"The water is nice,"I pointed out as soon as I hopped into the little swimming pool that hugged the patio of the villa. "By nice you mean,cold?"Carlos asked as he took of his bathrobe and threw it on a seat next to the pool.It was taking everything in me not to stare at his beautiful body while he was at it. "Whoah!It really is cold!"He exclaimed as he dipped his feet in the water. "Stop whining.Just get in already,"I said and pulled him in by his arms.He ended up holding me by my waist."Is this okay?"He whispered.I nodded and rubbed my nose afterwards."You rubbed your nose,"he pointed out and I didn't seem to understand the essence of him saying that."You rub your nose when you are nervous,"he added. "I'm on a date with Carlos Gomez.Of course I'm nervous.Too nervous,"I said. "I'm nervous too,"he said and I smiled with relief.It was nice to know I wasn't the only one experiencing the nervousness. A waiter walked up to us with two glasses of champagne."Thank you,"Carlos said as soon as he handed us our drinks.
"How are you holding up?With dad?Therapy?"He asked."I'm doing okay so far,I think.I won't lie though,it's not easy at all.Especially with the drug thingy.It feels like I'll just relapse.Something will just snap and I will relapse,"I said.That was the most honest I had been with anyone since I began therapy.
"I can't believe I'm having a heart to heart with you when a few weeks ago I felt like I was going to stab you as soon as you landed from Carlifonia,"I said. A smile formed on his lips."You'll be okay.Stay positive,"he said but it really did sound like he didn't trust his words too. "You know what,we are always talking about me.Tell me about you.Anything I don't know.You are not exactly an open book,"I said to him. "I don't like talking about me.It's boring,"he said. "Surely,there's more to you than what meets the eye.Hit me,I'm all ears,"I assured him. "I don't know where to start,"he chuckled. "You could start by telling me why you have so many of these,"I said as I trailed a finger all over his tattoos on his chest.I could count at least seven different tattoos on that chest. "I think I want one of these,"I added as I kept admiring the ink on his skin."Did it hurt?"I poised a question.He wasn't responding to me,he was just staring on and on.
"What is it?"I asked. "I could just listen to you talk all day,"he said and flashed me that killer smile. "You could at least tell about these tattoos that you have,"I insisted,pretending not to know that he was flirting with me.He was flirting,right?
"We don't wanna travel down memory lane today.It's not something I talk about,Eva,"he said.I hated how he could just switch from flirty Carl to stern Carlos."The reason behind the tattoos,is it really that bad?"I asked. "Don't push it,Eva."He said and I couldn't help but from.Surely,he knew me to the core and he didn't want me to know him to his core.You'd agree,there was no degree of fairness to that. "Okay,if you ever feel like burdening me someday,I'm all yours,"I assured him. "I know,"he said and lowered his forehead to touch mine.I closed my eyes to enjoy that little moment of serenity.Then I decided to ruin it with a question."Aren't you going to kiss me?"I went. "Trust me,I'm dying to.I'm just afraid that if I start kissing you,I won't be able to stop,"he said. "I don't want you to stop,"I confessed and I could see his eyes light up with excitement.
His lips came crushing down on mine and for a moment I felt the world stop to listen to our hearts beat in sync.It was magical,so magical that I could re-live that moment everyday.I didn't want him to stop devouring me with his tongue.It felt different this time.
I didn't know why.
No,I knew why,I didn't want to admit it,ever.
Our tongues fought for dominance and we only paused when we felt like catching a breath.Next thing I knew,Carlos was trailing kisses down my neck.He stopped right at the top of my collar bone and sucked on my skin.A little moan escaped my mouth.I held on to him,tight because I felt all strength drawn from my feet as he pulled my bra straps from my shoulder,pushing them to the side for more access to my skin.Some kind of heat was building up between my legs and I was scared.
I wanted him.
"Make love to me,"I found myself saying to him.
"What?"He was surprised.Probably by my boldness.
"You once said you wanted to make love to me.I think I'd love that,"I whispered.
"Let's get out of here,"he said and we abandoned our half filled glasses of champagne by the swimming pool and went back inside,him leading the way and holding my hand. He continued kissing me as soon as we made it through the door.The workers that were around immediately abandoned their cleaning duties to give us our privacy.I could feel them eyeing us from the corner of their eyes as they disappeared from sight.At that point,I didn't even care what they thought.They knew me,I was sure.But they didn't know Carlos yet.So I didn't have to worry about us making headlines as Xavi's kids. Carlos Gomez,he kissed me so fiercely,like that desire had always been there.I kissed back fiercely too and I didn't want that to stop.He wasn't my first kiss,but I was sure as hell that I didn't want to kiss any other man.He was everything and he was enough.
When he broke our kiss he swept me from under my feet with his muscular arms."Uh-oh!"I exclaimed with delight.He carried me to the bed in the master bedroom and lowered me gently.He stared into my eyes for a while and I loved the peace that came with that.It felt safe but I still thought it was too good to be true.I pulled him closer to me by wrapping my arms around his muscular trunk. "Did you ever think about me?After Los Angeles?"He asked and I nodded.He was talking about our one night stand. "Did you ever think about me?"I asked in return. "I did,a lot,"he said. "You could've reached out,you knew how to find me,"I said.I then felt his little Mr press against my thighs through his boxers.I smiled inwardly. "I couldn't,you didn't know about me.And I got into a relationship after that,"he explained and I frowned.
"Why did you agree to have sex with me?"I asked and I noticed the discomfort in his eyes. "Tell me,I can handle it,"I assured him.He planted a few kisses on my neck as if to distract me from my questions."I was jealous of you.You had a great father growing up while my step father was an abusive freak.So when you showed up in that club and suggested a one night stand,I didn't say no.To me,it was payback"he explained and I could feel tears welling in my eyes.I wished I hadn't asked. "You took my virginity,"I said and blinked in a bid to stop tears from rolling down my cheeks.I wasn't even mad at him.I think I loved him enough to let it go.I understood how jealousy works.I had been jealous of him too at the beginning.In stead of pushing him away,I held on to him.Tightly even.
"I know,I'm sorry,"he whispered."You asked for the truth,I gave it to you,"he added. "I'm hoping you won't hold it against me.For what it's worth,you were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.Still are,"he said.I smiled. "How about now,why do you want to make love to me?"I asked. "I'm sure you know why,Eva,"he said and brought his right hand to my bare hip. "I don't.Tell me,"I insisted. "Because I can't stop thinking about you.I think about you more than I should and I definitely like you more than I should.Eva,I'm smitten with you.I want you and I need you to want me too,"he said the very words that I was dying to hear for sure. Silence prevailed and my head was spinning.I warned him not to fall in love with me.I didn't know what to say to him. "Please,say something,"he pleaded. "When guys say that to me,I run,"I said to him. "What are you so scared of?"he asked. "That I will lose myself.That it won't work and I won't be able to handle the heartache.That you are too good for me.Look at me,I'm a drug addict.I'm scared of applying to beauty school because I think I won't make it there.You on the other hand are about to make CEO,you are one hell of a guy Carlos.I don't deserve you,"I said to him and he immediately got up from the bed and put his robe on.He was hurt,if not pissed. "You'd rather make up excuses than be with me?You know you want to be with me too Eva.Stop denying it and leading me on because one of us is actually hurting!"He yelled and shut the door behind him and left me to drown in my own thoughts.