"No, I didn't do that." Shini scratches her head.
"Yes, I saw you do it." Shini feigns thinking. Her mind is filled with cartoon scribbles, "He's," Murtisia points into the abyss, "over there."
"I can't see hi-" she stops herself, "whoever you're talking about," Murtisia does the skeleton equivalent of rolling her eyes, "Besides, I thought you said it was just you and Murray down here."
"I forgot, okay?" she throws her hands up, and they slap back down, "I just forgot. Do you want to go see him?"
"No," she cuts in quickly, "no I don't really want to." She sips her cocoa. "When did I get this? Have I had it the whole time?" She sips again.
"I don't really remember, honestly, it just feels natural," Murtisia ponders something for a moment, "I guess maybe you just manifested it on your own."
"Is that special?"
"Not really," she shakes her head, and Shini clicks her tongue in disappointment, "I'm sorry, dear."
"I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up," she shakes her head, "anyway," Murtisia nods, "I'm not sure if I can."
"Can what?"
"Help you, I mean," she scratches her head, "I don't think that's something I can do again."
"Hmm," Murtisia rubs her chin as she ponders for a moment. Shini was still confused as to why Murtisia was so patient, "I have nothing but time down here, darling," Shini remembers that Murtisia can read minds, "you'll get used to it eventually. Do you mind if I ask why it would be too much?"
"I mean, aren't the gods gonna be strong? The one I killed was, and he seemed like a weaker one."
"Why do you say that?"
"He was mostly immobile."
"That's a side effect of his godly domain, food," Shini didn't understand what that was, "Down here, he was in charge of all food-related deaths. Starvation, over-eating, food poisoning, etc." she rolls her hands around as she talks, "When gods incarnate on the mortal plane, they maintain some relation to what they ruled over down here."
"But why'd he get so fat? Couldn't he have just, you know, not gained weight from any of the food he ate?"
"Gods don't have stuff like normal human anatomy. So, we don't need to eat, but that means we can't eat; at least, without drastic consequences."
"So all the food just," Shini leans in, fascinated, "sticks around?"
"Yeah, pretty much. The food is digested, but the nutrients are unnecessary. The body doesn't need to turn them into energy, so it doesn't, but it also doesn't have anywhere to leave from," Shini laughs on the inside. No butthole, she thinks to herself, "Precisely, no butthole," Shini smiles and nods in agreement, "All that stuff just fills up the body, basically. Like a big water balloon that can't pop."
"You know about water balloons?"
"Of course I do," Shini nods slowly, "What?"
"Just, why would you need to?"
"Why shouldn't I?"
"Couldn't you know, like, more useful stuff?"
"I have an infinite amount of memory. Like- like a water balloon that can't pop."
Shini scoffs, "Doesn't seem like you have an infinite amount of analogies."
"Look," Murtisia rolls her eyes, "We've got similar functions to you, but the stuff that does it is different."
"But no eating."
"Among other things."
"What do you call your stomach? Or your analogue for the stomach."
"We don't."
"You don't what?"
"We don't call it anything."
"Really?" Shini is fascinated.
"You're the ones who made up names for it all. At the end of the day, it all just boils down into 'stuff -> energy' just in many different ways."
"Well yeah-"
"You guys also evolved a lot of other stuff too, and I don't really know how that works. I guess what I'm trying to say is that it makes sense. Even though our stuff does a lot more, it's a lot simpler, and it doesn't have to do a lot of the things yours does to let you live."
"Ow."
"I didn't mean to be rude."
"No, I meant like physically- ow."
Murtisia tilts her head back in understanding, "Sorry. It's kind of a whole lot of nothing to throw at someone," Shini laughs a little. "Back on track," Murtisia clears her throat, "the gods are going to be strong on the mortal plane, but not unkillable like they are here."
"But didn't they die here? How are they unkillable if they died?" An intense fear filled Shini. What could kill a god in their own domain.
"Natural causes."
"What's that?" Probably some kind of squid.
"No, time. Not some monster, not some being," Shini is still skeptical, "Unkillable doesn't mean undieable," Shini squints, "we can't kill each other, but we have a lifespan, just the same as you." Shini nods along, "You'll find gods near areas or doing things related to their domain. The god of food made his life about eating," Shini nods quickly, "you'll be able to figure it out."
"Are there gods for smaller things? Like are there gods for specific foods, or does the main guy just take care of it all?"
"The more deaths something causes, the more likely it is to have its own god. There's a threshold: usually around 500 deaths total will cause something to have its own god. There are some exceptions, like when there are only a few deaths from something, but they cause mass hysteria."
"Dingoes?" Shini guesses. Murtisia nods. "So the lesser gods are weaker?"
"Correct."
"And will I get stronger after killing each one." Murtisia hesitates, then closes her mouth, "What?"
"That might be the trickiest part for you."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, when you," she pauses, "defeated the god of food, you," she gestures to shini, bobbing her head side to side. Shini just looks at her hands, confused, "Ate him," Shini nods and her lips curl inward, "and so you gained his power," that was news to Shini, "What's up with your face?"
"Gained his power?"
"Yes?"
"Huh."
"It's actually quite interesting, with the god of food specifically. With each bite of him, you were able to consume more and more, just because of what his powers do."
"Is this the failsafe you guys planned when creating this stuff."
"Failsafe?" Murtisia laughs, "Darling, we didn't plan any of this. Not the best planners, as it turns out."
"So you want me to go around and eat a bunch of gods?"
"You could drink them," Shini gives Murtisia a dirty look, "like a milkshake."
"That's funny." Shini says in a tone indicating that it was not funny.
"You won't have to eat their bodies, just their souls."
Shini states blankly for a second, "Sounds easy enough. Where should I start?"
"Really? Not confused about the souls thing?"
Shini sighs, "I kinda realized just now that I haven't really had a purpose up until now. I'd basically only been alive to pay off my debt, and that was mostly just self-imposed so I would stay alive," Murtisia nods slowly, confused as to how she couldn't read that on Shini before, and if she really was just gonna brush off the souls thing like she understood, "and now I've met some pretty nice people, and realized that Robahg would be pretty upset if I died. So I'm gonna live. And it'd be nice to have some kind of goal in the meantime."
"There's a lot of gods. Still not interested about the souls thing?"
"That's fine. I'm not really super busy."
The leap in logic of 'I want to live' to 'I'll fight several gods,' was admirable, in a way, to Murtisia. And she was getting the impression that Shini was just ignoring the souls thing for now, "Well, I suppose if you're okay with it," Murtisia looks to Shini for a response. She nods, "then it'd be advisable to start with some lesser gods, work your way up."
"Like a pyramid scheme?"
"Do you know what that is?"
"Well, it's a pyramid, for sure," she smiles hesitantly.
"It's not really like that, no. At least the scheme part," Shini nods, "You'll be able to absorb some of the gods' power after you take one down, then you can move on to the next one."
"And then all the money I make from selling shampoo goes to you at the top."
"I suppose, yes."
"What am I getting out of this?"
Murtisia bats her eyes. It's slightly creepy, because she has no eyes, "A purpose?"
"C'mon."
"A wish. Anything you want."
"And you're gonna use that to scam me. Teach me a lesson."
"I'm insulted," Murtisia frowns and furrows her brow.
"I'm gonna say, 'I wanna be the richest person in the world,'" Murtisia rolls her eyes, "then you'll say that the journey made me rich in character."
"No, that's-"
"Or give me a fake check that says infinity money."
"Shini."
"Or-"
"Shini."
"What?!" Shini was incensed to be interrupted.
"You interrupted me," Shini takes this moment to reflect. "I have no interest in swindling you, and I gain nothing from it."
"Then what do you gain from giving me a wish?"
"Presumably, my employees back." Shini peers into Murtisia for a moment, trying to read her intentions. "I'm an open book. Ask me anything."
"How can I know your trustworthy?"
"You can't," she answers immediately, and Shini gives a stink face, "I'm not going to do anything to you, I'm not going to try to convince you to do anything, I'm just asking for your help."
"Seems manipulative."
"Sure, maybe," Shini squints, "but this is literally my only choice. Out of every single possible choice in the entirety of every universe."
"That's a lot of pressure."
"Yes." They sit in silence for a second, "I thought you were on board a second ago."
"I mean, I am," she scratches the back of her neck, "I'm just nervous is all. And skeptical."
Murtisia smiles, "I know dear, and I wouldn't expect anything else," Shini looks down and away, "If you do decide to do this, then I can help you. Maybe give you some advice or some of the power of this realm," she snaps back up, "that's a no?"
"So you can do what, control me?"
"So I can get my people back."
Shini snarls, "I don't need your power for that." Murtisia looks intently and sorrowfully into Shini's eyes, and Shini struggles to keep eye contact.
"I'm only offering it if you want it. I know you don't need it."
"So then why offer it at all?"
Myrtis's folds her hands in her lap, "It's okay to make your life easier sometimes."
Shini shakes her head, "But isn't your whole thing that you aren't the same as us? What would you know about what's okay for me?"
Murtisia thinks for a moment, then nods in defeat, "You're right. I guess I wouldn't know," Shini stares vacantly for a second, then nods and looks away again, "Dear, it's been nice having you here, but I think it's time to go."
"Yeah," she shifted in her invisible chair, "I think it is."
"Well, if you do get a chance to think about it, you can talk to me whenever."
"Even if I'm not asleep?"
Murtisia gauges Shini for a moment, maybe trying to see what she is feeling, "If you would like."
"Yeah- I mean, yeah I think I would."
"Sure thing, then," she smiles a little and leans back, "just talk to me whenever you'd like. I'm both extremely busy and not busy at all."
"That's-"
"Strange?"
"Yeah, I don't really get it."
She laughs, "I know, I know. Omnipotence is a very difficult thing to dance around."
Shini nods, "Yeah, I guess," she taps her hands on her thighs again, "Welp," she wakes up, "how-? Oh, alright."
"What's that?" Shini turns her attention to Calamity, who was in different, more relaxed clothes and was reading a newspaper. Rogue the robot was slowly walking around nearby. "Did you say something?"
"Weird." Rogue said as he shambled around.
"Just a dream. What time is it?"
"You were out a couple days," Cal sighs as she flaps the newspaper. She glances over to Shini, who doesn't really respond. She slaps the newspaper down into her lap, "You're not even surprised?!"
Shini scratches her head, "That's not weird for me."
Now Calamity is shocked instead, "You're joking." Shini shakes her head, "What a specimen!" Shini feels strangely complimented. Cal picks the newspaper back up.
"2. Hours." Rogue states as he shambles back the other way.
"Yes. Just a short nap," Cal goes back to reading. "People came here looking for you."
"Who was it?" Shini asks too quickly.
"A large man and a blue person. Maybe an undine or a-" Shini sighs with relief, "anyway, not important. I got bad vibes, so I threw acid at them and they ran away."
"Thank you," Shini sits up, "that was a good call."
"You owe me," Cal flips the page, "Remember what I asked you to do?"
"Yeah, take the," she looks at rogue, who's doing the robot dance, "take the robot out."
"Yeehaw." Rogue states.
"Not that I don't enjoy your company," she coughs, "but I would really appreciate if you took him out for some field testing."
"Sure, yeah," Shini stands up and stretches, "and thanks again, for letting me stay here and covering for me and-"
"Call it even." Shini nods, "But that doesn't mean you can't stop be here whenever you want. You know, after the robot stuff."
Shini had no real plans to stop back here. It wasn't that she didn't like Calamity, just that she didn't really have any plans to go anywhere or do anything with anyone.
'Are you forgetting about the god stuff already?' Murtisia asks, probably within Shini's mind, 'And that's so cold. She's cute, too.'
"Right," Shini hoists Rogue over her shoulder.
"Ow. Ow." He complains.
"I wouldn't mind that," Shini smiles as she walks out the door. She turns back, "When am I supposed to come back? And what am I supposed to be looking for?"
"Uhhh," Cal blows a raspberry as she looks up. She holds for a second, then goes back to her newspaper, "come back in a couple weeks. As for what to look for..." she trails off, "whatever you think is cool. Just whatever his whole deal is."
Shini nods hesitantly, "Got it."
"Basically," she puts the newspaper down, and puts her finger up, "think of it like he's an actual person, and you're trying to assess his personality."
That was a bit better. 'Just tell her you don't understand.' Shini couldn't do that, she was already halfway out the door, 'Oh-!'
"Alright, will do."
Calamity smiles as she picks the newspaper back up, "Thank you, Shini. It was nice to meet you." Shini nods back in response, and walks out the door.
'So then what's your plan? With this whole robot thing?'
'I don't know,' Shini thinks to herself, 'I'll just have to figure it out. And what are you doing in my head anyway?'
'Just here to give advice when I can offer. Figured It'd be easiest to just talk directly to you. Would you like me to leave?'
'No, it's fine. You just scared me a little, I didn't know what was going on.'
'You held it in pretty well.'
"Where. To." Rogue interrupts the mind conversation.
"Uhh, sorry, we'll head to Petunia." Shini didn't really know what to do or where to go, but she was in Petunia before, and it was pretty close by. She figured maybe there'd be some kind of adventure that she could let Rogue handle as a test.
'Smart,' Murtisia remarks, 'maybe sic him on that blue girl or big guy.'
'I'd rather not,' Shini thinks as she trudges on, 'I know the guy, and the girl seems to...'
'Be obsessed with you?'
'like me,' they say at the same time, 'Either way, they're not gonna do any physical harm. How'd you know about them, anyway?'
'Shini, I'm a god. I know everything.'
'A bit invasive.'
'I don't have any feelings about any of it. At least until you die,' Shini frowns, 'hey quit focusing on me,' Shini bumps into someone on the street.
"Sorry," she mutters. She senses that whoever she bumped into was following her now. And with maybe more people now
'What are you gonna do?' Murtisia asks.
'Keep walking until they say something.' And she does just that. Eventually, she reaches the city limits as the sun begins to set in the horizon. It must've been late when she went to bed.
"So what's up then?" A man's voice comes from behind her. Shini sets Rogue down, and turns to face the voice. A group of around 10 men stand in front of her, not looking super friendly. Shini was familiar with all of them, but only just barely. "And what's this little guy," the man speaking steps towards Rogue.
"What do you want?" Shini asks. The man fiddles with rogue a little, "Rogue you can p-" Rogue decks the man, knocking him straight to the floor. The other men start to charge forward, and Shini puts a hand up, "Easy, easy," she kneels down near the first man, and checks for signs of life.
Some of the men start talking amongst each other, "What's she doing? Why don't we just kill this-"
"Relax, Tommy was an idiot. If she kills him then we got a reason to-"
"Probably casting a spell or-"
Shini picks the man up, and tosses him towards the group. The all back up, avoiding him, "Not gonna catch him?" The men scramble to say something, "He's fine, maybe just a little concussed, but he's breathing and alive and stuff. Keep and eye on him, probably take him to a real doctor." She picks Rogue back up.
"Ow. Quit. It." She turns to leave.
A couple steps later, one of the men speaks up, "What you're just gonna leave like that?" She doesn't say a word and keeps moving towards Petunia. The men look around at each other, then at their unconscious friend.
"Ahh," one of them speaks up, "What are we doing, man? Like what are our values?"
"Shut the fuck up, Tcharle, you're always getting all reflective and shit."
And Shini walks off.