The ground stopped shaking. I breathed out. My heart started beating again. I did not know how long this sudden chaos in the nothingness had lasted. The Simurgh was still sporting an angry look in its eyes, but at least the rage was no longer spilling outside its body.
"I'm sorry!" I said quickly, still unable to move my body.
"Your apology is accepted," said the Simurgh, its voice booming and echoing around the nothingness. The Simurgh closed its eyes. When it opened them again, its voice was back to normal. "The silver moon is not a being of this world. He is, apart from you, the only being in my reflection who is not a part of me."
"So he was an outsider after all," I said.
"Indeed. Some of the stories made by the beings in my reflection were formed from the truth that I was facing. The unfortunate truth. You see, dear Caspian, the silver moon has been pursuing me for eternity," said the Simurgh.
"Pursuing you? You mean, like, romantically?" I said.
The Simurgh chuckled. "No, child. What the moon feels is not love. He is a being driven by greed and curiosity. Perhaps also a little bit of, what was the word your people used, ah yes, masochism."
I raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure he doesn't like you? He sounded like a crazy stalker the first time I met him. He grabbed your feather and everything."
The Simurgh's eyes widened. Inside, I saw Kelser fighting against an eight star demon and Kol firing a spell from atop Paris as hordes of beastmen ran back into the temple for cover. "That feather was a representation of some of my powers. When I met you for the first time, I was recovering from my battle with the moon and red star. They attacked me after I provided the power to summon you to this world. Truly, the silver moon has been using you against me since the beginning."
I frowned. "So you lost some of your power to the silver moon? I'm sorry for leading him to you that time."
"It is of no concern. The silver moon's Ikon, your friend Noel, seems to have already told you about the way our magic works in this world. The three Immortals, as you call us, govern concepts or domains. The silver moon governs madness, music, love, and much more. The red star covers evil, prose, physical pain, among others."
"And you have birds and songs?" I asked.
"Among other things," said the Simurgh. "Like justice, order, kindness, and rationality."
"I see, kept the best ones for yourself, didn't you?" I said.
"It would not be appropriate to give my evil servant too many domains, no," agreed the Simurgh.
"But it doesn't sound like you gave Madn—I mean, the silver moon, anything. How does he have so many domains then?" I asked.
The Simurgh sighed. "As I mentioned to you before, the silver moon was an outsider. I do not know where he came from but as soon as he landed in this reality, he sucked up several domains for himself. I noticed his arrival immediately, but I was weakened since I had just created the red star, giving him some of my own domains. I had also sacrificed certain powers to create this reality in the first place. By the time I had regained my strength, he had claimed the silver moon and laid claim to love and the void."
"But you said that world was your reflection. Shouldn't you be able to control your reflection? This state you're in, inside this nothingness, shouldn't you be able to do something to yourself here that would make you stronger in that world?" I asked.
"If only it was that easy. No, Caspian, the silver moon has embedded himself deeply into that world. It takes nearly everything I have just to keep those two loose cannons from destroying everything. The only way I can interfere in my own reflection is by letting them take bites out of my domains or increase their own power over another unclaimed domain," said the Simurgh.
"So there are still domains the three of you haven't claimed," I said.
"Indeed. Some of them, I had to cut off of myself when creating that world. The rest came about thanks to the creation of the world itself. The silver moon and the red star look ravenously upon those domains, seeking to increase their power and influence. And this Book of Annihilation guarded one of those domains. Thankfully, it seems you were able to rescue it before the ceremony was completed," it said.
"Let me guess, it covers the domain of annihilation? So like, death and destruction?" I said.
"Close," said the Simurgh. "The red star already governs the state of death, and the silver moon has some control of destruction, although it is not complete. Annihilation is worse than that. Annihilation is total and complete. It is the act of killing, the state of being destroyed, and much more than that. If the silver moon had finished the ceremony, he would have gained the ability to destroy the world and grant himself what domains remained. Then, he would have attacked me."
"Annihilation would have let him destroy you?" I asked.
"No, worse," it said, "the silver moon would have crashed into me in this nothingness, finally breaking through the void and entering my divine realm. Then, he would have annihilated himself in my being."
I blinked. "That sounds like suicide?"
"It is," said the Simurgh. "Or rather, you already know what it would be like. You found this meaning somewhere among my subconscious."
"You mean the stuff about becoming a part of something? Like, annihilating yourself and merging with something else. Wait, he wanted to become a part of you? He is a creepy stalker after all," I said.
"I do not follow your logic, but yes, that is what he wanted to do," said the Simurgh. "But you stopped him, and for that, you have my gratitude, Caspian Holm."
I accepted the Simurgh's gratitude and we talked a little while longer. I wanted to know if I would be allowed to go home now, and the Simurgh asked if I was not happy here. I told it I had found some semblance of happiness thanks to the friends I had made along the way, but I still did not feel like I belonged. Earth was my home. I found myself missing things from back home all the time. Food, friends, even television. These things might seem shallow to someone as powerful as the Simurgh, but homesickness is a terrible thing. To feel rootless and alienated is not enjoyable. There is a reason exiles and refugees talk as much about alienation as they do about persecution, and why immigrants from different countries try to remake portions of their home culture where they go.
"Very well, Caspian Holm," said the Simurgh. "I will help you return to your home after you have done one more thing for me."
"Isn't stopping the destruction of the world enough of a favor?" I said.
"I cannot send you back before I have recovered this domain. My powers are simply not strong enough. Or rather, I should explain, I could send you back to your world, but without this domain, I do not know if you would like to return," it said.
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"Do you remember what happened after the first time we met?" asked the Simurgh.
I frowned. "Yes. Madn—the silver moon came and talked to us for a little bit. After he was done, we left your tree and found that the land around us had been destroyed. After a while, we learned that we had been sent into the future."
"Precisely," said the Simurgh. "One of my most powerful domains has been split into three. Time, Caspian, time. If I do not regain control of time, I cannot send you back to the correct time on your world. You might end up turning to ash in your primordial atmosphere or your loved ones might have long since perished by the time you return. If I am to send you to the appropriate time, I must regain my domain."
"That does explain all the time shenanigans," I said. "Alright, I can see why it's important, but how am I supposed to do that?"
"The same way you recovered Annihilation. You must steal the Book of the Present from the silver moon and the Book of the Future from the red star," it said.
"And where am I supposed to find these books?" I said.
"In the same place you found the Book of Annihilation. On the person of the Ikons of the Immortals," it said.
"You're saying I need to get them to turn into pages again?" I said. "I don't even know how they did that in the first place!"
"You do not need to worry about that. I will give you the ability to make them reveal their Books. You simply need to incapacitate them so they will stay in one place long enough for you to read the words. Oh, and do not kill them, or you will not be able to read them," it said.
"Got it. Defeat Noel and Alek, turn them into pages, retrieve the Present and the Future, and you'll send me back to my world and time. That sounds like a plan!" I said.
The Simurgh smiled. "I am glad we are of one mind, Caspian Holm."