Another letter arrived after a month or so and this time Rowena was very edgy about all of these strange letters. She had not even opened the first one. It was still in her school bag. The second one was a fast mail and this proved that the sender wanted it to get to get to the recipient in less than the normal time. She collected her courage and opened it ( the second one). Before she opened them she went to a private spot where no one could see her. This was her hiding corner when she wanted to cry alone. It was an old delapidated building that used to be their storeroom. She found a place of refuge there. That place reminded her how lonely and rejected she was in her life. The realisation of being all by herself came in to haunt her once she stepped her foot in that building. The fact that it could fall on her anytime because it was way beyond the state of repairs, reflected in fading images in her mind. What comforted her was that no one had ever gone inside there to look for her. To her the house belonged to her because no one wanted it and it was just what happened to her at that particular time. She felt broken just like that building. She just squeezed herself in between the stack of old items that were in a disposable state. Life had failed her and she felt like that trash she hid in. Life can be tough sometimes, even to the fragile creatures like her. Her hands were trembling while she manoeuvred with all her guts to figure out what the contents of the letters were all about. The address on the top end of the letter showed that the sender was from Johannesburg. Her eyes rushed to the sender's name. Themba had mentioned her other aunt and uncle from Johannesburg.
The letter ( the second one) contained another disturbing news Apparently it was from her aunt ( Cynthia's sister) Themba mentioned to her. She was telling Themba about the sudden death of her brother. He was shot dead while he and his friends were found in a car that was reported to be stolen. When they were trying to escape the police officers he and his other friends were shot and died on the spot. The car belonged to one of his friends and they going to a party. The white police officers suspected they were on to something and acted on their discretion and blow their thick skulls ( according the them) with bullets. This was another big blow to the Mathebula family. The wounds of losing parents and a sister were still fresh but gradually healing. Now that was beyond capability. No child had ever witnessed such great loss had ever recovered completely. Rowena's body was shaking uncontrollably as she was reading the letter to the last paragraph. The tears were already rolling down her face. The first letter was from the deceased uncle. He was asking Themba the reason he was taking so long to go back to Johannesburg with they niece ( Rowena). This made her cry even more when she thought of the day she and Themba were preparing to leave for Johannesburg. She was over the moon and was fantasising about her new life in a city. She never been in a big city before. She kept wondering how it was to be a city dweller.
Now the burden was more for Rowena as she did not know how to tell the news to the elders. She hid the letters in her school bag not knowing that they were carrying such big news. That too heavy to carry that pain alone. She knew that she would be in trouble the moment her secret was out. She wished she was a bit older and was able to just pack her rags and go to Johannesburg to her aunt who was probably the last in her family line. It was a pity that they never met each other. Her heart ached for her uncle whom death took away before they met. She sobbed inaudible for she was fearing that someone might bust her and that would instantly put her into trouble. She was carrying such a heavy burden with her everyday and it was weighing down on her in such way that it disturbed her in her school work. Her teachers were concerned as she was one of the leading students in her class. All of a sudden her marks dropped in highest rate. The teachers gave her all the support she needed. They even bought her the pair of shoes she was dreaming of everyday of her life. At least that brought a smile in her face. She was a bit distracted from her problems for a little while. She felt like other children for once in her lifetime. They even have her the school dress, a shirt and a Jersey. Some of the teachers at school heard about her situation. She was even given food parcels that contained an instant cereal powder and other few items. Unfortunately she took the parcel to where she was staying. As usual the food was shared among the children of the woman who keeping her.
At least her marks improved as she had been distracted from her problems. She felt like a normal child even though she missed her family. Her mind was on her only aunt who was the only family member she had left with. She never saw her. And there was little hope that she could ever see her. She consoled herself by hoping that Jesus would bring them together one day. She continued with her studies as usual. Slowly the pain eased a bit and she gradually forgave herself for hiding her family secret. It was her family otherwise. No one cared how she felt in the first place. It was her pain to endure. She endured it anyway. She put her hopes in God who she believed He would hear get prayers one day.