Sung-ho Perspective
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"I knew you would be here." Without batting an eye, the boy exclaims while fiddling at the familiar tablet in his hands.
The gadget is as wide as the table chair while it puts me aback by such broad technology in front of me. However, I also have this drawing tablet back at my house in Korea before moving out and living here in Japan. It was a priceless tool that helped live throughout the pain.
Now that I do not have it with me, there is nothing else I have felt but agony through my skin.
My eyes widen as the teen lifts his head and reveals his recognisable features. The pitch-black spiky hair pointing upwards and his bangs are the only things different from his appearance. He even wears an obsidian vest, like a jacket, imitating my looks when I was still his age.
That clothing is not something he wore when he was still seven years ago.
"Seo-jun, I-," Before I could speak my words, my brother stands up from the chair and cuts me off, while glaring at me with cold and piercing eyes. I feel like there is an invisible tension appearing in front of us.
The air between us becomes icy and warm, as if two opposite rivers are running at each other. I feel cold feet to express another sentence since this is the first time meeting Seo-jun after seven years of hiding from reality.
Upon glancing at the screen, I see an illustration of a flock gliding at the blue sky. With intricate lines, I feel a sense of confidence observing the sketch.
"These birds feel free and everlasting, unlike an image that I know about in the past." I think to myself while resuming the conversation.
"I like your drawing." My eyes stare at the gadget and return to observe the image of my brother.
Seo-jun places the tablet on the board and takes a glimpse at his work before reverting his look to me. His teary eyes hide behind his socket, concealing the frightened yet berserk behaviour with hatred dwelling inside him.
I take a step forward, wanting to close the gap between the brother I have feared and loved. However, with a wave of his hand, he stops me from my tracks and shouts the words he wants to tell.
"Why did you leave me?" His soft voice feels deafening inside my lungs. Seo-jun refuses to meet with my orbs.
"Why did you leave me, brother?" Seo-jun repeats to himself, still with his eyes looking at the ground.
My brother refuses to look me in the eye, and it was the same as before I left my home.
I never want that to happen to him again.
All I yearn for the past seven years is to force him to grow from his comfort zone. I want him to protect himself in times of danger. I want him to instil confidence and take pride in his work, both in business and the hobbies that he loves, and yet he stays the same.
Seo-jun is still the shy and ignorant person from before-.
Like a truck hitting me head-on, my body tumbles on the ground. I feel a surging and excruciating pain over my cheeks, unable to feel my head for a second. Every touch on my face makes my heart scream in agony, and I wish to end my suffering already.
Seo-jun retracts his fist out of pity after hitting me. Upon raising my head, I notice pinkish spots shading his knuckles, showing the impact and strength he has used to knock me down on the ground. There is a pint of blood sliding through the tips of his fingernails.
Seo-jun, too, is in pain.
Moments later, the glasses in his eyes fall on the ground and shatter the crystal shards around us. We are lucky to avoid injuries from the accident because Seon-jun needs to kiss his glasses goodbye and buy a fresh pair of lenses if he still wants to wear one tomorrow.
"You fucker!" Seo-jun shouts.
His aura changes into something sinister that makes my brother a different person from earlier. Despite his black pupils, I can sense a hint of crimson colour bathing in his eyes as a mark of anger boiling inside his sockets. He crumples his hands and shapes them like a ball, ready to swing at me anytime he wishes to hurt me.
My brother rushes in my direction and punches me multiple times in every part of my body. My hands move in defence and safeguard my vital points as I could not fight back against him.
A tremendous force pushes me backwards, making me jerk at the sides to avoid the further assault. However, when another batter hits me, I cough out a sprinkle of blood on my jacket.
I could not hit him, even if I wanted to hurt him. Why would I?
It is because Seo-jun is still my brother, and I will take all the blame with me to my grave. Each time I look him in the eyes, my hands wish to return his pounds; but I could not.
"Why did you not show up during my birthdays when you gave me a present!" Seo-jun glides his hands and slaps me.
I know my little brother. It is because I want you to feel happy with the remaining days staying by your side.
"Why did you leave me without telling me any goodbyes!" My brother hits me again, this time in the abdomen. My body reacts as I cough out my saliva inside my mouth.
I know, my little brother, since it is hard for you if you knew I was to leave you behind.
After receiving his blitz, Seo-jun smacks his hand back at my face, making me look at the right side of the room. The tablet on the table falls off on the ground beside the glasses. Its screen flashes in front of me and lets me recall the day I gave him that drawing tool.
"Why did you teach me how to draw when you could not even see it!" Seo-jun loses all of his energy, with his attacks ending. His eyes are staring at the marbled floor like a tiger that has caught his prey glaring and observing me.
"Have you ever read all those sketches?" The salted rain hits and wets my face. I could taste the bitterness from the words coming from his mouth. "Did you even know I became a mangaka for you!"
But I take them all into my heart while feeling uncertain about what to say about my wailing brother.
I thought that was the last time he would attack me. But Seo-jun bombards my face with another thrash. A tooth even falls beside me, with my eyes wallowing in pain. Upon palpating my eyes, I could feel that my muscles feel and become tense. It is now a purple and black colour around my skin.
The blows feel infinite, and time moves slow. Not until a figure grabs Seo-jun around his waist and stops him from strafing me.
"That is enough, Seo-jun!" Her hair flutters as Yuki drags the frenzied expression of my brother.
Fortunately for her, Seo-jun's will to fight leaves his arms and resumes glaring at me with chilling eyes.
The painful look damages my heart, but I still want him to touch my feelings.
"It is alright, Yuki." Although unexpected, Nickson must have known Yuki in his schooldays.
My hand reaches inside my coat and reveals the books I have been reading to pass the never-ending time. Three volumes slam the floor with their pages, revealing wrinkled sheets of paper.
"Open it." My voice reaches out to his ears as I see him extend his fingers and pick up the papers. It is the last ounce of strength I could muster to talk to him.
As soon as he unfolds the page, he reveals the familiar drawings and sketches before him.
Seo-jun swipes his hand and feels the rough surface of the pages. Upon touching the paper, he recognises these parts come from the manga he has made not too long ago. The coal-black ink paints his eyes as if it is the only image that he could see.
My brother takes the cut sheets and flickers through the pages. Every page resembles different stories and boxes from the ones he draws. At the bottom of the page, Seo-jun sees his name with a signature on top.
{To my dearest brother}
Seo-jun lifts his head and finally looks straight at me in the eyes. He rinses his eyes with the tears dripping from his lids. It is the first time that I have seen him cry after all the years we have spent together as brothers.
A homely liquid skids through my face and eventually lands on the paper in my hand. It is my only prize that I keep with me during my darkest days when I feel all hope has lost within me.
"I could not afford to buy your mangas, webtoons, comics, and all of those. I got bankrupt, and my members and I had to close our company down until further notice. There was nothing left I could do, so I stole your work from every store, wanting to read the latest edition of your stories," I continue.
I concede the paper in my hands to him, the thing I always protect as a part of my body.
Seo-jun takes the sheet off from my hand and witnesses two young boys clutching their arms together. The two images resemble our looks since it is the cover of his unfinished manga on the internet. It even has the long-forgotten smile of the brother I lost for a couple of years, and now he is here in front of me.
The page in his fingers bends as the tears falling from his eyes soak the illustration. But I want to preserve the sketch and find my hands shielding the pad. Despite fluid splashing my palm, I cry out for that drawing to last forever.
"I never wanted to leave you. But if I were to stay, our mother will force you to do something that I will hate."
Seo-jun shakes his head and denies what I have said. I feel a gentle push from his hands, but I grab him before he could stand and walk away.
"I hope you could understand and forgive me." A mumbling and shaking voice flees from my vocal cords. It is the only words I want to say and the only phrase Seo-jun yearns to hear.