*
"..."
"..." (Barius)
"... Barius! We don't have time for this! What did higher command say?!"
She looks down on the ground, her hesitation on full display for everyone to see. Anyone could observe that she was racked with a hard choice. She continued to speak, like a machine forced to continue working.
"The two choices are-" (Barius)
"I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE OPTIONS! What I want to know if your decision! This is NOT my place to decide!"
Her neck cranes back up blankly, her expression dumbfounded at the circumstance brought upon herself. She grits her teeth hard, putting all her strength into making a decision. The ridge between her brows creased intensely with her forehead wrinkles as her knuckles tighten their grip to the point of whitening.
"KHHhhhh....! You! Kaorin! If I send you on a suicidal mission, would you agree to it? Would you stake your life with an abysmal chance of surviving for a chance to obliterate the enemy's formation?" (Barius)
' I hate it. Relying on her. Even now, even just now. I practically begged for her help. Just why did I feel like relying on her? Was it because she was originally the leader? Or was it something else entirely?
I hate it. I hate this! I hate whatever is happening right now! Everything is getting in the way of my growth, my journey closer to perfection. I feel mad, uncontrollably so. It feels like my teeth are grinding itself to dust as my temples flare up. '(Barius)
'... So she's still relying on me. It was a half success I suppose. Forcing her to think for herself, she had stopped being indecisive, but she still pushed the responsibility to me. '
"Fine. Our unit will be behind that task. From what you've said, there's still a chance to survive right? As long it's not strapping us to a bomb, it should be fine."
"... Yes. Everyone else , work with existing units if you have to. Now there's a second chance to change the tide. Wait until the center of their formation is destroyed and you'll push with that momentum. I'll hand over command to another sub unit leader "(Barius)
" Ho~? Commander-San wants to join us in our suicide charge? "
Feeling skeptical, I raised a single brow as I question her resolve. At this point, I wouldn't mind dying for the faction. Even if it was a cold and cruel place, it was my home. If I could contribute in some significant way, I would be satisfied in the end. Of course, this all assumes that I don't have the ability to survive. Most of all, I'll put faith into my own power and my comrades. They're all powerful in their own right, having come this far.
We were a sub unit of 10. It consists of me, Myuu, Vibell, Izumi, Fiel, Barius, Garion, Kenzi, Usaimi and Xin. Usaimi and Xin were 2 of the few that were sent back early to collect information from our faction, during the time we stayed in Illnoia.
Barius's face stayed unchanging, not a single one of her muscles twitch as her gaze locks onto mine. It was like we were trying to peer through each other's soul, if an intense gaze can burn we would have melted each other's face off.
" I have that responsibility, as your leader. "(Barius)
"... ... Let's go. "
It was not a reason that was unheard of. I even used it myself as an excuse. It was the right decision too, seeing how powerful Frena was, my participation in that battle against her was a right one. Once we flew to a far enough distance of more than 10 buildings away.
Activating [Stick], configuring mana route. Optimise magic stability, ready camouflage. Operation ready. 2 jett Black horns manifest on the sides of my hair, nearer to my back.
"Kaori... That's..." (Xin)
"What the hell?!" (Usaimi)
"Already... Huh." (Barius)
"As expected!" (Myuu)
"... Seriously?!" (Garion)
"Wow." (Kenzi)
"Damn... A Stick? How did you get your hands on one... " (Izumi)
"TCH!?!, why do you get such s cool thing first?!???!!!!!!!" (Vibell)
"..." (Fiel)
"Compound technique-Giant buster magic rail cannon. The moment I activate this technique, you guys have to shoot your strongest attacks at it. I'll count down to make it easier. You guys understand? It's a combined attack that gathers all our attacks and shoot it off as a white beam. "
" Does that mean it has no power on its own? Even though it has such an intimidating name? "(Kenzi)
" No, it does have power of its own. But the main function of its existence is right before our eyes. It's gathering power from the surrounding wind and particles right now. It'll gather your power too and shoot at my command. I'll be activating in 3."
" Everyone, get ready! "(Garion)
" 2!!! We have to make this quick or we'll get detected!! "
" This is the final stretch! If this ambush is a success, we win! POUR IN ALL YOUR POWER!!!!!! "(Barius)
" 1!!!!! ACTIVATE!!!!"
"Base technique! 60% charge, [Clean cleave clatter]!!!!" (Izumi)
"Super charged gyration meteor, [Geoprincess]!" (Fiel)
"Relieve it of the burden of matter [Concealing air]." (Vibell)
" Rend, annihilate all that's in front [Second step to completion]" (Barius)
"Seethe, cold awaits those who are late. [Indifference engulfs the coin]" (Garion)
"I hope this at least helps a little... [Enhance sense]-magic." (Kenzi)
"[Azure strike], toast everyone for me, will you?" (Usaimi)
"Base technique + overload [Gravity strike]!" (Xin)
"Uhhh... Sorry, my skill isn't energy based and I can't support you either unless you get hurt..." (Myuu)
"Compress!!!! FIREEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
As everyone's attacks converge at one point, it seemed like an invisible force around the area I indicated wrapped around all the attacks at once, before squeezing it into a smaller palm sized ball. Less than a moment later, a beam of bright light fired from the opposite side of me, facing directly away from me. It engulfed everything in the way and it's momentum was strong enough to push us all back. The recoil was so high, I was afraid it would explode on my face a few times. Thankfully, Kenzi's skill enhanced my sensitivity to magic, making the fine tuning and detailed magical particle manipulation easier to handle.
Everything was brought under by the pressure of the blast alone let alone the heat and radiation it gave off. It was barely controlled by itself which was guided by my power to prevent it from leaking an explosion next to us. It was like a volatile orb of gas that would explode if it interacted with the air. Other than the loud sound it gave off from quite a distance away, it actually travelled fast enough to outrun any of us who were here. Needless to say, it wreaked chaos all over the enemy formation. While our allies were somewhat aware due to their superior information gathering in their won territory, the invaders were not so fortunate.
Save for about 30% who ran into the air above, most of the centre formation units had been vaporised. The rest of their formation was closed in on, after the massive attack that tore them apart, their remaining commanders made the quick decision to retreat. While we suffered minimal losses less than 10%, their central units lose 70% and their wings lose 30%. Those that retreat now only number 8 and a half units.
"... Now we've done it. We fended off their attack for today. But in a couple of days, they will bring their full force. Including the 20 backup units they have. We've spent too much magical particles fighting off this weaker wave. Do you think we'll be able to win the next one? "
Once again, she had a difficult look. Her light grey hair was slightly singed by the earlier blast, it flowed back following the breeze. Barius Kleine, once again made such an expression. But before the others noticed, she switched up in an instant to her usual face. An air of authority returned back to her, though it felt superficial for me only.
"We'll have to prepare and fight harder than ever. We'll be receiving a backup of about 6 units from central tomorrow. We'll still be outnumbered, so we need Friedra's help. Myuu, could you go heal up Friedra as fast as possible? I suspect the enemy generals have their own healers as well..."(Barius)
" For the rest of us... Let's rest up for today... "(Garion)
" Alright, I think I ran around too much trying to dodge today. Even teaming up is still dangerous... "(Kenzi)
"... "(Fiel)
"You okay? There's likely an even larger battle tomorrow, and that large attack you pulled off may get you into a disadvantage. You don't recover that kind of massive attack in a day." (Myuu)
"... Well, it's alright. I've always been in a disadvantage in important battles like this. It would be even more strange if nothing happened to me.... "
"... Hahah! I don't understand how, but it's at times like this that you seem very reliable. Even if you are currently weaker than everyone. I'm more amazed that you don't seem afraid. "(Myuu)
An undescribably feeling. It was neither warm nor cool, but merely disarray. My brows knitted really hard for an instant as I rouse my mind to try to comprehend it as fast as possible. I put my left arm over my forehead to hide the wrinkles forming, and ultimately gave up. For some reason "don't seem afraid" just did not sit well with me. A hazy fog surrounded my thoughts on it. In that way I guess it was clear. Why else would it be confusing for me other than the fact that it was simply wrong?
I am afraid. Deathly afraid. I simply don't let it show. Because if other people see my fear, I'll see it too but reflected in their gazes. I hate it. I'd never want to see something as ugly as that. In any case, pretending to be brave was always the easiest way to handle it. And after a while, it won't be mere 'pretend' anymore. It'll be a complete mechanism that shields you reliably.
I can't run from my problems at this point. But how detrimental would it be to be afraid of facing my problems? I must first trick other people, then myself. So I will continue to do so. This is how I move forward, I won't let anyone take this from me.
Without noticing, I had subconsciously walked in the direction of my home. Myuu was silently following behind me. Did she notice? That would be too painful. Turning around, a smile naturally returned to my face as I looked at her face. Was it a reflex at this point? Or was I genuinely happy? I think it leans more towards the latter. Strangely enough her presents does calm my heart like mine does for hers. But it's simply too embarrassing to tell her that.
It would be bad to do so at this point in time anyway.
"Let's go back home and rest lots!"
"Mhmm!" (Myuu)
She lost her home and her mother. I'm afraid if I told her 'I need you' or something along those lines, it'll mess up her mental state further. I'd rather she obsess over revenge than develop an unhealthy reliance on relationships like the one we have. Of course the most important decision is hers to make in the end, by keeping this distance between us, it would leave her decision making untainted.
Arriving home, the place was dimly lit as the lights were off. It was a small apartment with a kitchen and living room in one room, and a bedroom with a toilet. A total of 2 rooms excluding the toilet and shoe area. The shoe area was a small portion of ground sunken below the floor level by 1 step. As its name suggested, it held the shoe rack where any shoes or sleepers go to when one enters the house.
After leaving our shoes or heels, we took turns taking a shower before going to bed. As there was only a single bed, it had to be shared. We slept on the 2 sides, left and right. Turning towards my side, I whispered a soft goodnight before leaving to where my dreams took me. It was a similar feeling to fainting, yet it wasn't. Unlike such occasions, I wouldn't resist closing my eyes and instead slept rather peacefully. Until...
"... -ri, you awake?" (Myuu)
".... I'm a light sleeper. I suppose you woke me up a moment ago."
".... Hey, Kaori. Why... Have you been so nice to me." (Myuu)
"... Who wouldn't be nice to someone bright and positive like you? You were nice to everyone else. I just happen to get to you first. Ever since that day at least."
"... I'm not stupid... "(Myuu)
"..."
" I know how you feel. Maybe not when I first saw my home collapsed... But I understand what you're doing a little... " (Myuu)
"..."
"... When the time comes and you need help instead. Please don't hesitate to rely on me. You're friends and I, believe it or not still have faith in you.
Even though you end up in a weakened state a lot, you managed to make an impact on all our hearts. A decently strong impression that wouldn't go away. A good leader. A rival. A respectable leader. A cherished friend... "(Myuu)
" I.... I'll try my best. "