Before I even reach the lounge the door goes for a third time tonight. I swear, if this isn't my pizza, and more importantly my Prosecco then I think I may just lose the plot and scream!
I swipe up the cash I'd dropped onto the side table and wrench the front door open, almost physically assaulting the poor delivery driver. I grab the box and bag from his grip and bark a gruff 'Thanks, bye' slamming the door closed, a little more aggressive than required. I put the bag down and open the door, shouting a feeble apology of 'sorry, jet lag!' at his retreating form.
"Yeah, whatever lunatic" he replies, increasing his pace in an attempt to reach his vehicle as quickly as possible.
After closing the door again and retrieving the bag from its place at my feet I head into the lounge, and am confronted with the surreal vision of Laura on one sofa, eyes agog, focussed on the 2 almost identical faces opposite her.
'Left' Yanni is slouched back in his seat, one foot up on his opposite knee, arm slung along the back of the couch and studying his fingernails with the most bored expression on his face.
'Right' Yanni looks less comfortable, sitting stiffly, hands on his rapidly bouncing knees and a sadness in his eyes that incidentally haven't left my face since I entered the room.
Until this very moment I hadn't noticed their differences which are almost imperceptible. Sitting here now there are many obvious differences between the twins.
'Left' Yannis jaw is more chiselled, his eyes are slightly closer together and cold. He has a mole beside his left eye! His eyebrows are bushier, his nose a little wider and he has a smug air about him.
'Right' Yanni has no mole, a softer but still defined jawline, higher cheekbones and his ears are a little out of line . He also has the most gloriously green sparkling eyes that are now smiling at me, although his face has remained impassive.
I put the box and bag on the table and sit beside Laura, immediately reaching for a bottle of Prosecco,
offering it across the table in general, already knowing in my heart which of these two men is Yanni but wanting some kind of visual confirmation.
"Open this please Yanni" I request.
Yanni on the right leans forward and takes the bottle.
I knew it!
'Right' Yanni is the right Yanni! The 'Right' Yanni is my Yanni.
MY YANNI!!
That epiphany causes the air to leave my lungs, and then I'm certain the room too. I feel that he belongs to me. He is mine. Well, not quite, but I know that I'd like him to be. Mine. I want to claim him as my own, to have him to myself, spend my time with him, do nothing with him, share my thoughts and fears with him. I want to make memories with him, remember happy events together. I want to ask him for his advice, but also to help him with his problems and difficulties, be there for him through the good and the bad experiences life throws at him. I just want to be with him. I want to inspire him as he inspires me, and I also want to protect him, to fight for him. I think about some of the ways I could fix any fight we may have, all of them explicitly obscene, and all hugely arousing to the point where I'm hoping for a fight with him soon so we can move on to the making up! Oh my God, make up sex with Yanni Smith. That will surely be the most pleasure I could ever feel. I realise that I have developed those feelings that Yanni suspects of me. I want him. I want him to want me. I want him to be mine! I think I lo.... no, let's not jump into that particular pond. I've known him 3 months, I can't feel that way for him. It's not possible, besides, it's madness to even think about a relationship with anyone, I'm just not ready.... but oh my God, I have missed sex so much!! Oh, that few minutes on the sofa with his firm and needy body above mine, the tastes of his tongue in my mouth, the feel of his hands on my body and warm softness of his lips on my skin, the feral sounds his throat made when he felt good. Amazing! I've never felt so turned on and desired in my life. I felt special!
Phew... cold shower required!!
A pattern that is now so obvious to me I'm almost embarrassed it's taken me so long to notice it emerges.
The first Yanni I met when I fell into his lap in the minibus, and who led the legal ambush in the hotel room on the day of the fan sign was unpleasant.
Yanni who cared for me on the plane after I hit my head.... nice.
Yanni at the hospital.... not nice, quite aggressive in fact.
Yanni who spoke to me as I left for my date with Jimmie.... very nice, complimentary and sweet, but the one who confronted us when we got home, anything but nice!
Nice Yanni has no mole beside his eye. Mean Yanni does!
If this was a true crime documentary I was watching on TV I would have noticed that before now. I'm embarrassed, but my over riding emotion right now is anger.
What the hell is this all about? Why hide a twin? What is to be gained from it for either of them? I don't understand.
Yanni has poured 2 glasses of Prosecco and I hand one to him and the other to Laura, then crook my finger at 'left' Yanni indicating he follow me into the kitchen. He sighs and follows me like a petulant child. I turn to look at him once we reach the kitchen,
"You can introduce yourself to me properly, you already know my name and so have me at a bit of a disadvantage, and I don't like that" I scold.
He trains his cold eyes on my face and stares blankly for a few seconds only but it feel like hours, before uttering just one word, his tone completely flat.
"Vinni"
That's it! Nothing else, no smile, no offer of a handshake, no attempt at a hug, no further details about himself. Zero, Nada, Amugeosdo.... Zilch!!
Arrogant bastard! He doesn't need to speak for me to figure him out.
Fine, he doesn't want to talk, neither do I.
I stalk back into the lounge with the 2 extra plates and glasses, placing the plates with the others and handing the glasses directly to Yanni who fills them both, first handing one to me as I retake my seat next to Laura, then hands the other to his brother who again sits beside him.
Laura has started plating pizza and passing them out without comment. The tension in the room is palpable, I can almost feel it weighing on my shoulders, my appetite now non existent! I drain my glass and pour the last of the first bottle into my empty glass, downing that too.
"Well??! Who's going to start?!" I grunt, fighting to get the cork out of the second bottle, and failing! Placing the bottle between my knees I put both thumbs on the cork and push with all my might. Yanni begins to speak,
"Erm..... Sydney, you might want to point that..."
"AAAAARRRGGGHHH!!! FUCK!!! Shit, what the hell? Aaaaargh Jesus! You fucking bitch, you did that on purpose didnt you!" Screams Vinni, leaping up and staggering into the kitchen, closely followed by Laura who gestures at me from behind Yannis back suggesting we talk.
"So, did you?" he questions with a smirk on his face.
Not understanding him I ask "Did I what?"
"Deliberately shoot my brother in the face with a Prosecco cork?"
"I didn't, but kinda wish I had! What's his deal? In fact, what the hell is any of this? Why have you kept him a secret from me for three months, and why have you kept it from me at all??!! Why is he a secret, and why does he pretend to be you sometimes? What possible reason could you have for that, we've lived together for weeks, how did you manage not to be seen together?! The other guys know about this too I presume! Shit!! You must all be enjoying the joke right?! I'm what, 'The idiot Pom journo who thinks she's shit hot, but can't even discover that the man she's falling for is a fucking twin!!'?" I seethe, swiftly pouring myself another glass of the bubbly wine in an attempt to distract him from that unplanned admission. I try to top up Yannis glass too but he declines by placing a hand over the glass and shakes his head. He doesn't seem to have noticed what I said, his face is expressionless as he says,
"I need to be sober to say all this. You should drink yours though, you might want to be drunk to hear it"
Sitting forward on my seat I put down my glass and look at him. I definitely do not want to be drunk if he is going to explain what the hell is going on here.
"Ok..... go!!" I suggest, picking up a slice of pizza, I have a feeling this could be a long conversation. Yanni shrugs off his coat and begins to speak