I ran my hand tiredly over my face once, before I could overcome myself to lift my gaze. I was greeted, however, only by a gush of dust, which was stirred up by me and still wandered in the air.
It was proof that no one had set foot in this room for a long time. It seemed even longer ago when it was actually used as a bedroom. Only those who knew of its former purpose would have paid attention to the curtain rails or the dresser. After all, they were one of the few things left behind by their former owner.
Before they simply removed the bed, as well as the rest of the furniture, and turned it into a storage room instead. I could also be sure that there was not a single picture of my mother in this entire property.
Every trace that existed of her was simply destroyed without further ado. Even during her lifetime, her beloved garden was completely destroyed and rebuilt. She was expelled from her chambers even much earlier and had to live in the annex.
She had been able to take her clothes, jewelry and also general valuables with her, but only so that in case of emergency there was the possibility to sell it for money.
»Why does Father hate us so much?«
A deep sigh inevitably escaped me.
Why had I asked Mother this question of all things?
»Your father doesn't hate you, Kalea.«
"Then why are you crying every moment?", I asked into the empty space, however, of course, I received no answer.
Only now did I realize that Mother never spoke of herself. She had always affirmed that I would have it better someday. Father didn't hate me and that I would get over the bad in the near future, but... never with a single word did she say the same about herself.
"Where do you get this foolish idea?"
Again, I had asked my question aloud, however, it was a habit I had picked up from my mother. I noticed it only because I had to clear my throat the next moment. My throat was completely dry and it was a more than just unpleasant feeling.
How could the duke possibly believe that my mother had been unfaithful to him?
True, he had always been a rather commanding and possessive man, but despite that, I just didn't understand. There was little for which I would certainly put my hand in the fire. Very little indeed. My mother's faithfulness, however, was one of the few exceptions.
So how could one's own husband distrust one so much?
A deep sigh escaped me in the next moment.
I couldn't really care less. After all, the answer to my question would not improve this situation either. The years in isolation and the associated shame would not disappear. My mother would remain dead.
"Morgiana possibly?"
Although I resolved not to think about it any longer, I could not stop my mind from continuing to spin my thought processes.
In fact, the duke's mistress would have the greatest advantage if my mother lost not only her husband's favor, but also her prestige as well as powers. Precisely because my younger brother was treated by her as his biological mother.
"Foolish. Every single one of them.", I murmured softly before cautiously stepping up to the window. A sick feeling crept over me as I looked out at the familiar landscape. Irrefutable, due to my height, I could catch more than a small glimpse of the backyard, but it didn't change the fact that this view was the only thing I could see of the outside world for a long time.
With a soft sigh, I pushed my hand away from the wall I was leaning against due to my exhaustion. It only gave me a bad feeling to look further out. Often I just felt like an animal that was kept in a cage and considered dangerous.
I was never allowed to spend more than a few minutes with my brothers, and the duke had long ago stopped paying attention to me. Whenever our eyes crossed, there was only an incredible amount of anger and disgust in them.