so frightened that I backed up until I hit a tree.
Her clothes were almost destroyed.
Some parts of her underwear were visible.
I asked her in fright.
"... Evelyn... you... weren't you supposed to be─!"
"Please be quiet."
She calmed me down.
"Let me tell you my secret."
❤❤❤
The first time I opened my eyes, a man with a long beard was standing in front of me.
I heard his words as he looked at me while smiling.
"It worked, I did it, this is the best magic invention in the world!"
My eyes were moving in confusion as I didn't understand anything.
I saw everything as very mysterious yet fascinating.
I was naked on a very cold metal bed.
He brought me a blanket and covered me with it.
He helped me down from the metal bed and I stood looking at him with half-open eyes.
"Do you understand me, do you understand what I'm saying? Move your head up and down if so."
I listened to him, but moved it in a very awkward way.
"Okay, that's enough, come on, let me give you something to eat."
As time went on, I was able to understand several things.
That man is my dad, Gregore von Exner, a man of about 58 years old.
And me, I am his only daughter, Evelyn von Exner.
Apparently I am something called a homunculus.
According to the information he gave me from an old book, homunculus were attempts to create artificial humans to replace humanity in case of extinction.
All the projects were failures, except for one.
That one was called a philosopher's stone.
A beautiful red magic crystal.
According to the things I read in the great library, that magic crystal is made from human lives sacrificed in war.
My father said he found that precious jewel in a dungeon he was investigating when he was young.
Thanks to small details he gave to the ministry of magic in this country, he managed to obtain high status and benefits.
He himself told me that all this was for the sake of his research.
He called me "daughter" so that no one would suspect, it seems he wants to be crowned as a legendary research magician.
I am happy for him.
❤❤❤
Today, dad and I are going to celebrate my birthday.
It seems I was born with the appearance of a 5 year old infant.
I'm ten years old today according to my height.
It's just me and dad.
I feel happy.
Happy.
A weird feeling.
Since a couple of years ago, I noticed that my body was going through strange changes.
My face was making weird expressions.
Today I experienced the pain.
I was in the garden of my house, an insect called rhinoceros beetle. It bit my finger.
It hurt so much, I released a sound called a pain scream.
It was creepy, that was creepy.
My dad and I were finishing eating the cake, so I gave him a treat.
According to the social relations book I read, this is an act that shows affection to an individual.
Dad looked strange when I gave him my gift, it was a pendant made from the remains of a gemstone.
❤❤❤
"Evelyn, answer me, Evelyn!"
I had received damage.
I accompanied my father to a dungeon because he needed help.
After a while of investigating, as he was looking for something called "elixir", a potion that can regenerate you age and any mortal wound. We came across a creature called a hydra.
It had 8 heads and spewed fire from its mouths.
It was very difficult to defeat it, but thanks to my awakening an ancient magic called "star magic", we were able to destroy all its heads.
Before it turned to ashes, it swung its tail at high speed and threw me straight into a rock.
I could feel my back, leg and collarbone fracture.
I thought I was going to die for sure.
But something strange happened.
My body began to regenerate from its wounds and fractures.
The moment my father saw me, he hugged me.
I don't understand why he did that.
"I'm so sorry Evelyn! It was my fault! Because of my wish, that happened to you!"
I told him to calm down, that it was all an accident, but he kept hugging me and crying.
... Huh?
Why are my cheeks hot?
I don't understand.
But... it feels warm.
❤❤❤
A few years later, when I turned fifteen according to the calendar.
My father called me into his office.
It was a huge place with books stacked everywhere and important papers on the floor.
As I was going through some documents, he said to me.
"You will take the test for new students at the academy."
That surprised me.
The academy, a place of learning for the future young men and women of noble houses and baronet households.
It was kind of exciting, that. But I had a doubt.
"Dad, why should I go?"
I didn't understand his reason for doing so, but he turned after closing the book and said.
"Because you need to behave like a normal girl. I want you to have a normal adolescence like everyone else. I want you to laugh, cry, make friends and, above all, fall in love."
"Since long ago, I stopped seeing you as an experiment for my future."
"I realized too late, that you were what I really needed. A daughter."
"So many years in isolation in this mansion has made me insensitive, if I want someone to continue my research, I want it to be you. My daughter."
Father's words made me feel something in my chest again, what could it be?
"So, don't be afraid of the outside world, from now on your notebook will be filled with wonders never seen before."
And with those words, my life began for the first time.
Arriving at the academy to give the exam.
I was nervous.
I had no idea how the young men acted, let alone the girls.
I thought someone would find out my secret. If someone knew, it would put dad in danger.
❤❤❤
I finished the exam.
I had plenty of time until the teacher took the exams away.
I was near the window, so I could see outside, then I saw an oddity.
"Aah, I'm late!"
"I shouldn't have stayed up all night playing!"
"Let me in pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
A mysterious black-haired boy was running in a hurry to get inside.
For the first time in my life I laughed.
Then I thought of an oddity.
(What if I walk into his same class?)
The reason for that thought didn't make sense to me. It wasn't logical.
But more to the point... it went against my studies.
I didn't need the score to see that my notes would be perfect.
But... that late student sure didn't study, his clothes were messy and mud was staining the lawn from his shoes.
He was definitely not a good student.
Still... why was I wrong?
I didn't understand. But it was thanks to those scores, that I ended up in the lowest of the academy's classrooms.
A disgrace to my father, but when I told him that.
He laughed. And a lot.
He said. "That's called free will. You chose that path yourself, that's what humans do, choose their destinies. If you did that, it's because you want to get to know that boy more. In my case I was blown away by the first seat's investigations, there isn't a research magician who doesn't idolize that man."
And that's how I ended up in the same classroom as Razel.
My reason for becoming his concubine was because of the things I heard.
He, along with Prince Cidfert, defeated a monster, which, depending on the level of danger, was an SSS without a doubt.
Before that he appeared in a hotel together with Lily-san, a certain Litch guy had attacked that place.
Then he was called by three dukes to destroy secret bases of criminals.
His mysterious appearance in the lawless city and now I find him in this place.
And a few hours ago, we teamed up to take down a black dragon, it hit me and because the philosopher's stone is intact, I can regenerate my wounds.
After a few moments of setting my bones in place.
I watched him getting angry.
Magical power was overflowing from his body, it was a quick and deadly fight.
Razel-san finished the dragon off with one blow, then began to tear his body to near shreds.
The only thing I could salvage from that corpse was its heart.
Razel-san became unconscious after a while.
And now that he woke up I told him about my life and everything that happened.
But there's something I don't understand.
Why does he look angry?
I don't remember saying anything bad to him, so his anger shouldn't happen.
"You idiot!"
He yelled at me. He called me an idiot.
Why?
"Who cares if you can regenerate!"
"Or that you're a homunculus!"
"And even if you were immortal or made of steel! You shouldn't keep quiet!"
"If it hurts, cry!"
"If it bothers you, say so!"
"If you want to ask for help, say so!"
"But don't try to say you're fine after being beaten and having broken bones! Stupid giiiiiiiiiiiiiirl!"
Why?
What she says... it bothers me.
I'm not bothered by her words, but the feeling behind them.
It's weird...
It's as if... he really understands what I feel. As if he knows what death is without having died.
He hugged me.
"You don't need to fight or go out into danger! Just like those two! I'll protect you! Not just you, Celia too!"
"I'll protect all the people important to me! I won't let something like that happen in front of my eyes ever again!"
The same hot-cheeked feeling happened.
But this time, I think I understand why.
This is... happiness.
The happiness of being alive. Of having someone who loves and cares about you.
I... I am happy. I am happy.
Thanks to my father, Celia-chan... and Razel-san, I can be happy even though I'm not a real human being.
Before I knew it, I started crying while hugging him.
❤❤❤
I always saw myself as a selfless person.
I was sitting as I watched Evelyn and Razel, my boyfriend who I don't show affection to, embrace.
Evelyn cried out what she felt from the bottom of her heart.
When I was little, I enjoyed going for walks with my mom.
I loved her very much.
More than my father.
Mom and I were close, but we were closer because we were identical.
My mom was a woman with a slender body and very sensual curves. She would say that, I would just repeat what she said.
We were best friends.
My life until I was six was perfect.
But when I turned seven, that's when everything fell apart.
I was outside my mansion. My parents' house.
I had my bags with me.
My father was holding my hand.
I asked him curious because of the bizarre situation.
"Papa, why did those gentlemen ask us to leave the mansion?"
My father had a pained expression on his face, but he flashed me his best smile to tell me.
"Because... your dad is a bad gambler!"
"Huh?"
"That's right. Your dear daddy, he lost a lot of money gambling. That's why the loan sharks and debt collectors took our house and your mom left. Our relatives won't want us because of my incompetence, but don't worry my child, I'll pull us through!"
We were noble, a family of counts, but debts are the greatest enemy of human beings.
We moved into a small apartment.
One day, when I turned nine, I observed a family out for a walk.
"Gina, leave your brother alone."
"Yes~."
The little girl was teasing her older brother.
I watched them walk down the sidewalk from the balcony.
The father was a huge man. He looked like a bear thanks to his hairy arms and beard.
The woman was small and charming.
"I want some chocolate ice cream!"
"If onii-chan wants one, I want two!"
"Ara ara, looks like everyone wants ice cream today, the little guy in here wants a strawberry one. And you dear."
"Walnut."
The family was happy.
I was feeling a little─ no, I was feeling very jealous.
My father had strange leather clothes with chain mail and metal plates on his limbs, torso and back.
"I'm leaving, watch the house!"
He said that and left, leaving his poor daughter with nothing to eat but instant noodles.
What a lousy father I have.
❤❤❤
Years passed, I became an adventurer.
My father came back one day with a huge scar on his face.
The idiot would end up dead if it wasn't for my help.
I was in the guild, at one of the tables I was reading the menu on what to order.
The food was disgusting as back then the cook was someone else and not the current one.
A conversation caught my attention.
"Hey, again that Leo has gotten himself into difficult missions."
"They may be within his range, but they're the kind you need a group together to complete."
"Well, you can't blame him in part."
"Why?"
"Huh? Didn't you know what happened to his house?"
"All I know about him is that he's a noble from an indebted house."
"Partly, but there's more. It turns out that─"
The men went on talking for a while.
I listened to everything.
Everything they said.
I clenched my fists and bit my lips to keep from screaming.
A while later my father came and asked me if I ordered yet.
I told him I lost my appetite.
❤❤❤
We got home after a couple of hours.
After walking in I said to my dad.
"Dad, do you want to tell me about it?"
"About it, are you talking about the new rifle made of bicorn horn? You see, it's a rare and very good material, so it will definitely come in handy─"
I silenced him with the next words I wanted to tell him for a while.
"It's not that! I want to know what's this about it being my mother who damaged our house! Our debts were that woman's doing!"
Apparently what the men said was that, my mother was a gambling slut.
Yes, she was a vile slut.
She was very fond of going to the casino in the lawless city.
When she didn't have money, she slept with men.
One of the men recognized her since she had won a lot of money and went to gamble, then that woman offered her body to him.
Worst of all, that day was my birthday. She was not present as she said she had to work.
She came back in the morning with a present.
Immediately upon remembering that, I went to my room and started destroying everything that slut gave me.
She ruined our house.
She gave us poverty and debts.
It is thanks to her that my father must risk his life to pay for what her debauchery caused.
I grabbed our family photo, as I was about to tear it up.
My father stopped me.
I looked at him with my face full of anger and tears.
But looking at him.
His face was too painful, he wanted to cry.
"Celia... don't destroy your mother's last memory."
The picture was of the three of us together, we went toy shopping and to the park, it was a nice day.
My father kept talking to me as he hugged me tightly.
"I didn't tell you because I knew you would do this, I really loved your mother, even with the things she did, when you love someone, you don't care about their past. Only their future."
That only made me hate her more.
"Seeing your smiling face when you talked to her, slept together and besides your resemblance, it broke my heart that you were so little you hated her."
I hate her... I hate her so much... she... with the same face as mine did horrible things and had no shame whatsoever.
"Just forget it, live for us and for tomorrow... as long as we are together, our family will not be destroyed."
That just made me feel worse and I started to cry.
❤❤❤
It was the first day of school at the academy.
I sat at the bottom of some desks placed on stairs.
I placed my elbows on my desk and sighed.
It would all be so boring.
It is mandatory that the noble heirs come to study at the academy, whether they are women or illegitimate children as well.
The hours passed and the professors introduced themselves one by one.
During one class, someone caught my attention.
"M-Much pleasure! I am the only daughter of a marquis, my name is Evely─! ... My tongue."
I laughed out loud at how awkward she was.
Looking at her double braided bun on top of her head, she reminded me of a small animal.
When the class was over, I greeted her.
"Hi, how are you. I'm Celia."
She looked scared at me, it made her look like a small animal every time.
She was almost like a little sister you could pick on.
That was how in that simple introduction, I became friends with Evelyn.
❤❤❤
Time was passing and before I knew it, the end of the first semester was coming to an end.
The academy organized a party to give a belated welcome to the students.
I was standing with Evelyn eating at a snack table when it happened.
"I can't stand you anymore Elize, I want to break our engagement this instant!
Apparently something was going on, the ones involved seemed to be that prince charming that one and his fiancé."
Seeing how things were going, I told Evelyn for us to go out.
She heeded me and a commotion seemed to happen next.
❤❤❤
A few days before starting to the second period of the first school semester. I was astonished by a piece of news.
It seemed that prince charming had a duel with his half brother and a weird boy.
A giant monster attacked them.
And in yet another coincidence... that monster was defeated by Prince Charming's half-brother and his friend.
Also that same friend was named as the official fiancé of the duke's daughter.
Also several things about his family that were a secret were revealed.
It is certainly a very rare day.
❤❤❤
My father sent for me today.
I was preparing to go to the adventurer's guild and claim an outstanding payment.
I sat and listened to him.
What he said stunned me.
"Huh? Fiancé?"
"Yes. I got you one. And you'll never guess who it is."
No, no, no, no, no.
Hey, you just got your daughter a future husband.
I haven't even been on a date to know what to do when I'm with a guy!
In this country until not more than a century ago it did not give women rights, but thanks to the first emperor of the current imperial dynasty. It is that the rights for women, including the disabled are growing.
The only ones who don't seem to be given rights are the semi-humans.
It makes me feel bad for them. But I can't do anything about it.
I get along well with the receptionist at the guild who has cat ears. She's even happy when I invited her over for fish once.
But that's not what's important.
"I don't even know who that is!"
"Sure, look at him."
My pare pulled out a photograph and revealed his face to me.
He's a boy who is nothing special.
His face looks like someone you'd see in a crowd and wouldn't remember that you stepped on him by mistake.
But besides that, what's with that expression?
His eyes seem to emit that of a dead fish, is he sick by any chance?
I recognized him, he was a classmate, besides, he's her rumored fiancé.
Really this guy is the fiancé of the duke's daughter?
❤❤❤
I had just met him for the first time.
I tried to introduce myself casually, but he already knew my name and Evelyn's name, who seems to be his fiancé as well.
We are concubines.
He has two girls by his side who look at him tenderly.
One is the famous commoner and the other is the duke's daughter.
I could feel for most of the trip that he was looking at my breasts and my legs.
Of all the girls present, only I was wearing shorts.
I don't like skirts even though they were my favorite as a child. Shorts are better.
And, I don't want to brag, but according to my adventurous friends, I have a nice butt. That gives me points for getting a man.
Although, I'm not really interested in it myself.
❤❤❤
I had just met the duchess.
She looks exactly like her daughter, with the difference of those huge breasts she has.
I swallowed saliva knowing they could get bigger, it was something I didn't know if I wanted. But she looks so young and slender.
Could she be what they called a succubus?
I can't believe she has that figure without a secret.
Princess Elize hugged her.
Her face sank into those huge breasts.
Then came the commoner daughter.
A nobleman adopting a commoner? This family is crazy.
But I'm a concubine, so it wouldn't hurt to take advantage of the opportunities of the good life.
❤❤❤
I'm scared.
The princess and her friend are not normal.
I said a joke about our boyfriend.
And... I'm scared.
The princess looked at me like she was looking at an insect about to be squashed.
Her beautiful ruby-red eyes only made her more threatening.
Her sister, on the other hand.
I'm scared!
Her eyes turned black as night, staring at me.
I felt as if I was being sucked into a void.
The worst thing was the way she approached me, there was definitely something weird about these girls!
But... the worst was not that.
It was that Evelyn revealed to us that she wasn't human.
This is all so weird!
But despite that, I hugged her and said.
"I always saw you as a girl who needs help. So I don't care if you're human, elf or whatever. To me you'll be Evelyn."
The other two said the same thing, though it seemed more like they didn't care if I was.
Before we returned, we befriended a talking dragon.
It was very exciting.
But for some reason, I felt that when I wasn't watching, I was watching in a morbid way.
It must be my imagination since well, it's a dragon and we humans.
❤❤❤
Evelyn was hit by a dragon's tail, we came to this place because she needed help with something.
Razel and I agreed to accompany her, everything was fine until that happened.
Even if I knew Evelyn was going to be fine, I got scared, I went to see her and got a scare.
I could hear her bones returning to normal.
That grossed me out a little bit and I didn't touch her.
I am the worst friend.
I told her I loved her no matter what and now she refuses to take my helping hand.
As I was disgusted with myself. I watched Razel endlessly beating that dragon.
He killed a dragon with his bare hands, even if we attacked him together, we couldn't do anything.
It was amazing how much he was angered by what he did to Evelyn.
It was there that I understood something.
The reason the princess and her friend are so weird is because they saw more than I see.
They have been together since that day, but I have not.
I don't know him exactly.
I don't know what he likes, what he dislikes, let alone what he thinks of me.
I just wanted to enjoy a life full of luxury in a duke's house.
But... looking at this, it makes me think he is someone amazing.
Despite looking simple-minded, he has gotten to where he is by his own efforts.
He will be a future duke because he earned it.
He was knighted at such a young age, a rarity for many.
He just defeated a dragon with his bare hands... and now he was hugging Evelyn.
I heard he said he would not protect.
Despite the fact that I claim to be his girlfriend for my convenience, he cares for us to a degree of suffering as if she were part of his own family.
I... I think that...
◇
Once I finished comforting Evelyn, I realized that night had fallen.
We could not go back as we would be lost. The golem she had was destroyed by the dragon yes we can't even jokingly consider going back.
She can't fly either... wait, there are people who fly?
What a weird world this is!
Anyway... we can't go back until tomorrow morning.
She used a spell that is the magic version of insect repellent, but it scares away monsters and beasts it seems.
I told them to go swimming at a place nearby, I checked it out earlier and it looks safe.
My father and I once camped there and he showed me how to check if the water was safe. I won't tell, it's too nasty.
And just in case, I launched electrical attacks and there wasn't a single sign of life.
So I took off my clothes and went inside to wash up.
It felt fresh all over.
I sat down near a rock and relaxed.
"This is life."
Although my back thought otherwise.
Before I relaxed fully, I felt two presences.
I thought it was monsters and prepared to attack.
I stopped quickly as it was only Celia and Evelyn. I said to them.
"Is something wrong?"
Out of nowhere and without improvisation. They started undressing in front of me.
That took my breath away.
Their beautiful white skin glistened in the sunlight.
Celia's breasts were fully exposed contrary to Evelyn's which were covered by her long hair.
The water was up to her hips, so the bottom was almost transparent to everyone.
They came up to me and hugged me along with the following words.
"Thank you for caring about me and telling me that you would protect me from now on. You are very kind, and also, you made me for the first time understand that even if I can regenerate, the pain is inside."
"Your behavior like your actions are very strange. But I can count on you for any crisis. And you proved that to me just today... that's why we decided it's time to give those two some fight."
They pulled back a little and then one by one for two minutes on the count, they kissed me.
First it was Celia and then Evelyn.
I've built up a lot because of this war and since the lawless city.
I was saving it for Barbara, but they are demanding that I do my boyfriend duties and I will.
In that beautiful moonlight. I did it with my other girlfriends.
◇
I had just woken up.
The sunlight was very bright.
I was in the safe zone that Evelyn made.
My body felt heavy.
But it was because of who I had on top of me.
Celia on the right and Evelyn on the left.
They were sleeping soundly as their heads rested on my chest, their large breasts on my stomach and their legs were clinging tightly to mine.
They slept as if they had never had a good night's sleep in their lives. I would call out to them and they would not wake up.
Since it was still early, I decided to sleep too.
After all, today was the day we would return home for the war was over.