*
"Alright, I'll break air resistance with my Magia retainment in the front. Barius you stay in the middle and try to be aerodynamic behind my air barrier. Just don't stick your hand or foot out or it may get cut off. Neli, you use your gravity to boost us from behind. We may not be able to withstand your second skill... Haha... "
Why am I the leader?!?!! When asked, Barius only laughed it off with 'old times sake'. What do you mean old times sake?!!! I don't remember it at all!! Haah~... I got a little too heated there. With out arrangement on hand, I flew at an unprecedented speed towards central, at least it wa sunprecedented for me.
Perhaps some of Neli's differential movement was the cause of of it, well she was the main contributer to our velocity, so it was highly likely to be her. By controlling the air resistance, I was able to guide the direction we were moving to and bring her usual speed a little high at the same time.
After half a day, we arrived at Central. As we wouldn't want to burn through our well and achieve a fate similar to a crashing car, we used minimal magical particles to fuel our travel, this prevents us from going at our maximum speed but it was still somewhat faster than a plane so it was alright. Evening fell and we stayed at a decent hotel near the outskirts of Central. It was much cheaper too, so it worked out when they had a 3 bed room.
It was not long till we reached the branch office of the Rising Knight Order. Entering the building, the receptionist recognised me and gave a little wave as I approached her.
".... What s...seems to be the business today??" (Receptionist)
Was it just me? Or does she seem a little scared out of her wits? I wonder what she's afraid of, but it wasn't any of my business so I smoothed it over by continuing the pace of the conversation. I cleared my throat once which she reacted to by jolting.
"I'm here to look for Myuu, Gerald and Paridia."
Letting go of all pretense, I spoke my mind with a clear and serious intent. There was no time, they're all magical girls, they move extremely fast especially as A grades. Paridia isn't as fast as the other 2, but they could simply carry her as they ran.
"They left a while ago... You guys left together, if you seperated we won't be able to find them immediately." (receptionist)
"Immediately? In other words you can still find them after a while?"
Latching onto her words, I continued to push forward with my words. I can't give up... Not after getting this far. After fighting that hooded figure, I realised I was in too deep. There was no running in this world. It was only kill or be killed. Who else could save us magical girls but ourselves? The progenitor caught on to us, that's why I know they are in danger. They may get caught by a trap, or have enemies with bad synergies with them prepared.
A classic example is fire and water. Will water put out the fire first? Or will first evaporate everything into steam? Directly opposing powers like that don't bod well for both parties, at that point it came down to their will stat and their well stat to decide which is superior. I have Magia retainment, it is the only thing evening the playing field. But that is assuming my opponent's are A grade. One day, when I have to fight a S grade, even that little crutch of mine will be gone.
I have to adapt, if I can't grow stronger by training up my augmentations, then I'll have to find a new technique that boosts my physical being. Or even a super cool technique like Barius' time stop, so that I can circumvent the problem of stay differences... Well, Barius' time stop is just the effect of her skill. What a cheat! How cool was it for he to utter 'time stop' everytime she used her skill! Well, I tried to make a pseudo version of it and had my share of acting cool. Maybe I'll find something better. After all unlike her skill, my 'time stop' was recreated through other factors like movement itself, as the effect is not direct the magic conversion efficiency is atrocious.
"it'll take a few days, at that point I'd advised to begin the search yourself using your radar." (Receptionist)
Her crestfallen face felt like cold wind brushed against my cheek, I observed her expression and the advice seemed to be given in earnest. Alright. If there's not much you can do, there's no point pestering you.
" okay, thank you for your help."
"Mhmm. Good luck on your search." (Receptionist)
Saying our farewells, I headed in the direction of where I last left them. In the direction of Amony's house. I knew the direction just by the familiar scenery, after all I was chased away cruelly from this direction. Brushing off my mixed feelings, I trudged onwards this path... Now that I think about it. Sooner or later, Barius and Neli will find out about my missing memories. Should I tell them now? Or should I leave it for later?
My indecisiveness forbids me from deciding, though that isn't much different from the latter. I do not see the future, but I can predict such a likely outcome. I hold up both my hands, observing every inch of it as if a clue would fall from the sky and land directly in them. A miraculous crutch, a faint delusion. Naturally Barius calls out to me and I closed my palms with a tight grip. I can't feel them.
"K... Kaori! You've been acting weird... Since you returned. If you have something you need help with, just ask." (Barius)
"Then I'll be honest.... Right before I came back, I lost all my memories."
As if she was suffocating under the entire weight of the ocean, her eyes widened in unadulterated surprise. Her blood rushed to her head as her veins budged over her temples and her thoughts flew at unobservable speeds.
"Let me at least ask a few questions. You're undeniably strong, and your skill is the same as hers. You're Kaori right?" (Barius)
Her eyes narrowed, her cheeks stiffened and her posture changed to that of a battle ready one. Her palms rested on her waist, her centre of gravity slightly lowered by the subtle bending of her knees, it seemed all warmth had escaped from her gentle expression leaving behind nothing but a cold hard mask.
"Yeah I'm Kaori. That's for sure. Even some aspect of her personality stuck through the memory erasure, and I somewhat behave similarly to Kaori but with a few set differences."
"How did you find out about it?" (Barius)
"Myuu was there to tell me everything I needed to know."
".... Where is she?" (Barius)
"... We had an arguement and I got chased away..."
Her cheeks twitched as realisation fell on her like a bomb. She breathed a deep sigh and struggled to finish as if something was sucking air out of her lungs. Her apprehension visible on her face, doubts had formed countless cracks in her composure, her breathing gradually becoming more raggard.
"This whole time?" (Barius)
"... This whole time..."
The entire way through the conversation we were met with silence from Neli. She simply looked somewhere else as we spoke, as if it was someone else's problem. Her disinterest leaking through her drooping eyes, she crouched down to play with the plant life nearby. Meanwhile, Barius was the opposite. She was livid, I mean anyone would be after getting tricked.
That was when Neli finally spoke.
"... So you brought us to fight back against Myuu? If she's stronger than you, even we would have trouble." (Neli)
"..."
Annoyance painted over her previous look, however her eyes seemed to still be drooping as if she was still expressing her boredom. It was not an exaggeration to say she had such a condescending look right now.
"You're not mad?"
Her annoyance reverted back to her disinterested look. She pointed her middle finger before replying.
"Couldn't give a rats ass about it."
So she was mad after all! Then... What should I do... I couldn't help but look down in worry and anxiousness. I knew that I had to eventually tell them, but actually doing it was so much more painful than just knowing I had to do it. Just how do I muster a way to move past this...
"... Tch, it's that look that's annoying me. You tricked us, you went and lied to our faces without so much as a single speck of guilt, likely because you felt like you're different from Kaori herself. So it's her problem and not yours right?" (Neli)
I grit my teeth and tightened my grip on my fingers, the tension squeezing around my knuckles. I agree, I agree with the assessment that I feel like a different existence, no I am a different existence from Kaori. But to presume I felt no amount of guilt at all... It boils my blood. It rots my insides, it rots my mind. This guilt, this terror that claws at my conscious. I want to be free, but I will never fulfill the role of Kaori.
Look, even if I feel like a different existence, I pity those who knew her before. I could never fill in that gap that they now have, it frustrates me that I can not help them. Even if I feel that it was Kaori's problem, inheriting her body, her power, her magic, I wanted to at least give something back. To someone who's basically dead, to some who took my everything but is also my everything.
With a person I cannot fight, I cannot cry in frustration to, I cannot vent my anger on. With Kaori, all I can do is seek to understand her and help those she left behind. Was it guilt? Or was it a sense of duty? All I knew was that this consuming feeling binds me down, impeding me from enjoying my life. What else what I suppose to do...?
"... I can't ignore how you put it like that, as if I got out unscathed... Did you think it was easy living while being treated like a disabled person?
The grievances that people had with Kaori were taken out on me, the pain that they feel I empathised. I suppose it's karma for trying to be so selfish. "
"... Then don't let it stop you. I never met Kaori, so frankly I'm the selfish one who treats it like someone else's problem. But you, you're every bit involved.
So you should stopped taking it out on your own feelings. If you really want to move forward and help others, then stop looking back. Stop thinking your memory loss is a disability, stop pitying yourself when others do it enough. Lastly, if you have the audacity to lie to Barius, don't act defeated so easily. Go through with it, let your selfishness run its course. "(Neli)
"..."(Barius)
While she still looked a bit furious, she didn't say anything to protest against it. Her silence was a little confusing, but perhaps she was waiting for my move. Then-
A crooked smile adorns itself tantalisingly on my face. My heart beats faster forcing my thoughts of my mind, I grip my fist in front of my myself as I faced Barius head on.
"Let's make a vow."
"Sure, what is it?" (Barius)
Her expression softens as she looked me straight in the eyes, the faint glimmer in her iris lights up as her expression gradually shifted.
"I vow, to have the resolve to fight."
"I vow, to be the perfect magical girl." (Barius)
Going with the flow, she spoke off the first thing that came to her mind. She held her fist in the same way and positioned it in front of her. Clashing our forearms together, a small shock wave spreads out. Without noticing, a beautiful smug smile had crept up her cheeks, her competitiveness had been set alight and her excitement flared.
Releasing our each other's arms which were locked against each other, I walked past them with heavy footsteps.
"I'll stop running. I'll fight for myself and no one else. If there is no need to pity myself as you said then there is no longer any need for me to help others. From now on I'll fight for my own wishes, and I'll win."
"Big words for a mere rival, I'll make sure you know your place." (Barius)
We continue heading towards the next nearest base of the progenitor's cult.