Standing within the expanding expanse of my soul, a tainted black and scarlet, I gazed at what seemed to resemble the nervous system. Glistering with multicolored light, I stood spellbound within my core.
None of this had hurt as Zax had said it would, but when that explosion sounded within the North Gate, I was dragged into my soul's depths. I don't even know the state of my body. If I was not in control, would my baser instincts be? Or am I just laying in a puddle, drooling on myself? God, I hope that's not the case; that would be so humiliating.
Clearing my throat in my spiritual form, I gazed out at the storm of colors lighting up one after the other in such an intricate way I felt almost spellbound to watch, trying to grasp the complexity of my soul.
Was everyone's soul like mine, or did they see something else?
Trying not to waste time, I floated forward, hoping I was heading deeper into my soul. It's kind of sad that I can't even tell where I was going in my soul. But I guess everyone needs a weakness. At least it's not a significant Achilles heel.
Traveling the seemingly infinite reaches of my soul, I occasionally touch upon the nerves or project my intent on them, forcing them to reveal some of the memories and feelings I held. The time Sitri took Lilith, the time I entered Midgard, the day Bael killed my parents only to be revived by Levi.
It was quite a wild trip to go down memory lane, seeing all I had to deal with—both the good and the bad. Finding all these memories seemingly not in order and sort of fragmented, yet connected somehow or another, I proceeded deeper in till the lights above me slowly began to fade, little by little.
Zax had said I needed to find a glimmer of Astral force or perish. But how does one do so when the soul itself is infinitely wide, as it is vast?
And as my Divine Sense comes from my soul, it doesn't work in my soul. Annoyed as I was growing angry, I could only float mindlessly through my memories. Years seemed to skim by as I slowly began to notice something happening to my spiritual form.
It was losing its luster. I was dying, but there was nothing I could do but soar at the fastest pace possible through the infinite landscape of my soul.
I rushed past the almost endless fragmented memories of my many lifetimes, some of which showed me some of the worst things while others portrayed me as a saint. At some point in my many lifetimes, I was both a vilest of villains and the greatest of heroes, a shame I took the Villan Path. I always wondered what it would be like to be a hero. To be so self-centered, I kill more people than I save in the name of someone else's justice.
Was having empathy so great? Was it a necessity? Looking at all these memories, I saw my past selves who lived as heroes appear sad or tired. Was it so rewarding? If I had power, why should I help others? Why should I risk my life for randoms? Why should I sacrifice my life to make others feel good? It just doesn't make sense to me. Was it so wrong to be selfish? If I were a hero, I'd be killing all my enemies.
Pondering the difference between right and wrong for the next few hundred thousand years, I found myself lost in the concept of morality. And whether it was relevant in modern times or if such a concept was simply there to make others feel good about themselves.
Killing time with such a brain teaser, I found myself gazing at a large storm crackling with scarlet and gold arcs releasing a soul-crushing pressure that weight heavily on my soul.
Staring at the storm that, in a way, was staring back at me, a soft calling sensation whispered into my ear. But I could not move. Under this horrendous pressure holding me in place, my thoughts slowed, and my spiritual body lost even more of its luster.
"BE MY DISCIPLE, AND I SHALL SAVE HIM!"A sinister voice, powerful and grand, regal and domineering, erupted in my mind like a faded memory, "BEND YOU'RE KNEE FORSAKEN! AND I WILL GRANT YOU POWER TO FELL THE NIGHT!"
My heart hammered like drums, and I felt myself shake with unease as the lazy eyes of a blurred figure seared their way into my mind. Unable to place the name or the face, I stood shaken for gods knows how long.
By the time I came to, I felt my mobility had returned, but the state of my soul had diminished into that of a few embers barely flickering with light, "Who! NO! no time to think of that! I need to move!" Dashing into the storm that felt like the abyss and night, I dared not stop as I weaved through what seemed like a maze. I continued with all I had before the light of my soul burned away; my eyes soon became locked upon a crest.
My Crest! That blazed with a scarlet, black glow, and by its side, I saw… I saw myself standing there, with a smile, as he gazed at me.
"That lucky bastard Zariel did it, didn't he." The other me said, resting in the lotus position; he rose to his feet. "You have no idea how lucky you are."
"You're?" I started to say, unsure what type of beast was before me. I was sure I got rid of any other entity living within me. An Aegis had confirmed that when I granted him a body and a mission."
"The Forsaken are all born without Astral Force; that is why Zariel didn't have any nor my little sister." He said, tracing his gaze back to my Crest. " When Zariel gave me some of his Astral Essense alongside the rest of The Order, all of us poured a part of our souls into the Astral Essense just in case. Something happened. Zero, that cautious bastard really does have some wild foresight. Although I don't think he planned for this."
"You're the old me who died," I muttered, and he turned back to me and nodded.
"Indeed." He calmly said, bitterness filling his golden eyes."We have much to discuss, but it would seem you have very little time."