(Misaki)
The early morning rain beat down monstrously on the slanted rooftops of the second floor of the palace. I stood here before when Chi first arrived on the back of Okami. My hand found my chest as I rubbed out an aching pain in the center. After I left father last night, I walked idly back to my room in hopes that Chi would be waiting beside my door, but he wasn't. he also did not attend the feast father threw. When I asked one of the maids serving wine if they had seen him, she said that he told his maid that he was tired and wished not to be disturbed.
I had Osa dress me early when I first smelled rain after waking. The thunder clapped against the sky and I watched as the droplets fell on the open overlook on the second floor.
"Ohayo Kitsune."
My body motioned to turn at the sound of his voice. It felt like it had been so long since I'd seen him in his white robes. The only difference now was that he was absent a sword. His hair was in a knot at the back of his head and his eyes housed small signs of uneasiness.
"Tao!" I said happily.
"So, I am the tiger then?" He questioned as he stepped forward to stand across from me. His smile as he watched me made my heart palpate.
"I think so."
"Such high praises from the princess!"
He bowed exaggeratedly low.
"A! Still so dramatic…"
He returned to his natural height and looked out amongst the palace grounds as rain coated every inch of land for miles.
"How did you sleep last night?" he asked.
"Soundly…"
I did not meet his eyes, feigning interest in the rain. I was fitful all night. Akame's concoctions did not help as I screamed every time Susanoo appeared in my subconscious or felt the pain from the sharp nails that scraped my skin constantly while I screamed for help. I didn't need him to worry anymore than he already did. I would get past this.
"And you? You missed dinner last night."
He stepped closer, gathering my hand. "The journey left me tired. I am sorry I was not there to escort you back."
"It's alright," I grinned, laying my head on his shoulder.
"What would you like to do today?" he asked.
I worried my lip until shrugging. "It's raining, what can we possibly do?"
He moved to tilt my chin up to see him. "I have heard from the maids that you Kitsune," he tapped my nose. "Are a very talented fan dancer."
My eyes widened in surprise and my eyes darted around the open hallways. I had not done a fan dance in years! Why were the maids still bringing this up?! Blushing, I shook my head.
"It has been a long time since then. I can't believe any of them remember that."
"I hear it is a skill not easily mastered, and not easily forgotten."
He really wanted to see me dance, and I was almost tempted but… "I have no fans."
A maid came scuttling out of nowhere holding out two long fans. "Your highness."
Hesitantly I took them, my narrowed eyes locking onto the culprit. "Chi-san…" I growled. He was biting back a silly smile I rarely saw him wear. Two more maids appeared carrying a Koto. A large musical instrument made of Kiri wood. An even bigger surprise is when Chi took a seat on the cold ground a few paces back and the maids laid the Koto in his lap.
He grew pleased at my astonishment and readied his fingers on the strings.
"You dance, I'll play."
His fingers struck three cords and it let out the softest sounds. I watched him for a moment as he built up a sweet melody. I resigned myself to the dance. With a flick of my wrist, the beautifully painted fans of swans and bamboo leaves opened. One fan was at my hip while the other masked my mouth. I moved on tiptoe as my steps elongated and my arms fanned out around me. Chi's music continued, climbing ever slightly in rhythm meriting a twirl from me. I tossed first the left fan behind my back, and then flipped the right to face away from me. As his tune slowed, I connected the fans at the base turning them into one and twirling it on my finger before tossing it into the air and catching it as the song drawled to a close. He relaxed his arms on his crossed legs starring unblinkingly at me.
"I did not know that you play to Koto. You play beautifully."
He raised his hand, pointing to where I'd just stood. "Kitsune why…why do you not let others see you dance?"
I shrugged, falling into place sitting across from him. "It fell out of habit. I have not danced since I was a little girl."
"And yet you move as if you have never stopped."
"And what of you?"
"What of me?" he retorted.
"You play so effortlessly."
"My mother, she loved the sounds of the Koto. I learned young so that I could play for her."
"You loved her."
"Hai, just as I love you."
I turned pink with his words and his lips on my cheek did not help. "I have something for you. Meet me in the gardens later this evening, alright?"
"Alright," I replied breathlessly.
(Chi)
She flowed like water across the damp concrete of the balcony. I was so glad that I bribed the cook to tell me something Misaki loved to do. I was astounded when she told me that she'd once seen Misaki do a fan dance late into the night in the gardens when she was younger. She was going to scold her for being out so late in the cold but instead found herself anchored to her spot in the hallway.
"She was so lost in the movements…in all my years I have never seen such effortless dancing."
Watching her just now, I almost forgot to play the right notes. She was mesmerizing as she danced to the song I choose to play. With the rain falling all around her, it was an otherworldly experience.
I wanted to remain with her all day, but I had much to do. I would steal her away later when everything was in order.
(Misaki)
I wandered to the kitchens after leaving Chi, finding Kai there, powdering a large mound of dough. She looked up and smiled at me as she continued to work.
"Up early you majesty."
I came to lean on the large wooden table where bowls of
scallions, slivered onion, peeled ginger, chopped thin garlic, and basil leaves sat in bowls on the other end of the table.
"Your sleep was restless. You cried out many times."
A vine of large grapes sat in a bowl on the adjacent countertop. I walked over and plucked a few, popping one into my mouth as she spoke.
"I am sure it will get better."
"You cried out for the Samurai boy many times."
Now the blush crept in.
"Love is nothing to be ashamed of your majesty. Now I don't know what the two of you went through these past days, but I am sure that it is nothing to be ashamed of."
"It was unexpected," I replied. I could tell some sort of the truth or something.
She smiled and laughed low. "It always is. My husband was a servant in my old patrons household before we married. He annoyed me so much I could not tolerate him. A month later I was obsessed with him." She tossed the dough. "Love is funny in that way your majesty. It prides itself on catching people off guards."
I finished my last grape as she began sectioning off the dough.
"what are you going to do?" she pushed.
That was the true question wasn't it. What was I going to do?
The palace was large and though I knew most of it like the back of my hand it took a while to find the wall where the dragons were painted. Their bodies wound like serpents all the way down this length of hallway. I ran my fingers along them and let my mind wander.
You many hurt those around you...
The goddesses voice filled my heart as the memory came bursting through. I looked at my hands. They still appeared as the same girls hands from a month ago who knew nothing of lies and power, deception, and secrets. But was I the same girl? In many ways I was obtuse to many things. I never thought that the palace would obtain a young Samurai and that he would become so much more to me than an unwanted guard.
Amaterasu was right, I could hurt someone like this. I could feel the warmth of the sun coursing through my entire being agin. Just as it had within the caves. From the tips of my fingers to the very center of my chest I felt power. It was like a coiled spring inside of me and I feared that I could not contain it. If I grew angry, would I hurt someone? If I grew sad and shed tears, would it flood the rivers and towns? There were so many questions and to my dismay I knew that only the goddess was able to answer them. I had no understanding of anything when it came to being a god.
Rounding the corner, I caught sight of Osa. She bowed quickly as I approached. She carried a basket of goose feathers in both her hands.
"Your highness! I was just coming to search for you. Breakfast has been set in the dining hall for you. The Emperor awaits your attendance."
I thanked her silently and hurried off.
(Chi)
"How many would you like?!" the merchant shouted over the
busy people shuffling by and calling out to other vendors in the market. "I require fifty of them to be delivered to the palace kitchen by
nightfall."
I flashed a gold coin in his direction and he eagerly nodded, setting to work. I left the coin in his wooden box for payment and traveled further down to the bakers stand. I purchased a large order or strawberry and chocolate Daifuku for Misaki and had it wrapped nicely with wax paper and a red ribbon loosely tied.
When arriving back inside the palace gates a stable hand came jogging out, eagerly calling out for me to wait a breath.
"What is it?"
"My lord, there is a horse raging wild in the stables! The quarter master told me to come to you sir."
I crossed my arms. "Why me exactly?"
The boy seemed afraid of me and was stumbling over his words.
"He-he says he thinks its your horse, the black one."
Okami.
I nodded for the hand to lead me to the stables. I could hear the loud whinnying as we grew closer. Guards were shouting and the horse cried out in distress. I picked up my pace now, full on running to the stables entrance. How had he found his way back here? I pushed past the guards standing idly by, watching Okami rage in his stall. His thick tail swished aggressively behind him, and his nostrils flared as he reared.
I pressed my tongue to the roof of my mouth and let out a high whistle.
He stopped, his ears pricking up and forward in my direction. He snorted and paced in place. Stepping forward I held out my hand. His eyes were unsure of me, almost like he did not recognize me.
"I know…I'm not sure of myself right now either," I whispered. His head bobbed up and down and he came the rest of the way, his nose filling my hand. "Its good to see that you are alright my friend."
The guards dispersed after I calmed Okami a bit and I sent the stable hand to get a bucket of hot water and a brush. It took hours to get the dirt completely out of his mane and the grass from his legs. Finishing, I grabbed a bile of hay and tossed it his way, using some to coat the ground. Stepping out from beneath the stable roof I realized just how dark it had truly gotten.
I sprinted back up and through the castle to the cooks rooms. I rapped hard on the door, out of breath as she opened it, shaking her head disapprovingly.
"Lost track of time, have we? Not to worry, everything is ready. Hopefully, you get there before she does."
I nodded a quick thank you before taking off again up to the private gardens. I sighed, laying my hand on the round pillar trying to catch my breath.
"Chi-san?"
I whirled around at the familiar address, coming face to face with the beautiful Misaki Osanagi. She giggled lowly and nodded to me.
"So sorry for scaring you." She apologized.
I smiled easily at her, standing up straight and swallowing hard. "You did not scare me Hime."
Her eyes darted around the open space and I knew that she was trying to fathom why I called her here this late into the night. I took her hand casually in mine and pulled her gently forward. The night sky was a dark blue, stars glittering the expanse.
"It is so hard to see here in the dead of night without lanterns."
I smiled at her words and helped her up onto a much shorter bridge. I did not forget the maids standing under cover behind the columns in the surrounding hallways, awaiting my signal. I stepped up behind her, encasing her in my arms. Her hands found my arms and she rested them there contentedly. Raising my fingers, I flicked them forward and the light flooded out. Her gasp made me smile inwardly.
"Chi…" she marveled.
The lanterns I ordered from the market earlier that morning were round, soft, and pink in color. The cook assembled them after prepping the meals for tomorrow and sent the maids to their places in my absence. They were still letting them go into the air as Misaki rose her fingers to the sky around her. The compact lanterns floated around us like fireflies. But it wasn't the lanterns surrounding us that stood out. It was Misaki's turning smile that really lit up my night. Her arms wrapped eagerly around my neck, taking me by surprise.
"Do you like them Kitsune?"
She pulled back before hugging me close again. "A! I love them!"
"I am glad. The damn things were hard to find in the market." "This is what you had to do," She said in wonder.
"Yes. The merchant painted the insides of the pink paper with symbols of hope. I know that all of this…is confusing. I feel lost too. I want so badly to go back to the beginning. When you hated me."
We both chuckled at the memory of when I first arrived here. She did not trust me at all. And now I was holding her hands, content on keeping them in mine for however long I could.
"I would not go as far as hate. A minor dislike will do," she replied.
"My apologies your highness. A minor dislike. No matter your dislike, I still ended up completely enthralled in you. You crept up on me like a shadow and took root in all my thoughts. I want nothing more than to remain at your side, guarding you, and keeping you close at my side. But I understand if we cannot stay by each other's side in the future to come. No matter where you are, or who we become, I will always love you, Misaki-san."
Tears spilled down her cheeks and she stepped into me, laying her head on my chest as I wrapped her in my arms.
"I have not decided yet…" she said into my robes. Her words broke with her sadness.
"I know." I kissed her hair. "no matter what you decide, I want you to remember that in the loneliest, hardest times, that there is hope everywhere. I want you to remember us as the boy who played the Koto for a marvelous monarch who danced in the rain with her fans."
I needed her to remember us this way. I only hoped as I kissed her forehead, that she would hold all these memories for us both. I prayed that she would forgive me for not being able to share them with her.