I shook my head as the tears began rolling down my face and would not stop.
"No, no, no, sweetheart...baby...please don't cry," Connor pleaded, touching the tears on my cheeks with gentle hands. "I hurt so much when you cry."
Corwin closed his eyes and kissed a tear rolling down the right side of my face. "Hush, my love. Everything will be alright."
I shook my head. "I refuse to choose. All I see ahead is shared pain for everyone. True love heals and makes whole what is broken and battered. It should not devastate and tear apart brothers and lovers."
"But if you don't choose, we will both be left without you for the rest of our lives. We will both still cry, and so will you." Corwin's logic was unflawed.
"Is there no other way? What would you think if I chose you both? What would the world think?"
"Why can't I choose both?" I sobbed, crying in earnest.
They had no answers for me as they both gathered me into their arms and allowed me to cry out my frustration and sadness.
The reality was, no man would allow his woman to simultaneously be with another man.
Alternately, no one in the world would look kindly upon a woman who openly had two lovers at the same time, most especially if those two lovers were brothers.
It wouldn't matter at what age of consent, their parents would never allow such atrocities to occur, and neither would my parents, whoever they were, for that matter.
Morning found us still entangled in each others' limbs. The twins had fallen asleep as soon as I stopped struggling.
Once they had fallen asleep, I did not have the heart to move for fear of waking them.
They had not had a good night's sleep in so long, and I didn't know if there would be many more opportunities for them to sleep peacefully in the future, so I did not disturb their slumber.
And in the gracious act of allowing them to sleep, I also found my own peace which, in turn, allowed me to sleep through the night as well.
Since we'd slept side-by-side for most of the last couple of weeks, it was not so much awkwardness that found us in the morning.
Rather, I was still struggling to hold on to the ire that I had felt towards them the night before.
But to be honest, it was closer to a mild annoyance rather than pure unmitigated rage that I had felt yesterday.
Miffed.
That was actually closer to the truth. I was miffed at them, and I told them in no uncertain terms.
"Miffed?" Corwin snorted. "What the hell is that?"
"She's just crabby," Connor grinned. "Breakfast cures all," he assured his brother.
We took turns cleaning up in my bathroom and then went off in search of breakfast.
I thought we would go back to the same banquet facility that we'd eaten at every morning, but that was not the case this morning.
The twins took me down towards the garden pavilion and sat me down under a large awning-covered balcony overlooking the beach.
We were soon joined by Simon, Abe, and Sir Henri Montblanc, and then breakfast was served.
I didn't have to order anything because everything all came out at once, on silver domed platters. All I had to do was eat.
Once our hunger was assuaged somewhat, Sir Henri Montblanc spoke up, directing his comment at me.
"So, Nana. I have heard the news."
He cleared his throat. "Now I admit, I was extremely surprised, but after the initial shock, I became very excited."
His eyes crinkled. "I want to welcome you, my only grandchild, to the family, and I want you to know that you are welcome here any time."
He opened his arms wide. "Please consider this place your home because truthfully, it should have been, and would have been your birthright had you not disappeared on us eighteen years ago."
"Thank you," I said, not knowing what else to say.
Simon looked impress. "Wow, what does that make Nana?"
Abe grinned. "I do believe that makes Nana a real Lady, with all the honors that the title bestows."
He turned to me. "Your name should rightfully be the Lady Nana Belladonna Montblanc, heiress of the Montblanc Estates."
"But…I was not born into the Montblanc family…" I said.
"Within the bounds of human laws, it does not matter where you are born, only to whom." Abe insisted.
"You are not, and was never an illegitimate child."
Sir Montblanc nodded. "That's right. Your parents had been legally married for years at the time of your conception. As your grandfather, I can vouch for that."
"You were my son's child too. You were very much wanted. Very much anticipated. Very much loved."
His eyes grew stern. "You were simply kidnapped by one parent and taken away from the other parent who still had full rights of hereditary and customary parentage over you."
He shrugged. "Of course, now that you are almost an adult, you have the right to live where and with whom you please."
He fixed a warm gaze on me. "Do not think unkindly upon your father. He had no control over what happened in the past."
"Speaking of the devil—Étienne." Sir Montblanc called out.
I raised my eyes to look at the man who everyone called my father.
Now that I knew who he was, I could see where I got my hair color, my eye color, and I could see where I got my lips from.
He seemed to recognize the same features on me and his eyes softened.
"Dr. Montblanc," I breathed. I could not yet bring myself to call him father.
"Ah," he gave a nervous laugh and wrung his hands.
"Nana. I'm really glad to have gotten the chance to finally meet you. Please…" he raised his hands, palms out at me.
"Please don't be uncomfortable around me. I know—I know it was a great shock to you, the way you found out about yourself, but I'm not—I was not trying to be hurtful to you. I just…" his eyes misted with tears.
"I was just so grateful that I got the chance to at least see my child, even if it was just once in my lifetime."
"Well, that would make it now three times that you've seen her, so I'm sure you're overjoyed." Sir Montblanc chuckled.
"I'm also certain that now she knows who she truly is, she won't completely abandon two old men forever, eh Nana?"
He turned back to me. "I have told her that this place will always be her home, and she can come and go any time she wishes."
"Of course!" Dr. Montblanc exclaimed. "We shall set up a permanent residential suite here for you so that you can leave your things and it will never be disturbed. I will have it done immediately."
His eyes grew warm. "So, what are your future plans, er—daughter…may I call you that?"
I nodded. What difference did it make.
"I want to go visit the areas where the primates are suppose to be nesting," I said. "There is something important I need to do that involves them."
"Then I will join you," Dr. Montblanc said. "I know this place like the back of my hand. My research takes me into these areas for months at a time."