9:47 PM, 25th of March 1989.
Location: Hovering over the Parc de Belleville
So… I'm talking with Superman. This is very surreal.
But this is my reality now. I don't think I've made a mistake spilling my guts to him, a necessity since even a casual brush with Martian Manhunter will reveal at least that much. Besides, Superman is as trustworthy a guy as you can find. He won't go nuts with it like Batman would, with his obsessive paranoia and Diana is practically Truth incarnate, she'd smell anything fishy a mile away.
So I'm going to lay all my cards on the table before I can make the rest of the League-to-be suspicious.
"I see I've disturbed you enough for one evening. Care to catch a bite to eat, maybe see the sights? I'm sure you've seen Paris before, but from the air?" I was rewarded by the genuine smile from what amounts to a demi-god in the flesh.
"You know, that is the kind of thing I was hoping for, originally." The Man of Steel responds.
"How do you feel about harmlessly pranking people?"
"In moderation..." He smiled, with a faint hint of interest.
"I think we're going to get along, just fine." I nodded. I started to fly to a particularly favourite overlook of the cathedral of Notre Dame. He followed, leisurely keeping pace as we flew.
"I can keep up if you want to fly faster." He suggested.
"But then I'd be unable to hear you over the wind. I'm afraid my glaring weakness is that I'm just as soft as the average civilian with all that entails, I just have better reflexive defences. My abilities are entirely mental based." I hummed. "I suppose a system of radios could solve that problem if we need to coordinate at speed. In the meantime, we could travel at high speed but communication would be entirely one way. Your powers come with radically enhanced senses, correct?"
Superman smirked. "Really, at this point there is hardly anything you could say that would surprise me."
I grew a Cheshire grin. "Reeeeeeaaaaalllllyyyyy?! Because you have some real twists coming your way!"
He waved his hands in front of him in a warding gesture, frantically. "Please no. Give me time to digest what you've already given me first!"
I cackled. "Okay, I'll quit it with the spoilers. How about this instead… do you have any hobbies?"
"Hmm. I like sports, I can keep track of the results with my hearing constantly from radios and television. I like collecting things, scrap booking and tending to… exotic animals I keep as pets." Kal El replied. "Yourself?"
"Skiing is good, in a few years I'll have video games again and watching the movies I thought I knew in this new dimension. Let's just say WW2 documentaries are far more colourful and less depressing than they were in my first life. People with powers like us either kept their heads down or didn't exist in my original world. Although they were certainly trying to develop technology that did similar things to popular culture." I shrugged. "Lightsabers may be more feasible in this world, with so many super genius inventors here."
"An elegant weapon for a more civilised age." He quoted back at me.
That right there made my day, Superman crossing the franchise gap that exists because of copyrights? Priceless. We continued to nerd out over science fiction movies until Superman pulled to a stop.
"...I hear something. Down there." We descended vertically to overlook the situation. "A scuffle?"
Twenty of so tough looking guys, speaking French in a rough Italian accent. They had obviously been part of an ambush. On his knees in front of them was a thoroughly ugly looking man with a deformed back.
"Huh." I grunted in recognition.
"Someone you know?" Superman asked.
I pointed at the cathedral. "Where are we? You have read Victor Hugo's classic tale, haven't you?" I glanced back down at the man who on closer observation had a metallic back brace and wore light body armour under a Renaissance Fair looking garb. A hunchback. Near Notre Dame. Fighting criminals. How… unimaginative.
"I suppose it's his lucky day. He gets both of us to save him in the same night?" I remarked.
Taking opposite sides of the alley we landed, hemming the thugs in. "Step away from the Quasimodo and place any weapons you are carrying on the ground, please." I say in Italian.
Superman smiled and hovered there. "There is no need for further violence, please surrender or we will be forced to apprehend you."
The largest reached for a revolver and began to point it at our vigilante.
"Whoops. Can't have that." I reply as I yank it away before tossing it to Superman who catches and crushes it.
"Yes, that was entirely uncalled for." The Man of Steel calmly replies.
The criminals glance back and forth between us, not quite realising just how screwed they were.
"My friend over there is bulletproof and can punch through concrete." I lift a dumpster and hover it to one side. "I can throw cars around. Surrender peacefully or you'll be made into examples for the next lot of criminals we catch in the act."
From the looks of it, the criminals were sweating bullets. On one hand they couldn't take us and knew it. On the other, they were desperate to stay out of police hands… probably because of outstanding arrest warrants.
The leader abruptly leapt forward, trying to grab the fake hunchback by the neck and use him as a human shield.
He face-planted into an iconic symbol of an 'S' as Superman applied his speed to the situation. Placing a hand on the leader's shoulder in a firm grip Superman then flew upwards about a kilometre in the space of five seconds, pausing a few moments before returning at the same speed. The leader fell to his hands and knees, vomiting before curling up into a ball.
"Please don't hurt us. Do as they say, or we're fucked." The lead thug begged to his own men and us.
"Language." Superman scolded.
"Sorry sir." The thug added.
Did I say I was terrified of Kryptonians before? Because they are pants-soilingly terrifying in person. As the thug has just demonstrated, I notice.