Chapter 14 - EPISODE 14 - Intervene

May 7, 20XX

8:00 AM

It's Friday, and that means there definitely must be some extra activity after class.

Kibe: Hehehehe.

I should stalk them.

4:00 PM

*At the school gates*

*The four Slice-of-Life Boys are outside the school gates*

Yoshida: Hey Ishimoto, can you tell me a joke? A good one.

Ishimoto: What do you call a table which doesn't have any legs?

Yoshida: Uh... What?

Ishimoto: Dis-tabled.

Yoshida: ... Corny.

*Arata and Hara both look at Yoshida*

Arata: What did you say?

Yoshida: Did I say anything wrong?

Hara: YES YOU DID! *points his finger to Yoshida* YOU VIOLATED BROTHER CODE #1!

Yoshida: Wha- WHAT EVEN IS BROTHER CODE #1?

*Arata and Hara are in shock*

Arata: How dare you... IT'S TO ALWAYS LAUGH AT ISHIMOTO'S JOKES!

Yoshida: You guys just made that up didn't you?

Hara: YOU TAKE THAT BACK! OR WE WON'T BE FRIENDS ANYMORE!

Yoshida: Fine, fine. I take it back.

Arata: NOT ENOUGH!

Yoshida: What else am I supposed to do?

Hara: LAUGH!

Yoshida: Uh... haha?

Ishimoto: ...

Hara: ARATA, HE'S MOCKING THE ACT OF LAUGHING!

Arata: LAUGH LIKE A TRUE MAN!

*Kibe is watching in the corner*

What on Earth are they doing? They won't give me a chance to intervene.

Yoshida: HA HA?

Arata: MORRRRREEEEEEEE! LAUGH LIKE A TRUE MAN!

Yoshida: AHAHHAHA?

Arata: DON'T QUESTION YOUR OWN LAUGHTER! AND YOUR OFF BY A NOTE!

Yoshida: AAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHAHHA!

Arata: MORE! LAUGH LIKE A MADMAN!

Yoshida: AHAHAHHHHHAHHAHAH! *hysterical laughing continues*

*Click*

Yoshida: Huh?

*Ishimoto has a phone in his hand*

Ishimoto: Saved.

Yoshida: Hey, Ishimoto...

Ishimoto: Yes?

Yoshida: Please don't tell me you have a picture of me?

Ishimoto: I do.

Yoshida: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! PLEASE DELETE IT! GIVE ME YOUR PHONE!

Ishimoto: No.

*Yoshida tries to reach Ishimoto's phone*

*Ishimoto dodges*

Yoshida: GIMME.

Ishimoto: Ok.

*Yoshida reaches Ishimoto's phone*

*He starts tapping on the phone*

Yoshida: YES! THE GALLERY!

*He presses the phone repeatedly*

Yoshida: DELETE! DELETE! DELETE! DELETE! DELETE! DELETE! AHAHHAHHAHA! IT'S ALL GONE!

*He gives the phone back to Ishimoto*

Yoshida: My dignity has been restored.

Ishimoto: Oh, it hasn't. It's saved in my personal drive.

Yoshida: Wait, what? THEN WHY DID YOU LET ME DELETE YOUR PHOTOS?

Ishimoto: Oh, I thought it was a pain to delete all of them so I had you delete all of them for me.

Yoshida: WHEN DID YOU-

Ishimoto: When you tried to reach my phone.

Yoshida: HOW- NO! YOU THOUGHT OF DELETING MY PHOTOS AS A PAIN YET THE PROCESS OF UPLOADING THEM TO YOUR DRIVE ISN'T?

Ishimoto: Cake.

Yoshida: Cake? Huh?

Arata: He wants cake.

*Yoshida kneels to the ground*

Yoshida: Just kill me already.

Ishimoto: Oh, I also had a video of you along with those photos.

*Yoshida's mouth begins to foam*

Hara: YOSHIDA??!

HOW LONG ARE THESE IDIOTS GONNA TAKE YAPPING?

*The four of the Slice-of-Life Protagonists are at the mall*

*They are in front of an arcade*

Hara: ARCADES! A MAN'S BEST FRIEND!

Ishimoto: Arcades are dogs?

*Arata facepalms*

Yoshida: Let's just go play some Street F*ghter!

So Author-kun decided to change it again and just change it to the actual thing eh? But chose to censor it instead? Quite bold and idiotic changing it in the middle of a story.

Hara: No, let's play some basketball.

Kibe: How about some air hockey?

Hara: Huh?

*All four of the Slice-of-Life Protagonists are looking at Kibe who is now beside Hara*

All four of them: HUH?

Arata: YOU!

Yoshida: WHY ARE YOU HERE AGAIN? ARE YOU A STALKER?

Kibe: Come on dude, can't we just play some games?

*Arata whispers to Yoshida*

Arata: Did he just call you a dude?

Yoshida: This guy just called me a dude.

Kibe: I can hear you.

Hara: SECURITY!

Kibe: NO NO NO! Can't we just play some air hockey?

*Ringing phone*

Arata: Ishimoto, is that your phone?

Ishimoto: My phone is in Silent Mode.

Kibe: It's mine.

*He opens his phone*

Nakatani: ONII-CHAN! I NEED YOU TO COME HOME FAST!

Kibe: Oh, you managed to use your phone this time, well goodbye.

*He ends the call and puts the phone back in his pocket*

*Phone rings again*

JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!

*He picks up the phone*

Kibe: What is it? I'm quite busy right now.

Nakatani: Onii-chan, I know how lonely you are an-

*Kibe hangs up from his phone, presses something and then proceeds to put it in his pocket*

Arata: Who was th-

Kibe: Let's play some air hockey.

Arata: Don't you have to-

Kibe: Let's play some air hockey.

Arata: Uhh, was that yo-

Kibe: Let's play some air hockey. 'Kay?

Arata: Fine.

*Hara and Kibe are playing air hockey*

Kibe: HIYA!

Air Hockey Machine: Score. Player 1 Wins!

Kibe: YEAHHH!

Hara: He beat me... again.

Arata: Don't feel down. He beat me 10 times.

Yoshida: Noobs. Watch me win against this amateur.

*Kibe and Yoshida set their positions on the air hockey machine*

Yoshida: As you can see...

*He poses arrogantly*

Yoshida: ...I'm the best out of these three amateurs.

Arata: I hate to admit it but he's right.

*After 15 matches*

Kibe: I'm tired. Are you really the best?

Yoshida: I CAN WIN! HIYA!

*The hockey puck was knocked to Kibe's side while Yoshida completely opens up his goal*

Checkmate. Just watch the angle, and then see the hit which causes the greatest opening or attack his blindside. I'll go with the...

Kibe: BLIND SIDE!

Ah, the classic "say your move" cliche of protagonists. I've been practicing a whole lot. This will definitely boost my position.

*The hockey shoots very fast into the goal*

Air Hockey Machine: Score. Player 1 Wins!

Hara: Wow... Yoshida, you suck.

Yoshida: NOOOOOOOO! YOU MUST BE CHEATING!

Arata: He didn't, Yoshida.

Ishimoto: I felt quite sorry for you that you didn't even win once.

Yoshida: FINE! THEN YOU HAVE A TURN!

*Kibe and Ishimoto set their positions on the air hockey machine*

Hara: Sorry to break it to you, Ishimoto, but you don't stand a chance against him.

Ishimoto: Y'know, I've never once considered trying my best cause I think it's just a waste of time.

This cliche. I've seen it thousands of times already. I can tell...

Ishimoto: But seeing you, maybe I can start giving it my all too.

He's the hardest one of them all...

*Ishimoto hits the puck and Kibe hits back*

*This exchange lasts for an hour*

Yoshida: Um, I know this is fun and all, but aren't you guys taking this a little too seriously?

Kibe: I'LL NEVER LOSE!

*Hits puck*

Ishimoto: Neither will I.

*Hits puck*

*Kibe hits the puck and it goes into the goal*

Kibe: YESSSS! PROTAGONIST POINTS FOR ME!

Ishimoto: Good game.

Kibe: Good game.

Hara: We took too long...

*They shake hands*

*They head out of the mall*

5:30 PM

It's almost nighttime.

Kibe: I guess it's time to go huh?

Arata: Yeah... we wasted too much time on air hockey.

Hara: Well see ya round, Kibe.

Yoshida: Mark my words, we have unfinished business, Kibe.

Ishimoto: See ya.

*The four Slice-of-Life Boys leave and go home*

Kibe: That was some nice progress.

They now consider me as someone to look up to or to rival.

Note: Progress to Main Character: 60%

Note: PROMOTION FROM MOB CHARACTER TO SIDE CHARACTER OF SLICE-OF-LIFE PROTAGONIST

Kibe: But it seems like my position as Main Character hasn't been sealed yet.

Girl behind Kibe: Wow, Nakatani-chan was right, you are lonely.

Kibe: EH?

*Kibe looks behind in surprise*

Kibe: WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING? And how do you know Nakatani?

Nakatani: She's my friend, onii-chan. We were friends ever since kindergarten. How come you don't know Mie-chan?

Girl behind Kibe: Just call me, Mieko-chan.

Nakatani: I brought her to our house many times already, don't you remember?

*Kibe tries to recall*

Kibe: I don't remember.

Nakatani: Now that I remember, you were always playing your games every time I invited her onii-chan.

Kibe: I guess that explains i- WAIT THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT! HOW DID YOU FIND ME? DON'T TELL ME YOU WENT ALL AROUND THE MALL JUST TO FIND ME?

Nakatani: Oh no, we would never do that in a million years.

For some reason, that kinda stabbed me in the heart.

Nakatani: We had Mie-chan here hack your phone and determine your location with the satellite or something like that?

*Mieko nods*

Mieko: Yeah, that's correct Nakatani-chawwn. I'm a hacker!

Kibe: That doesn't exactly sound reassuring, in fact, it makes me worry even more.

Mieko: You weren't very nice to your little sister, she only wanted you to meet up with someone.

SOMEONE?

Kibe: A GIR-

Mieko: Guy.

Kibe: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! F*ck this, I'm not meeting up with this person.

Mieko: Guess I'll have to do it. Nakatani-chan do you agree?

Nakatani: If it's to convince onii-chan, then okay.

Mieko: Sorry that I have to do this onii-chan but...

*She gets closer to Kibe and whispers on his ear*

Mieko: ...I'll have to delete all your e-r-o-t-i-c files~♥

Kibe: I just have to get some new ones then.

Mieko: Ooh, a tough one, are you sure? Even if I have to delete what's in your "Super secret do not touch" file? I decoded the password.

Kibe: Go ahead. I don't mind, I told you. If that's all you have then you're pretty bad at persuading.

Mieko: Fine, then I give up. Guess I wouldn't have to give you extra files instead, and they're pretty new too, with 4k resolution.

Kibe: REALLY? Wait, that's not enough to persua-

Mieko: Maybe, I'll insert a pretty cute picture of me, with a bonus of an erotic one.

Kibe: I'm in.

Note: Moron.

END OF EPISODE 14