Sometimes I just want to sit down and just think so that is what is going on. Just what is the meaning of life and death? Why are people happy when someone is born and then why are they sad when someone is dead? Is life that great for everyone?
Those are some questions everyone will give you a different answer. Surely most of the people will just pass on the first two questions because if they try answering it with logic, it would take them a lot of time. People love their life, something which have a different interpretation by everyone but they hate and fear the concept of death which has a proper meaning. Why is it feared? Because death just means...
The end of life.
The end of something we don't even know the actual meaning of. Is it just a simple thing of being born or is it something way more than that. Confused right? Here is my interpretation of what the meaning of life is. All it means is that you exist in this world and people around you know that you are alive. This life can be snatched away from you if you are declared dead by everyone around you. Doesn't matter if you are actually dead or not. If everyone thinks you are dead, then your life is taken away from you or the person with your name.
There are multiple people in this world who aren't actually dead but are just declared dead. This precious thing that we all want to treasure is something controlled by others.
For the second question, I cannot give a proper answer because that includes human emotions a lot and I am not good with understanding them. I do feel them, not going to lie about that but we all feel the breeze which blows and slaps our faces but we don't understand that unless we are taught about it. This is the same for me. People just want me to understand human emotions with "experience" but with all the experience I have, I still cannot understand them. They are a pain in the ass.
As for the third question, I don't know. Should I call my life great or not? For me my life has been ups and down. Now I am sounding like those boomers who say, "Life is about the ups and downs" stuff. For me, I am happy with my life. I am the happiest person according to me no matter what. I don't care what anyone else thinks or if they call me weird.
I was brought back to my sense with a loud hit on my head as I held it. Looking down, no I was not at my home, I live alone. I was in the school. Sunshine High school, yes that is the name of a high school. I am not joking nor is this a prank where I will tell you to wave at the camera I set behind you but please take it out or I might see something I am not supposed to. Just saying. This school is one of the top schools in the country and for some reason, everyone in this school is good looking. Like everyone, even the janitor looks like he is the son of Tom Cruise. All the students, teacher, staff and even the principal's dog looks good. Though it is a golden retriever and she looks so cute.
When I said good looking, that also includes me. No, I am not bragging here just saying it as a point which should be noted. In this school, the students who are at the top have always brought success and pride to the school and even the students who are at the bottom also end up with really big name. Every single of them.
Sounds like a perfect place right? Everyone looks good here and everyone end up with a respectable profession. Wrong. You see because of how humans are created, they need an enemy to fight against. At the beginning, that enemy was the environment, then the animals in that environment and when they are conquered, humans made each other their enemy. This also brings up the social ladder and all that stuff. When you think you are the best, there is always someone better and when you think you are the worst, there is always someone worse. Unless you are a very special case. I am not taking them into account. Those special cases are really scary.
In this school, everything is taken care by the students and bullying is something which is not stopped in this school though somehow this thing is not out yet. This point was written even in our school rule book in big bold letter because according to them,
"The weak will always be oppressed by the strong. Students should understand this right from high school before they enter the society."
I don't like or hate this because, they are not wrong about it. If I ever were to find a good hearted person, I will hold his neck and stick it out in the real world. That would be enough to traumatize the person. I hate good hearted people because they are blinded by lies and ideal and they never practically think about just how flawed these ideals are.
The people who come at the top are those who are top in their physical abilities and also their academics. People who are only good in one of them have no place to even be in the top 100.
Now back to that hit on my head. Yes, I thought that all when all this getting hit in the head thing was happening. I know I am amazing, no need to tell me that. As I said, bullying was not stopped in this school so this is the result of that. I was the target of bullying of the entire class. It has only been four months and there was nothing they have not done. Well, I always skipped physical education periods and also normally slept in the class which earned me the title of "snail". Don't ask me how I got that name. Even I have no idea.
"Hey snail, stop day dreaming," shouted the boy who hit me.
I don't remember everyone's, no, I don't know anyone's name in this school because I never bothered remembering them. I even forgot the name of the person who always calls me behind the school and beat the hell out of me. I just call them by their hair color so the blonde boy was the one who hit me.
"Don't you have anything else to do in your life? You are pathetic," said black haired boy.
"Ah, this guy is just awful. I don't know how he even got into the school," said blue haired girl.
"Hah, let's beat this guy up again," said black haired boy 2.0.
"Sure, how about I kill you this time and I will end this pathetic life of yours once and for all," said red haired boy.
As soon as those words came out of his mouth, I stopped. It was as if the time stopped with me and a switch flipped in my brain as I stood up. All the gazes were on me as I removed my glasses and placed it in my blazer pocket. It was still summers but I wear a blazer, it was not like it was not allowed or anything and I did not want to wear our summer uniform.
I looked at red haired boy as he chuckled.
"What? Is the snail angry?" he said in a mocking tone.
He then aimed a punch at my face. I quickly dodged and twisted my body kicking the chair away and grabbed his neck. With that hand, I pulled him towards myself with enough force to send him flying and smashed his head in the window glass making it scatter everywhere. There was blood on my hand but I did not get scared. Pulling him back, I smashed his head on the desk in front of me because I did not want to dirty my desk. I have to sleep there during the classes.
There was blood all over that desk and everyone witnessing the event were dumb struck. I let go of the boy's neck. I know I did not kill him nor he is going to faint or anything but the damage was immense. He was moving around in pain which increased it by ten folds. I looked at him with intense bloodlust in my eyes.
"Don't throw the words, "I'll kill you" casually. You don't know what it is like to kill," I said.
My words were as cold as the South Pole, or the North Pole. I don't know. Whichever is the colder, that one. I sat back at my seat and started day dreaming. No one uttered another word. About the broken glass, the school will repair it by tomorrow. The janitor is already here to take care of the glass pieces. They don't care about all this because they get lots of funds.
If you ask me then why I let myself get beat up and bullied even though I am strong. The reason is not lame like I hate violence or something like that. It's weird.
Actually, I am a masochist and the name is Miyamoto Daichi.