It had been a long time since I didn't feel this familiar sensation. I thought it had gone, but it only buried just right enough to be able to dig over a small matter.
Home.
Or I used to call it ones.
"Ms Knight, your father has been waiting for you in his office." Louis, the head butler, informed me as soon as I stepped out of the car. The two other butlers were preoccupied with my belongings, bringing them upstairs.
Suffocated.
My throat felt tight at the sight of the building ahead. It didn't have many changed since the last time I remembered. The house was located on the hill and surrounded by thick forest, herbs and a rosemary garden. I used to go spend most of my time exploring the places with my Mom and my sister whilst my father was out of town. If you walked down to the west, you'll eventually meet with an open wide sea.
Memories flashed inside before they separated into small pieces. The more I looked at it, the more my chest felt tightened.
Weekend was supposed to be peaceful in LA.
A sudden ticket came with two guards from my father. Thirty missed voice calls showed on the screen after I locked myself in my apartment, refused to get out and packed my things. I didn't know if he realized this, but I always hate coming back home no matter how gorgeous it was.
"Yes, Ms I know that well enough," Louis tone was very gentle like a warm embrace.
I told him that I wasn't being sad. But he kept making that empathy face. His stare strike into my soul and I didn't like being exposed.
"Ms, it's not very like you,"
"I only smoke when I feel stress, "
Louis shook his head slightly, trying to regain his composure from staring at unfamiliar sight. "Ms..." He began. "For short information, smoking is the ultimate causal for several diseases, such as cerebrovascular disease, lung cancer, and..."
"...and I need you to shut your mouth," I finished off his sentence, sucked in so hard on my cigarette almost half of it in one breath, before throwing it outside of the garden.
Louis nodded quickly but shortly after, I heard his voice again.
"H-how long have you been smoking, Ms?"
Just as I was about to answer, fate encountered me with my long-lost sister, Jeanna. There was an open window in the hall, and the night breeze blew her raven hair to the side. Four brown eyes were staring at each other but no words passed my lips. I didn't miss her like I missed Mom.
Jeanna was always portrayed as the perfect daughter, cunning and taunting just like our father. Compared to me, I always being the second option which meant no matter what I did, it would never be enough.
"How was LA?"
Louis took a few steps backwards when He saw her standing on the stairs as if waiting for my arrival.
"Amazing." I told her honestly. "It's way better than here,"
"Oh really?" She scoffed.
"Yeah, living alone is like a real freedom. I work and earn enough money by myself. People don't racist as much as we are, sister. I make lots of friends there,"
Jeanna scowled at my short explanation. Judging by the look on her face, I might have crossed the line a bit. For the past two years, we both knew just how much she jealous of the way I live my life in LA.
When I decided to leave this house three years ago, Jeanna made up her mind and chose to stay by father. Sacrificing her youth to marry a wealthy man was one of her role as the perfect daughter. With that, all the plans and prosperity laid in front of her eyes.
Was all the money worth rather than your freedom?
"Ms, your father needs you immediately." Louis might sense the tense in the hall, so he decided to remind me of this matter.
"You're right. Father needs me,"
"Prepare yourself a marriage, little sister." Jeanna chirping voice heard in the background as I stopped dead in my tracks.
Red dress, the same tradition, same dining room and usual fine wine enough to make me feel deja vu.
When I turned my head to Louis, he didn't dare to look at me in the eyes.
"What do you think he calls you and tell you to come back?" Jeanna's eyes lit up, curious for my answer.
Perhaps he misses me? My inner thoughts seemed more positive than my heart.
Jeanna laughed quietly, satisfaction showed up on her face when I chose to silence. Her words sting a lot than I expected.
It was then I've realized, a simple ticket this morning was sent for one purpose. The anger rose, bubbling inside of me. The thought of being set up by the same person all over again was dreadful. I wasn't my sister, I told myself. I wasn't Jeanna.
With quick steps, I walked to the corridor heading to where his office located. There was a big brown door with a lion's head carved on the alder woods, I remember just how much I scared about it when I was a child. Louis lifted his hand to knock, but I swung it open in a blink of an eye. The door was always heavy, but I still managed to open it wide, made it looked like 'barged inside'.
"You still have no manners, I see."
Gucci suit. Vitto Manhattan Shoes. Angular face with just enough wrinkles matched his short-pointed beard which traces his jawline.
"Father..." I greeted him coldly. "I tend to use my manners on someone who worth my respect."
It had been a while since the last time I saw his jawline clenched because of me.
Business and pleasure were all he could think of. An ambitious type of leader who willingly to gave it all as long as he got what he wanted. After succeeded to make Jeanna marry a wealthy son from the neighbour company, now he chose to set me up instead of work hard to develop his assets.
"I knew why you forced me to come home, father."
Ms, please..." Louis tried to grabbed my arm but I yanked it away.
I never imagined the day when I come back home would be like this.
"Before you gather all of our family, let me make myself clear, father. I, Celeste Elanor Knight, will not marry anyone of your choice!"