I sat on my bed wondering how it will feel to reign one's freedom after spending twenty-five years in prison. When a person lives in darkness for a very long time, he or she begins to fear light.
It was the eve of my release. My head was aching from all the dancing, singing, eating and drinking that had gone on in the prison yard that day as my colleagues threw a party for me to celebrate my release from prison. Every one was happy for me. Of course, some of my colleagues cried because they were not going to see me around them again. I cried too anytime I hugged them. It was an emotional moment time for all of us. Some prisoner seniors came to shake hands with me and congratulate me for being able to serve my sentence. A couple of them hugged me.
The countdown of my release had made me so expectant; it had made me wish for freedom so much. Of course, the real count-down for prisoners, unless they have been sentenced to death or life imprisonment, starts from the very first day they enter prison. No matter of one's sentence, the day of one's release is often one that is looked forward to.
Twenty-five years in prison had had a toll on me. Of course, what was I expecting?
That I will come out looking like miss universe?
I was just twenty-three years old when I was sentenced to thirty years in prison for manslaughter. And now at the age of fifty, I was about to gain my freedom.
Of course, I had looked forward to being released with great enthusiasm. I had prepared myself for it by giving out things I knew I will no longer need once I was out of the prison. I was apprehensive.
How was I to behave once I walk out of the prison? I knew my family was waiting anxiously for me. For all the twenty-seven years that I had spent in prison, they had shown me nothing but love. They never missed any weekend when it came to visiting me. My parents often came with my siblings, Gloria, who comes immediately after me, Stephanie, who comes after Gloria and then my kid brother, Joseph.
It was their love that kept me sane in prison. They would bring me all kind of foods, drinks, sweets and flowers whenever they visited. Even when my father travelled in pursuit of business, my mother will come with my siblings. The only times my mother couldn't come were the days she was very sick. Of course my mother couldn't have gone twenty-seven years falling sick. Not in a sub-Saharan country like Ghana where whether one likes it or not, he or she has the malaria parasite in his or her body. And anytime she couldn't come because she was sick, she will send me a letter that will make me cry while reading it. From behind prison bars, I watched my siblings grow, beautifully. Gloria was twenty-one when I was jailed. Stephanie was eighteen while Joseph was fourteen. I watched them grow in beautiful women and a handsome man. I missed so much of their lives. I was in prison when Gloria came to announce to me that she had broken up with her boyfriend, Lewis. A couple of years later, she came visiting with a young man, Bob, whom she introduced as her new boyfriend.
I was still in prison when Gloria graduated from Medical School and then completed her Housemanship. She became a pediastrician at the Korle Bu Teaching Hospital. Two years later, during one of the visit of the family, she told me that she and Bob are getting married.
I was happy for her; she had grown into a very beautiful woman and definitely was the cynosure of many eyes. I was happy that it was Bob who was going to marry her. He was also a medical Doctor, and he struck me as a very responsible young man the first time I saw him when he came visiting with Gloria. I congratulated him after being told the good news and advised him to take good care of my sister.
Of course, the progress of Gloria brought mixed feelings to me. On the one, it made me really happy to see her doing well in life while on the other hand, it reminded me of the opportunities I was missing and was going to miss in my lifetime as a result of my imprisonment.
Right from our childhood, our father had decided for us what we should become. I was to become a lawyer while Gloria was told she must be a medical doctor.
Stephanie was to become a banker with Joseph studying business Administration to Accra, I had to repeat certain classes in my primary school days. But that didn't really bother me. One of the things that hurt me most about my imprisonment was that I was in my final year in law school when the tragedy happened and ended with me being jailed. So, all the good things that were happening in the life of Gloria were a reminder to me about all that I was missing or will never happen in my life.