[GRANT]
"What if I'm also bad? We're both warriors of our factions. We're both strong, and have accumulated enemies, we have ghosts haunting us. Surely we can live with that, we can fight our battles. I'll show up for you just like I know you will show up for me.
"Why can't we just give it a try, Gideon? What is it that you are afraid of? What is it that is making you take a step back from all of this? I can hear your heartbeats. You want this. I can smell your desire for me, just like I am certain you can smell mine.
"We are both in this together, why do you want to push me away, because—" Grant ranted, but Gideon just stared at him, in disbelief, well until the last statement because that got even Gideon curious.
"How do you know I can smell your desire for me?" Gideon asked, cutting the werewolf short. Clearly, he hadn't been expecting that and it was worth noting.
"I am your mate, Gideon. Of course, I can tell if I affect you, just the same way I already know that you're not a witch. I saw what Criselda did back there when you attacked King Edison. I don't know what he did, but for even Criselda, the advocate of peace to join, it must have been terrible.
"I can tell you're running from something, and you don't want me in the middle, at least that much has been clear from the first day. But what if I can help, please let me in, Gideon," Grant pleaded earnestly.
Gideon looked at his mate, his heart breaking for the tenth time in the little time they had been together. He wanted to make things better for him, he wanted to hug him and tell him things would be okay.
But Gideon knew this wolf knew.
"It's tempting really. I must admit, little wolf, I knew you were smart, but this smart and observant? I must have done something good in my past lives to have you as my mate, little wolf—" Gideon said but once again the wolf warrior interrupted his line of speech.
Gideon had already realized that every word that came out of his mate's mouth was like a stab to his heart. It was all about him coming to terms with a reality he was determined to run away from. Maybe this was how it was to end for them, but why did it hurt each time?
Why did his mate make him feel like there were a thousand stab wounds in his heart?
Why did all of this make him actually want to rethink everything he was currently doing? Someday, he would have to finally sit down and deal with his demons, but today, was just not it.
Today was about goodbyes, but the more he stood next to this wolf, the more he realized how much of a coward he was becoming.
"Won't you even call me by my name? I wish to hear it from your lips, the very lips that just mated mine. The lips that I can't stop thinking about. It's quite sad really, how I know that this was a decision you had made earlier before even stepping into Acrod.
"And yet some part of me still hoped that there was a future for us. A part of me wished we could be together even for more than a day. A part of me wanted things to be normal, for once, but maybe I hoped too much, my love.
"Maybe I put too much pressure on the deities, and this right here is my punishment. Maybe there is just no other way, and as much as it hurts, I know I have to accept that. I was hoping you'd change our mind even after our bond, but now I know, it can't be done.
"At least tell me what you think, how you think. I don't know, but anything, Gideon, Anything. I don't want this to be the end because we haven't even begun," Grant said dejectedly, his voice slowly breaking.
He was showing weakness to a different faction. He was letting his guard down and that was risky, but then the man in front of him was his mate. The man who didn't want him and yet wanted him with the same intensity, was the love of his life.
Gideon looked at the little wolf warrior he had taken a liking to.
He studied his mate, gently breathing him in like this was the actual last time they would be together. He could feel his pain, because of the bond they shared, and for a moment, Gideon wanted to ignore the fates.
For that moment, he wanted to pretend that they were in their own world, just him and his little wolf, living their lives to the fullest, but that was an illusion. However much they both wanted it, there were so many dangers lurking around, and Gideon couldn't afford that.
So in response to his mate breaking right in front of him, Gideon kissed his forehead. That was the least he could do right now, because he knew for a fact that if he let himself drown in the warrior's love for him, there was o way he would go back to Greroth.
And Greroth was where everything could be fixed.
Greroth was his home, had been his home for the past few years. That place had taken him in when he was at his lowest and that was the home he would always know.
"Oh, love. Please tell me you understand why I have to leave—" Gideon said to the warrior, in the hope that it would clear his own guilt, but what was the point when he could feel the whole of his body hurting because of what he was doing?
"I know you're about to reject me, but, before you reject me, I have one last favor to ask of you, and you can't deny me that, no matter what is going on in your head Gideon," Grant said, trying to manage a smile, even when his heart was about to be crushed into pieces.
Gideon looked at his little wolf, a similar sad smile on his face, before asking him, "What is it, little wolf?"
He knew this was risky, because the wolf could literally ask for anything, and it would be cruel for him to deny it. But what if the warrior asked for his hand?
What if the warrior told him to choose Acrod?
What if the warrior wanted to go back with him, despite the innumerable times that Gideon had insisted that they couldn't? There were so many what-ifs in their situation, but right now, Gideon wasn't thinking of the possibilities.
He was thinking of how the man in front of him could be so strong and gentle at the same time. He was thinking of the way they could have had a beautiful family together. However, once again, his line of thoughts was interrupted by his mate's insane wish.
What the fuck had he done?
"Will you at least kiss me before you reject me?" Grant pleaded, his common sense and dignity leaving his body in the presence of the man he was yearning for. Goodbyes sure did hurt, but goddamn, none of that had prepared him for this.
He could as well face his new reality, right?
"What? Oh, love," Gideon sighed sadly, before slamming their lips together, without so much as a warning. He knew if he gave the warrior a chance to think about it then they wouldn't do shit together, and that wouldn't be fair.
Gideon knew the warrior was trying to feel better, but there was never anything good about seeing a rejection coming and being forced to accept it. So he wanted to make things right for the warrior. At least then, he would have a better life, but would he?
"You have to make me a promise, little wolf."