After listening to his words, Anna could no longer hold her tears.
Yes, she suffered a lot after their break up but she didn't suffer as much as Aiden did.
At least she was aware of the reason why she had to break up with him. And, that reason was her salvation which granted her some leniency from grief and desolation.
But it was not the same for Aiden.
The woman who accepted his proposal and agreed to marry him, broke up with him and disappeared from his life.
His heart couldn't have been in any more chaos. Especially after the memories they made with each other and the promises they vowed to each other, the breakup was something that was totally uncalled for.
Far worse, she disappeared entirely. It must have driven him mad. She knew she was cruel to him. She only hoped that time would heal the scars she left on his life.
When they broke up, she left abruptly because she wanted him to hate her and move on.
If she would have told him the reason, he wouldn't have agreed to break up. That's why she planned it like this; however, it seems like it didn't work according to how she planned.
She should have listened to others and made him believe that she cheated on him with another man. At least like this, he would have hated her deeply and that hate would have driven him to move on.
But he knows her too well. He wouldn't have believed even if she provided him with solid evidence. He would have seen through her and her plan to leave him would have failed.
As the mistake is on her side, Anna could only pretend to look at the ointment, avoiding his eyes. Fat tears rolled down her cheeks and he could see her lips quivering.
"Let bygones be bygones." Aiden said, feeling guilty after looking at her pitiful appearance. Seeing her like this made him feel more depressed. .
He shouldn't have pushed her hard.
He could see the guilt in her eyes and he could see that she is trying her best to hold her grief in which she seems to be failing terribly.
But seeing her like this gave me a bit of relief as well. Whether it's guilt or love or something else, she still has something that is holding on to him. She didn't move on either.
All of a sudden Aiden remembered the suggestion made by his friend/ psychiatrist whom he consulted yesterday via video conference.
["Like I used to say, what you have with her love-hate relationship. Try to eliminate one of it completely. You can either love her whole heartedly or hate her whole heartedly."
"As she appeared in front of you again, your situation has only become more complex. The best option you have now is to talk it out with her."
"You believe that she broke up with you unwillingly. I suggest you test your belief. If you are right, then you can try to mend your relationship and eliminate the obstacles. If you are wrong, vent out the hate and agitation on her and let her go."
"This is the best and the only opportunity you might get. So, test her cautiously before coming to a conclusion on what to choose." ]
This is what his friend suggested and even Aiden agreed with him.
"Coffee?", Aiden asked, diverting the topic.
He has at least six more months to test her. There is no rush.
As he cares for her, he didn't want to be impulsive and hurt each other in the process.
"I.." Anna stuttered, not able to speak.
He would speak all emotionally and the next second, he would act casually as if nothing happened. It is like he has a split personality.
"Ann, I miss the Milk porridge and salad you used to make for me when I was sick. As I am sick now, could you please make it for me?" Aiden asked, not giving her a time to deny his request.
He is in mode 2 now. Casual and laid back.
"Ye..yeah" Anna agreed and hurriedly stood up.
At least in the kitchen, she will get alone time to think properly.
"The ingredients are placed in the same order as how we used to arrange them in our place" he told Anna.
Anna stopped and then nodded her head blankly before walking away.
"This is not good. He is living in the past to escape the pain" she whispered to herself as she engrossed in making the porridge.
Mode 1 : Pain and despair. This is when he is his present self.
Mode 2 : Casual and laid back. He is his past self.
Meanwhile, Aiden managed to walk to the room which he used to monitor the camera's in his house.
As his line of work is dangerous he installed cameras everywhere in his house.
"She is still silly!" Aiden muttered when he saw Anna being clumsy while cutting the veggies. He used to do that task before.
"She is being absent minded." he noticed when he saw how she failed to notice milk boiling out of the pot.
"She clearly cares about me." he told himself when he saw her sobb as she clutched her heart.
He could hear her faint whimpers as she muttered 'I am sorry'.
Biting her lip harshly, she wiped away her lips. He could tell that she is inflicting pain on herself to stay sane.
After that, she pulled herself out of her pity hole and finished cooking. But the despair in her eyes is obvious.
"If it pained you so much to leave me, why did you do it, Ann?" he asked the woman on the screen. He couldn't muster up the courage to ask her face to face, so he could only do this now.
'Is my hunch right then? If so, what is the reason for her disappearance and break up?' he thought.