"Miss Darling, let go," Lowen said and smiled-- his usual smile. A smile that hides the grief in his eyes. I was holding his hand so he would not fall in the dark waters of the sea as our ship tipped over.
The ship rocked again as another cannon broke Labyrinth's hull. Then it exploded! I was startled and my grip on Lowen got loose. Lowen began falling to the sea. His smile did not leave his face. His eyes stayed the same--- grieving.
"No!!!!" I screamed and got up. I opened my eyes and gasped. It was quiet. I checked all around me. I was in my quarters... on my bed. I blinked fast. The ship was not destroyed. There was no sound of navy ships nor cannons. I sighed in relief. It was just a bad dream.
I tried to go back to sleep after that but after so many quick turns, I gave up. I stood up and changed. This time to breeches just in case something happens, I would not be limited by a dress and can quickly move to help my crew mates. I chuckled. I can't believe that a noblewoman like me became an honorary pirate.
I went up the main deck and realized it was still dark so I checked the pocket watch Jacob gave me. 5:00. I sighed. One more hour before dawn. I saw Puma on the wheel. He must be the group assigned during night watch. Fifer was on the watchtower with a telescope. He waved at me after he saw me. I walked to the side of the ship by the gunport and saw Lowen sleeping. I'm glad he's okay and the dream was not true.
I looked up at the sky and inhaled the scent of the seawater. I was beginning to look for the North Star when I heard Lowen mutter something so I turned to his direction.
"Carole…" he said. His eyes still closed. He must be dreaming.
I noticed how his relaxed breath quickly changed. "Stop. NO!!!!" he yelled and woke up. I saw how he took a deep sad sigh after he realized it was just a dream.
"Are you alright?" I asked. He jumped a bit because he was startled when I spoke.
He smiled and then looked at me, "I'm alright Miss Darling, it was just a bad dream," he said then got up. I know he tried to lace his voice with his usual cheery tone.
"Ummmm, Lowen…" I began.
Lowen looked at me with that same smile not leaving his face. "Yes, Miss Darling?"
I was about to ask him about the name he muttered in his sleep but I held my tongue. I do not wish to offend him nor pry about his memories that he didn't wish to share so I just said the first thing that came to mind (again), "Could you teach me how to shoot?"
Lowen blinked thrice, maybe wondering why I said that but he replied politely, "Why would you want to know how?" he asked.
I haven't thought about that. I just said what I said without thinking given the circumstances that I was in. Now, I have to think of a reasonable reason why I wanted to learn how to shoot. Hmmm… I was quiet for a while. Then, I smiled after. "So, I would not need to be rescued anymore, especially by Jacob," I said recollecting what happened at Canupeer.
"I do not mind saving you, Darling," said a cool voice that I know very well. I looked at the person who spoke and there he was looking as fresh as the sea. I rolled my eyes. Who would look so vigorous and lively early in the morning?
Jacob chuckled after seeing my reaction. "Good morning to you too, Darling," he said.
"Good morning," I mumbled. Alright, usually I would just ignore him but after what I learned about him at Canupeer, I couldn't help but respect the man. Although, I still find him annoying and irritating even though he is definitely handsome and charming and…. I shook my head abruptly because I do not like the direction of where my thoughts are going.
Jacob called, "Puma, lower the anchor and go get rest." Puma quickly obeyed and after making sure that the anchor was secured, went to his quarter. Once he opened the door, Elgo went out and after saying a quick good morning to us went to Fifer and told him to go to sleep.
Lowen was currently humming a tune while cleaning his musket when Jacob asked, "What does Darling need from you again, Lowen?"
Lowen looked at Jacob and smiled, "She wanted me to teach her how to shoot," he answered.
"Well? What do you think?" Jacob asked again.
Lowen smirked, "It could really be very helpful but at the same time she might not need you to save her anymore," he teased.
Jacob laughed and nodded, "You have a point but the less things for me to do, the better."
I scoffed. "Well excuse me for being a burden," I said. Didn't he just say a while ago that he doesn't mind saving me? Now, he made it sound that rescuing me is such a task.
He dismissed my annoyance, "Now, now, now, don't be overly sensitive. What I am trying to say is, it is a good idea for you to learn how to shoot," he said nonchalantly.
"Yes, because you find it tasking to rescue me," I retorted with sarcasm. I couldn't help it. It's not what he said, it's the way he said it. "And I AM NOT OVERLY SENSITIVE," I added then crossed my arms.
Jacob scratched his head, "You know what Darling, sometimes you are very confusing. You did say you do not want me to rescue you if I recall it correctly," he said.
"Well you recalled it wrong," I answered, my voice getting higher.
Lowen looked at us back and forth.
"So you do want me to rescue you?" he asked.
"Of course not!!!" I answered back, my face getting warm.
Jacob's eyebrows met. "Well what is it? You get mad at the thought of me not rescuing you but you do not want me to rescue you? How confusing can you get?" he looked at Lowen and then added, "Women are so difficult."
I gasped. Now I am really mad! I looked at Lowen who began to scratch his head too. However, he is still smiling. This time, smiling reluctantly because he was caught in the middle of our squabble.
"I am not being difficult! I wasn't even talking to you in the first place!" I responded and quickly addressed Lowen, "Don't you dare say something about women."
Lowen opened his mouth and raised both of his hands.
"Don't drag Lowen into this! It is between you and me!" Jacob raised his voice at me.
"Do not raise your voice at me!" I replied.
"You raised your voice at me first!" he told me then looked at Lowen again. "Teach her how to shoot! This is so aggravating! I'm eating breakfast!" he said and walked away. He went to the direction of the kitchen door, opened it and slammed it close behind him.
I was left inhaling and exhaling deeply. I can't believe what just happened. The morning started wonderfully and Jacob just came in and ruined it! Or maybe it was me who ruined it. "AHHHHH!!!!" I groaned.
"Do you want to eat breakfast first, Miss Darling?" Lowen asked with a reluctant smile.
"Oh be quiet Lowen. I am not hungry," I replied.
"But, it's difficult to practice shooting in an empty stomach," Lowen told me and beamed.
I sighed. Lowen is right. "I'm sorry I snapped at you," I apologized.
Lowen smiled at me. "It's alright, Miss Darling," he said and excused himself to eat breakfast.
I sat down at one of the wooden chests nearby contemplating if I should follow Lowen right away or wait until Jacob is done eating breakfast before I go. My stomach grumbled. I whined. Even my own body is contradicting me. With heavy footsteps, I made my way to the kitchen.
When I opened the door and entered, I heard continuous laughter. I scrunch my forehead then looked at Jacob. He was laughing heartily with his crew as if nothing happened between us. I sat at my usual place which is across from where Jacob sits down. Paco immediately gave me a plate and fork. Neville passed toast, butter, and warm milk in my direction.
The food looked very appetizing and I know I am hungry but I couldn't pick up my food and put them in my mouth. I mean, I just had a fight with Jacob. How was he alright? I am not alright. I am not angry at Jacob anymore and I want him to know that so I can enjoy my breakfast too. After all, our spat a while ago was very petty.
I sighed and looked up. Jacob caught my gaze. He probably knew what I was thinking because he smiled at me. It was sincere. He nodded as if telling me everything's alright. I sighed in relief and smiled back. I think we've made up.
*****
True to his word, after breakfast, Lowen began to train me how to shoot. He gave me a slingshot and told me to practice hitting the target first. He then placed a can about six feet from me and told me to aim. I did. Of course I missed it.
"It's alright Miss Darling, you will get it soon," he said and told me to do it again. I did and I missed again. Lowen smiled.
It took me three hours before I hit the target. Lowen told me to make sure I hit it ten times consecutively before he can give me his next lessons. It took me a while before I did. At first, I was hitting fives consecutively. Then, it increased to eight. Just before lunch I hit my tenth. Lowen clapped his hands and told me we will continue after lunch.
After lunch, Lowen increased my distance to ten feet. The same rule applied. I have to hit the target ten times consecutively. And so, that happened for five months. Lowen kept increasing my distance until I could shoot a target within twenty meters with eighty percent accuracy. We kept practicing. Even the other crew mates helped me practice -- Mondays with Thom and Tibet, Tuesdays with Sandlot and Zaki, Wednesdays with Neville and Gondro, Thursdays with Sandlot and Urdel, Fridays with Puma and Wabi, Saturdays with Zaki and Elgo, and Sundays with Thaddaeus and Laurel. From time to time, the pirates would use their pistols for target practice to get me used to the sound.
It was Friday of the fifth month. Puma, Wabi, and I were practicing shooting targets while messing around. Puma and Wabi were keeping scores and were having a contest. The winner gets to order the loser for an entire month. I wanted to join the contest but they told me that they did not want to order me around because they were almost 100 percent sure that I would lose. If Jacob was the one who told me that, I would be aggravated but with these two, I even laughed at what they said.
We were having so much fun when Jacob decided to watch us practice. Puma and Wabi greeted him and showed off their skills. Jacob applauded.
"How far can she shoot?" Jacob asked Lowen pertaining to me.
Lowen beamed, obviously proud of me, and answered, "Twenty meters, about eighty percent on target."
Jacob smiled and looked at me. "Not bad. I think you're ready for a pistol," he said then took one of his pistols from his holster.
My eyes widened. Is he serious? Jacob walked towards me so Puma and Wabi gave way, "What do you think, are you ready?" he asked me and handed me his pistol.
I was reluctant at first. I looked at the pistol in his hand and then looked at him. "Are you sure? What if I do not hit my target and hit Labyrinth instead? Aren't we going to sink?" I asked nervously. I can feel my hands starting to get wet. When the pirates were practicing using their pistols, they did not miss.
Jacob chuckled, "No we will not sink. Just bullet holes," he said and put the gun on my hand.
Lowen took the target and placed it on a plank twenty meters from where I stood. Jacob guided my hands on how to hold the gun, his hands travelled up my arms to straighten them and landed on my shoulders. I felt chills on my spine as he stood behind me. His breath on my ears.
"Calm down, look straight, focus on the target," he said. His lips almost touched my ear. His right hand went back to my hand and guided my pointer finger in the trigger.
I had to take a deep calming breath not only because I was nervous about shooting a gun for the first time but also because Jacob's nearness was sending butterflies in my stomach! I could not concentrate. I looked at my target and tried to focus even if I could feel Jacob's breathing. Then, when I felt like it was the right time, I pulled the trigger.
BANG! I felt the vibration the bullet made as it passed through the barrel. I heard the bullet made contact with the target but it did not topple over. I couldn't help but groan in frustration. I almost forgot Jacob was behind me. I want to hit the target. I shrugged him off of me so he stepped back. I positioned myself again and concentrated. Then, I shoot. It was a clean hit. I couldn't help but smile and I shrieked.
I turned to him and because of my excitement I hugged him, "I did it!!!" I said. I was so ecstatic that it took me a while to notice what I did reflexively and was too late to do anything when Jacob hugged me back.
"Good job," he whispered.
I gasped after realizing what just happened. I felt my ears become warm. I knew they turned pink. I let go of the hug and pushed him mildly. He chuckled and looked at me. I couldn't look back so instead I handed him his pistol back.
"You can have it," he replied. "You need it to practice more," he said then lifted my chin up so I could look him in the eye.
I blushed. I have to quickly think of what to say before he notices that I felt awkward. "Alright, thank you," was the only thing I managed to say. I was about to turn around and leave but Wabi and Puma began teasing.
"Oooooooohhhhhh," they both said before reenacting what just happened.
"I did it!!!" Wabi said and shrieked like a girl. Then, he hugged Puma.
Puma hugged him in return, "Good job."
I knew I was already red like a ripe tomato but they kept on.
Puma took hold of Wabi's chin, "You need to practice more," he imitated Jacob but moved closer to Wabi's face. Their lips only an inch away from each other. Wabi closed his eyes. I gasped.
"Don't make me shoot you," Jacob said, his pistol already pointed at the two pirates.
Puma and Wabi quickly raised both of their hands in surrender. Lowen put his hand on his face and laughed hard. I could not move. I was very embarrassed. Jacob seeing my dilemma looked at me and whispered, "You can leave now, I have them under control."
I do not need to be told twice. I quickly turned around and ran to my quarters. Once I was inside, I quickly closed the door and leaned on it. I shut my eyes to calm down but my mind disagreed with me because it kept replaying what just happened, from his touches when he was showing me how to hold the pistol to the hug then to the reenactment. I felt my cheeks get warmer, "Editha, stop!" I scolded myself. I put the pistol on top of the desk and laid down on the bed. I stared at the ceiling of my quarter. What is going on with me?
*****
"We are running out of provisions," Neville told Jacob after dinner as the pirates were clearing the table.
Paco laid down a map on the table. Elgo and Jacob studied it. I sighed. They seldom use the navigation room. Good thing Paco is always prepared with maps as if he already knew what Jacob is thinking.
They were discussing how we were currently adrift northeast in the Pacube Ocean. "Patomoso is the nearest port," Elgo pointed at the map.
"How many leagues is that?" Neville asked worried about our food supplies.
"One hundred leagues… About three days sail," Jacob responded. "Can we still manage? If not Puma and Wabi can go ahead and start fishing for our food," he said eyeing them knowingly. I wonder if he wanted to punish them for what happened that afternoon.
Neville laughed realizing the meaning of the captain's humor. "We can get by," he answered.
"I'll have them walk the plank then," Jacob teased and winked at me.
"Captain…" they both whined at the same time. "... we apologized already."
"Captain, you said Patomoso, correct?" Thaddaeus asked in a baritone voice.
"Yes, why?"
Thaddaeus looked at Lowen, "Isn't that where your hometown is?" he asked.
Lowen smiled his usual smile as a response and nodded.
"When was the last time you went back?" I can't help but ask.
Lowen turned to me. "This will be the first if we dock there in three days," he answered then beamed.
"You must be excited," I said.
Lowen looked down and frowned for a moment. That was the first time I saw him make that expression. Then, he sighed and smiled, "Not really…" he replied.
"Ohhh…" I said and looked at Jacob. He was studying Lowen before he turned to me. He rested his face on his fist and stared.
I raised my eyebrows and accepted his challenge so I stared back. The crew looked at us back and forth before Laurel broke the silence and began teasing, "Let the staring contest begin! Who wants to make a bet?" he said,
Jacob looked at him warningly, "You want to walk the plank with Puma and Wabi? I have enough musicians on board anyways," he said.
"No thank you, Captain," he answered singsongy.
Jacob went back to staring at me. I had to divert the topic or else his crew will tease us senseless. "Isn't Patomoso one of Beckforth overseas territories?"
"Yes, why do you ask?" Jacob answered.
"Are we going to meet someone like Governor Victorino again?"
"Lowen?" Jacob turned to Lowen.
Lowen shook his head. "Unlike Canupeer, Patomoso is too far from Beckforth. After making Patomoso a territory, they appointed the Monroe family to govern it. The Monroe's lived in Patomoso for generations."
"How about overtaxing and selling people as slaves?" I asked again.
"The last time I was there, we did not have that. As long as Patomoso can give its annual tax quota to Beckforth, Beckforth didn't mind. Although the tax was still high. But then again, that was a long time ago. I do not know how it is at this time," Lowen explained.
"That does not sound promising. How long were you gone?" I replied.
"Almost five years," Lowen answered.
I sighed. I couldn't help but worry. That was a long time ago. Canupeer changed after a short while. I must admit I do not feel excited.
I think Jacob noticed my worry so he said, "Don't worry your pretty little head, Darling. If something goes wrong, I will rescue you. Plus, I do not think it will be easy to harm you this time. You're feisty with the pistol."
"Did she shoot a pistol yet?" Paco asked.
"Yes," Puma replied then he smiled teasingly. "Then, she got overly excited. Huh, Wabi?" he said and elbowed Wabi. Wabi was about to say something but I answered first.
"Oh be quiet Puma, I am not the one who almost kissed Wabi, am I?" I retorted. I won't allow them to embarrass me again.
The whole crew looked at them both, curiosity in their eyes, "What is going on?" Urdel asked.
"But it was only to--" Wabi tried to explain but the whole crew was already joining in the teasing.
"YOU ALMOST KISSED PUMA?" Thom asked. "How desperate are you, mate?"
I giggled. What goes around comes around. "Their lips were just one more inch away. It was that close… and Wabi closed his eyes, huh Jacob?" I added. I turned to Jacob and smiled at him too sweetly.
Jacob understood what I am doing so he joined in, "Don't you worry we are docking at Patomoso soon. There will be a lot of women there," he teased.
"CAPTAIN!!!!" Puma and Wabi screamed at the same time.
That didn't help because Thaddaeus observed. "Whoa, you two are completely in sync," he said.
The teasing continued after that. I made my way out of the kitchen onto the deck to escape it. There might be a chance that they will tease me back. I inhaled the scent of the waters again. I will never get tired of how the sea smells. The serenity of the sea calmed me down. I closed my eyes.
"Is everything alright?"
I already knew it was Jacob. "Uh huh," I mumbled, my eyes remained closed.
There was a deafening silence after. I was curious if Jacob had already left so I opened my eyes. There he was by my side. He was watching me with a studying gaze. I felt my cheeks get warm so I looked away.
"Can I help you?" I asked.
I saw from the corner of my eye that he smiled, then looked at the sea. "When are you going to tell me your name?"
"Why do you insist?"
"Do you really like it when I call you, Darling?" he said then smirk.
"I already said I'm used to it," I answered.
He raised his left brow, his smirk not leaving his face, "Then should I call you MY Darling?"
I frowned at him but I won't be irritated or else he wins. "I am NOT YOURS though," I retorted and smiled too sweetly.
He looked back at me and stepped forward leaning towards me. Our faces just a few inches away, "Should I make you mine then?" he asked.
My mind went completely blank. I am not sure if he is teasing me but his face exudes seriousness. I did not move, he inched a little closer. His lips just a breath away. His actions took me by surprise. I immediately turned around and ran to my quarter. That night, I could not sleep.
*****
Three days passed by quickly. I tried to avoid Jacob as much as possible. Every time I saw him on those days, I would go the other way. I busied myself with target practice. I ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner later or earlier just to make sure that I did not see him. It's not that I do not want to see him, it is because after that night, I do not know how to act around him. Every time my eyes catch where he was, my heart would beat faster and faster.
I think he understood because he did not pester me. After docking in Patomoso port, the pirates went their separate ways to get the provisions we need to continue our journey. I went with Lowen this time. We were walking towards the city's trade center laughing and having a conversation when he suddenly changed his expression. His eyes were fixed onto someone. I followed his gaze and saw a woman in a white dress walking across us. She, too, was looking at Lowen. When our paths met, she looked at me and gave me a sad smile and turned to Lowen.
"Lowen, you're back," she said in a quiet voice.
Lowen did not smile. Instead, his face showed a pained expression. There, for the first time, I saw his honest reaction.
"Carole…" he uttered.