*Ana*
"You'll be happy in Nochten, Princess Anastasia." The nursemaid repeats, but she's crying. Big, chubby tears strip down her wrinkled face even when she smiles down at me. "You will be back with your kind."
My kind? I keep hearing that, my kind this and my kind that, over and over. But what does that mean? I don't understand.
A cold, snowy wind blows to make me shiver and snap the hair band. Silver hair flies free, and I can't see. I don't just mean what's in front of me.
I haven't seen anyone else with silver hair. Only I have it. My father once called it special—proof of the love between him and my mother.
But I don't know her. She died when I was a baby. And I don't want it because it makes me have to leave.
I want to go back inside where it's warm- to go back to Papa.
"I don't wanna go," I look up. "Please, I'll be good for Stepmother, "
My nose begins to run with a thin snot. I lick it away for more to drip down. I pull on my nursemaid's arm.
"Please, I swear-" But I grow afraid when she pulls us closer to the carriages.
"Don't make me go," I'm now crying. I scratch at the nurse's hand to see her wince, but she does not stop. My shoes scrape the ground as she goes on. Her grip is too firm, and I can't break free.
"Please!!" I stumble over my feet, but she stops my fall. She yanks me back up to drag me forward.
"Why are you doing this!?" I yell between tears. But she won't look at me and continues to drag me closer. The doorman jumps down to open the door.
Inside, I see it's full of blankets and pillows. It scares me even more than before.
"No!" I pull on her hand and bite her.
"Humph," The nursemaid swallows the pain and wipes her face. She smiles at me as I let go to see I've left a red crescent mark on her thin skin. I broke the skin to make it bleed.
"They'll take care of you and love you." The nursemaid chokes as tears fall down her cheeks.
I look behind her. I see Papa and Stepmother standing inside. Papa stands tall while Stepmother moves her hands over her swollen belly.
I look to see my Papa look down at me, but it's wrong. A cold veil falls over his blue eyes. Papa looks back at me as a stranger.
"Papa-" My voice stopped as I saw him turn away. I stop breathing. For a brief moment, I see Stepmother smile down at me.
"Papa?" I whisper and lose my strength. I stop pulling as large, heavy tears drip down my chin.
"Yes, they will love you so much, Princess Anastasia," The nursemaid repeats as she lifts me into the carriage. She shudders then and throws her arms around me.
"You won't ever feel unloved again." The nursemaid pulls away to look at me with a crumbling smile. Her eyes and cheeks glistened with tears. Yet, even in such a state, she looks at me warmly.
"Be good." She farewells as the door closes. Above me, a whip cracks before the carriage jerks forward. We start moving, and gradually, the castle disappears into the snow.
-x-
When the carriage slows down, I instinctively know to look up. Something is coming up in the distance.
"Nochten, " I whisper, looking out at the empire of vampires and, more importantly, my new home.
The closer we get, the better I see the palace. It's constructed of white stone and pointed gold domes. Outside of the building, though, there is nothing. There are no trees or grass. It's all sand.
The only decoration is a fountain. It gushes and bubbles water before the grand doorway. Behind the fountain, there are people.
A heavy line of people stands in front of the doors. They must have come to welcome me. But I want to do anything but that.
I don't want to meet these people. Or anyone.
I want to go back home.
When the carriage stops, I close my eyes. I want this to be a bad dream. It has to be a bad dream.
If I wish hard enough, maybe it will go away.
But the sound of the door opening makes me open my eyes. A wave of heat and foreign smells slap me in the face. It's noxious. I want to cry again as the coachman climbs down to hold out his hand.
"Your Majesty?" the coachman asks, but something is moving. Behind the coachman, I see three people approaching, each with red hair and eyes.
The woman is the tallest. She holds hands with a portly, bald, and short man. The third is a boy some years older than me. He looks to be a combination of the two but handsome.
I take the coachman's hand and step down, but don't let go. I'm scared, too. He's the only one I know amidst these strangers.
"Don't go," I whimper and pull closer.
"Your Empress?" He looks at me curiously, but I don't get to speak as a sudden boom surrounds us.
"All praise to Empress Anastasia!" Everyone exclaims before they kneel with a hand over their heart.
Why are they doing that? I don't know, and I pull myself closer to the coachman, not wanting to let go even more.
"Greetings, your Empress." The tall woman begins with the others following after. They all stand up again. Immediately, I feel their strange eyes looking at me. Their gazes linger on my hair.
"Please don't leave me." I look up at the coachman in desperation.
"Your Highness," The coachman frowns. I let out a cry when he shook his head.
"No, please!" I squeeze his hand tighter, but the coachman is moving. He pulls away and climbs back in.
Don't leave. I watch on helplessly as the coachman cracks his whip to start the carriage off and away.
"Your Empress," The tall woman, meanwhile, steps forward. I don't want to look but feel my head turn. I come to face this new 'family.'
I see them stare at my hair. There is a quick look of disgust amongst them. The same look seems to run amongst the crowd, but I don't understand.
Why are you looking at me like that? I move to touch my hair, thinking something is wrong. Nothing feels out of the ordinary, though. So what is it?
I don't understand, but their expression makes me shrink on the spot.
"I am Funda, your mother's sister." The tall lady starts. "And this, your Uncle Charles. And our son Mykhol, your cousin." Aunt Funda introduces everyone.
"Until you're first blood, your uncle and I will act as regents for the empire." Aunt Funda takes another step but stops as if she is unsure about something.
"Tomorrow will be the beginning of your lessons. Today, let us take you on a tour to help you navigate your new home."
Aunt Funda turns, her husband and son following, to lead back to the palace. Their footsteps move in sync as if rehearsed.
"We will first take you to your room to wash. After that, you will be dressed in our Nochten gowns-" Aunt Funda goes on before she looks over her shoulder.
"Your Empress?"Aunt Funda begins with a quick flash of annoyance. "Your Empress, you need to follow me-"
"…take me back."
"What was that, your Empress?"
"Take me back!" I shout with tears and throw myself down. I fall onto hard little stones that cut my knees. It rips a louder cry out of me.
"I don't want to be here. I wanna go home." I cry out. "I want Papa."
I don't like it here at all. It's too hot, and the people look mean. Why was I sent here? I don't understand, and it makes me cry even harder.
I cry and cry on the ground. I want someone to pick me up, hug me, and tell me it will be okay.
"I want-" I cry, expecting someone to come over. But no one is moving.
Aunt Funda remains still. She makes a strained face before looking at her husband and son. They shake their heads. All three then look back at me, unsure what to do.
It's the same for the rest of the crowd. Around me, the crowd only glances at each other before returning to watch. I'm too shocked to speak.
Why won't anyone help me? I look over the crowd again in disbelief.
Some do look after me, but they won't move. I make out one man, a human with a deep scar over his eyebrow. He seems most upset as he watches me, but he doesn't move even then.
That only makes me cry harder.
I cry until my eyes dry out and my throat burns. I never thought I could cry for that long- never had to before now. But there is nothing more I can give. I'm weak as I lift my head to the faces around me.
All these strangers stare back at me.
Does no one care? I feel the thought shake me. No, indeed, Aunt would-
I turn to expect her to come rushing over now, but that dies like my voice. She looks at me so distantly that I'm unsure if I didn't turn into a bug or something.
"Your Empress, let us freshen you up before the tour." Aunt Funda repeats with a hollow smile.
My Kind,' she said. I remember my nursemaid's words and roll my eyes over the crowd.
She said I would be happy and that they would love me. But I don't see anything. I don't see a gentle expression or warm smile amongst a sea of red.
I just see them stare at me. No, they stare at my hair. I move to touch it, suddenly conscious that I am the only one with the color again.
"Your Empress?" Aunt Funda, meanwhile, chimes. She hasn't moved from her spot. "It's time to go."
"Yes," I nod slowly and push myself up. My dress is dirty from the sand. And my hair feels sticky from all the tears on my face.
But still, no one comes to help. No one moves closer. The three stand by and wait.
"This way..." Aunt Funda says, and the three turn effortlessly back inside. I struggle to follow. My legs are small, and they walk too quickly.
But I manage. I have to. Because they never looked back to check on me again after that.