I tapped my pen while waiting for my fiance talked, for the past of hours we did not speak because busy with our thoughts. We should plan our wedding, right? It's already been awhile too since I talked to her. I miss her badly. "Um…" finally! "W-we should talk about…. how many guests we want to invite?"
It's not bad for a good start. I draw a column and cell, then write to my guest and her guest. "I wanted to… invite my family members. Is that okay? Since my uncle is still alive." Okay, I write it down to her column. My number one guest is… Kwang In. He's my brother.
"Do you have any close friends or… best friends want to invite?" She stared blankly. Oh, right, the Escobar woman. I took a deep breath and hold her hand. "As I get out from this hell, let's we meet her okay? I also… know her step-sister."
She looks at me. "That means you also know her too!?" She widen her eyes. I shook my head. My relationship with her sister it's just a client, no more. Besides, I heard she has already divorced to her wife. Now, how do I explain it to her?
"I'm honestly… doesn't know who Jenny is, but I already know her step-sister. She's one of my… client." Rose hummed. Please don't ask what kind of job she told me to. "Do you want to write her name down?"
She nodding her head. "You will invite your family, right?" She asked. I almost forgot about them. My family, especially my dad, he doesn't want to see me. "I want to meet them." Alright, alright.
"I can manage that, but… if they make you uncomfortable, I can't invite them. I will send the invitation, but it's up to them they will come or not." She holds my hand.
"I'm sorry to bring them up, but it's important to let them know your marriage as well, right?" She's right. It's a wedding. I should let them know even though they disagree, we will keep going. I keep wondering why people out there were easy to get their love of their life, fortune, and power.
In my whole life, I should suffer first. For me, it's not fair if my parents told me to get married to someone I do not love. "Lobak? Are you okay?" I shook my head..
"I just… thinking about bringing you to… my dad's hometown." She looks at me. Right, I haven't told her about my whole family. "My parents weren't from the same island as your parent. My dad's parents, which is my grandparents, they were dead."
Rose hummed as she nodding her head. "You haven't visited their graveyard?" I shook my head. "Why?" I don't want to answer to her question because it's personal. I remember how Eva fucked me badly, made my uncle intervene.
"I don't want… to answer it, yet, but… I'll let you know if I'm ready." She nodding her head. One thing I like about her, she's not force me to talk. I leaned my head on her shoulder.
I keep wondering what if I decide to not opened my heart to her? I'm not expecting this to happen. None of us not expect this thing to happen. Marriage. We lived in the country where people like us will dead. We're a minority, can't join pride parade, and stealing kisses as the curtain fall.
"Babe, I know it's hard to reunite with your family. It's also important for our future, right? I don't want our future kids having a terrible childhood because of their parent's past." She said.
"You right, I can't let my ego destroyed me." I hold her hand. "Now… what we should discuss next?" She picked the paper in front of me.
"Your handwriting is awful! I barely can read this!" She squeezed this paper, then tossed it to the trash can. She opened my agenda, read page by page. I'm not complaining about my handwriting. "You can draw!?" I'm nodding my head.
"It's just… a hobby." It's been a while since I broke up. I never drawing again after that. I need weeks to practice again. She keeps read it.
"Um… what does it mean?" She pointing to row number 3. I'm looking at where is she pointing at.
"It's… just my… boredom writing. Nothing much." I said. She kept flipping pages and found a blank space to write.
"Do you want to invite your clients, investors, and employees to your wedding?" She looks at me. The question is. Do you want to make it simple, or expensive? It's up to you. I know we're going to get married, but I want to make it as simple as I can.
I don't want my private life sniffed by the journalist. "Do you want… to keep it private? Because… I don't want journalist sniffing my personal life." Some of them don't know who my lover is. Keep your life as low as possible.
Rose took a deep breath, then exhale. She nodding her head as we proceed to the next discussion. "In total… we invite only…. 40 people?" I'm nodding my head. I cleared my throat. "Are you sure about that? We even can't hold a party after that."
Party? I don't like a party. I'm scratching my hair and cleared my throat. Oh, babe. "I don't like party." She looks at me. "If you want a…"
"No, I'm sorry, I just…" she took a deep breath. Is that okay for the couple to debate about their marriage? Maybe… we should discuss it slowly. "We should get to know each other well." We haven't spoken for 3 weeks after that incident. It's getting awkward.
"How about… we go somewhere and talked about what we like and what we don't do without our friend interfere?" Dos and don't. I'm not patience to get it done with you.
"Don't forget to… write our vow," she standing up, tidying her belonging. "I should go home, or the old lady will pick me up and we should cancel our marriage." Yeah, we haven't been free yet. We will continue this conversation tomorrow.
TBC