I felt like I was floating in water. It was cold and dark. The eerie quiet of it had me trembling more than the temperature.
Rylee: Dante.
I cried out. But my voice had no sound. I tried to move but my body was weighed down by the water as if there were invisible ropes holding me down. Suddenly I was startled by the sound of movement in the water. Like someone swimming toward me. I turned my head slightly to the side. There was a bright light behind the image of a woman. It looked like the moon touching the horizon of a blackened lake. The image came closer and her face became visible.
Rylee: Mom.
She flashed her knowing kind smile.
Mom: It's not your time my curious kitten.
She leaned over kissing my forehead and I suddenly felt my chest implode. My body lifted from the water as thousands of electrical currents ripped through me causing the water to ripple.
Rylee: Mom!
I screamed as she treaded backward and faded into the light.
Another implosion jolted my body out of the water and my lungs filled with air as if I had been drowning. My head fell back hitting something harder than water. There was a light above me and a few dark images hovering over me with rapid beeping echoing behind me.
Woman's voice: She's back with us.
Dr.Lynn: Emma
Dr. Lynn's soft voice and sweet smile brought me to reality. I was in a hospital.
Rylee: The baby
I tried to whisper but something was blocking my throat. I tried to grab at what ever it was stuck to my face when a hand grabbed hold of my wrist. I tried to resist as panic set in.
Dr.Lynn: Emma, you have a breathing tube in your throat, you're in the OR at St. Francis. You lost a lot of blood but we've stopped the bleeding. Nod if you understand.
I nod as tears seep out the corner of my eyes. The Image of Mark punching me in the stomach with his casted hand forces me to acknowledge my stupidity. I had been lucky. Too lucky since my first kill. I got greedy and cocky. I should have known better. People like Mark. He lived in the shadows. Always watching and observing.
Dr.Lynn: We're going to set you up in ICU and we'll get that tube removed ok.
I nodded. My lower body felt numb and that's when I saw in the reflection of the light red and orange smears across my belly with black crosses and several silver staples in a line. More tears flooded my eyes. I couldn't breath. I tried again to pull at the shit taped to my face. I needed this thing off. The beeping grew more rapid as my chest tightened. The dr shouted something cc morphine stat. I watched as a nurse plunged a needle in a catheter in my hand. A coldness ran through my veins as a medicated taste creeped up the back of my throat. My lids grew heavy as darkness took me once more.
De ja vu. Two hands were wrapped tightly around mine as heated breath brushed across my knuckles and a voice whispered a silent prayer. Only it wasn't Gram this time. My eyes fluttered open to see Dante's sleepless rugged face. Suddenly Grams image appears out of know where behind him. Dante looks up. His eyes are blood shot and glossed over but he doesn't falter when his smile spreads ear to ear flashing me a dimple that causes me to smile. I look past him at Gram who leaned over with blood shot eyes of his own and kissed my forehead. Then stepped back giving Dante room.
Rylee: I'm sorry
I mustard a dry groggy breath as the tears swelled again.
Dante: Ssshhh..
He leaned over kissing my dry cracked lips. Then returned his lips to my knuckles and just stared at me in silence. After a long while the silence was interrupted by a knock on the door. James back filled the door frame as he opened the door for Dr. Lynn. Her eyes landed on Gram first offering a small smile before looking down at me as she made her way to the bed.
Dr. Lynn: How do you feel Emma.
She puts two fingers on the inside of my wrist checking my pulse manually.
Rylee: Like my insides were ripped out of me and my heart has been trampled.
She kept her smile plastered like a Dr but I could see in her eyes the personal pain she felt. Her and Gram were getting closer making us feel more and more like family.
Dr. Lynn: What is your pain level righty now between 1 and 10
Rylee: 5
It was higher but I didn't want to be doped up on morphine. I needed to keep my wits about me. I know I killed Mark but I was vulnerable. Even with Dante's men. Being laid up in a hospital was like signing a death warrant. She looked me in the eyes with a squint.
Dr. Lynn: I know you are being stubborn. But right now is not the time. Providing the correct amount pain meds will help relax your muscles so that your body can start healing. I'd say your pretty safe considering the entire hospital is heavily guarded. Do you want to tell me the truth.
I've been shot and had no hospital and nothing more than some Tylenol 3. I wasn't about to budge. I shook my head, and she let out a knowing huff.
Dr. Lynn: If your heart monitor goes up any higher than it is right now I will up your morphine even if I have to hold you down and administer it myself.
I replied with a challenging look and smirk. I'd like to see her try. She raised her brow and glares at me as if she would take that challenge. Gram cleared his throat as he walked around putting a hand on Dr.Lynn's arm and escorted her out.
Dante: She's right baby. There's not a chance in hell anyone could get to you because I will never leave your side again.
Rylee: You can't be at my side 24/7. It's physically impossible.
Dante: Watch me.
I rolled my eyes at him. But my heart, though hurting for the loss of the baby it still beats for him.
Dante: What happened baby.
I looked away from his taunting eyes. He wanted to know how it happened. Why it happened.
Rylee: I lost our baby.
His fingers slid across my jaw and pulled me to look at him.
Dante: You can't blame your self. We always knew of the probability. Who's to say it wouldn't have still happened in some other random freak accident. What if it would have happened while your were alone somewhere and I was away on business. We wouldn't be having this conversation!
He wiped my tears with his thumb and kissed my lips.
Rylee: Why do you always want to know the details of things. I hated a lot of the things I've done to get to where I am and I hate the idea of you knowing things that could make you see me different.
Dante: I could never look at you different. I know your reasons. I know that none of it meant anything to you. But that sick fuck thought it meant something. He had a shrine with pictures of you. He had fake ids ready. He was going to take you. I just want some sort of closure I guess to how he took our baby away from us.
Rylee: It should have been an easy take down. His right hand was busted up as you obviously know. So it was a no brainer that he wasn't going to be able to use the gun with his left. Besides his hand was shaking. I realized the mistake I had made when he started talking crazy. But I had made an even bigger mistake when I took him down I left my self wide open. He took the opening and slammed the casted fist into my stomach. I knew right away. The pain was excruciating. The fucker had the audacity to come to me with concern when I hit the floor. All I saw was red, I was temporarily fueled by raw anger. I can barely remember grabbing my knife and stabbing him.
My heart rate monitor was beeping fast. I tried to hold my crying back but my body began to tremble and the pain flew off the scale.
Rylee: It's all my fault. I made the wrong move.
Dante: Sshhh baby. No.
Dr. Lynn came rushing back into the room. It didn't even trigger what she was doing until my eye lids grew heavy again and my body went numb.
Rylee: No
I tried to cry out. But it was too late. The drugs knocked me out cold. When I woke up I was in a different room. A sliver of light was piercing through a blue curtain casting a golden haze over Dante's frame stretched out beside me. Gram was asleep in a chair in the corner next to the bed. James was passed out in another chair next to the door. A special kind of warmth filled my lungs with fresh air as I drew in the sight. These men loved me all in their own way and I loved them. I may have only known James a short while but he was just like Gram in so many ways as if he was him from another mother. Dante my lover, Gram my second father, and James the caring friend. He was closer to Grams age but he was Dante's best friend.
He must have felt me looking at him because one eye popped open and he smiled.
James: Want me to get the nurse.
He said as quiet as he could trying not to wake Dante and Gram while standing to stretch. But Dante shot his head up looking me over to see if I was ok.
Rylee: No it's ok James.
He nodded and walked out of the room. Dante kissed my forehead.
Dante: Are you alright.
Rylee: Yes.
I tried to look over at Gram but Dante was blocking my view. When I heard a muffled snore I wanted to laugh but the slightest movement felt like a knife jabbing me in the gut.
Rylee: Is he alright.
Dante: Yeah he's alright. He and the Doc got into a little lovers spat over how much morphine she gave you. He wanted to take you out of here and honestly I was right behind him on that idea. She eventually calmed him down promising to get you moved to this private room on another floor. Once we got settled in she brought him some tea and he passed right out.
Rylee: She drugged Gram right in front of you.
Dante: She swears it was just chamomile night time tea. All natural. No drugs.
Rylee: Did you drink it too.
Dante: No. I only just fell asleep before sun up.
Rylee: He's going to be pissed when he wakes up.
Gram: Normally I would be. How you doing kid.
His groggy voice carried over Dante's shoulder as he stands, rubbing a hand over his face.
Rylee: I'm ok. You?
He chuckles and walks over to the opposite side of the bed taking my hand I his.
Gram: Don't worry about me. The doc and I are fine.
I give him a questioning look. There's a knock on the door but they don't wait for a reply. James follows Dr.Lynn in holding tray of coffees. Dante slowly rolls off the bed trying not to disrupt me to much with the movement. James hands him a coffee and one to Gram. Then he looks at Dr.Lynn silently asking if he can give one to me. She nods and he hands it to Dante to hold while the doctor examines me. All three of them stand around sipping there coffee waiting for her to finish.
Dr.Lynn: I know you all want her to go home but I need her on I.V meds for another 24 hours to keep her from going into septic shock from possibly secondary infection. Then she can go home on oral meds but only if it is a calm relaxed and clean environment.
She shoots daggers at Gram and Dante.
Dante nods and raises his hands in surrender at her glare. Once the doctor leaves James hands Gram a phone and whispers something to Dante and walks back out of the room. Gram kisses my forehead.
Gram: I'll see you later.
Dante hands me the coffee and pulls the chair all the way up to the bed.
Rylee: What's going on?
Dante: Nothing!
Just then a nurse comes in to offer a small list of things I can chose from to eat.