Shirou had never felt so free in his short life.
They had been traveling through the wilderness for about five days already. In total, it had been about a month and 2 weeks since they first left Tokyo. There was still not a single sign of the government.
"Where do you think we are?" Shirou asked Sakusei
Sakusei pulled a map out of a backpack that Shirou created.
She stared intently at the map.
"We are...or we should be about 40 miles east of Tokyo."
Along with controlling the Essence, Sakusei had also taught Shirou basic conversational skills, such as asking for things, making eye contact, and to some extent, how to smile, although it looks extremely fake when he does.
He could now hold a small conversation with those around him.
"Shouldn't the government have found us by now?" Shirou asked.
"They should have...I don't know why they haven't. But the further we can get, the better, so don't worry about it."
They walked for a while longer, until they came up on a spot.
"KANASHIII!"
Kanashi, having not completely gotten over their argument, refused to walk with them. She remained at least 1000 feet behind them at all times, only coming close to eat.
Just then, they heard rustling from behind a bush, and a small girl emerged.
"What?"
Sakusei pointed down to the spot below them.
"We found our spot."
It was an open field, surrounded by rocky hills on either side.
"Is this where we're supposed to sleep?! We'll be right out in the open," Kanashi said, astounded.
"Not sleeping. This is where Shirou will master Anger."
Anger...Shirou thought back to that night. He had the strong urge to just up and run away, hearing that.
"Don't worry. It will be different this time," she said, looking at him.
They stood in the center of the rocky field. Sakusei was about 15 feet away from Shirou, staring intensely at him.
"When using Anger, it is quite easy to unconsciously sacrifice all your emotions, which is what led to what happened that night."
Shirou swallowed.
"That is what we want to avoid. So first, start by making a taser or something like a bat."
Shirou looked at her, confused.
"So I can knock you out if it gets out of control. But anyways…"
It was clear that she wanted to skip this subject. After Shirou made a taser, she continued.
"Start by thinking about something that makes you mad. It doesn't have to be big."
There was nothing. Nothing except that night.
Never again…
"I don't have anything. Nothing makes me angry."
Sakusei sighed.
"I knew this would happen."
She walked until she was about two feet away from him.
"Imagine this. The government has found us. We managed to get separated in the chaos."
Sakusei began walking in circles around him.
"You can't seem to find me or Kanashi. You start to freak out."
Shirou's eyes widened.
"You run and run and run...until you find us. We are lying on the ground..."
She got so close Shirou could feel her breath on his ear.
"...Dead."
The ground cracked under their feet. Sakusei jumped back a bit, surprised.
"...Kill them," Shirou whispered.
He was breathing heavily.
"I'll kill them, I'll-"
Shirou let out a gasp as a hot, burning pain spread from his back, all around his body. After a few seconds, he slumped over, unconscious.
Caught in his emotions, he didn't expect a taser.
"...mhmm... Wha happen…"
Shirou felt a heavenly soft sensation under his head.
So warm…
He rolled over onto his right side.
"Hey, um. What'cha doing?"
"Huh?"
He opened his eyes, to be greeted by the sight of someone's mid-section.
These clothes. Sakusei?
He sat up and looked at her.
"Why was I laying on your thighs?"
She looked noticeably embarrassed.
"U-um well you know, it just happened to be the way you, u-um, passed out."
Very convincing.
They sat for a couple minutes.
"Do you want to try again?" Sakusei asked.
I don't.
"Sure."
This is necessary to survive, right?
Shirou stood up, ignoring his true emotions.
The cycle of imagining, losing control, and tasing repeated over again.
After hours and hours of training, Shirou had made no process, only gaining a bunch of bruises from getting tased.
"This isn't going to work," Sakusei said, clutching her temples.
I knew this was pointless.
Shirou felt disappointed. He must protect Sakusei, so why can't he?
He came to a realization.
Did I ever have any hope in the first place?
Shirou thought back to all the times that he felt pain, sadness, happiness, or really any emotion.
Why do I feel these things? If I'm meant to protect, isn't that all I need?
He felt hopeless.
"Let's try again tomorrow."
It had already gotten dark, so they headed into the forest, where they could start a camp.
To their surprise, Kanashi was waiting for them in the spot they had designated.
Sakusei smiled.
"Did you get lonely?" She said sarcastically.
Kanashi blushed, and then looked away.
"O-Of course not. I just didn't feel like making my own camp."
"You don't have to lie," Shirou said.
"I'M NOT!"
She actually looked upset, so they decided to stop teasing her.
After they settles down and started a fire, Shirou asked what he assumed everyone else was thinking.
"How's this all going to end?"
No one really knew an answer.
"I guess we'll have to just wait and see. I mean, what else can we do?" Sakusei said after a couple of seconds.
Shirou felt overwhelmed. It felt as though the impact of everything he had been through had suddenly been dropped on him.
But along with this feeling, another feeling rose up.
I must protect them.
He stared up at the sky, slowly dozing off into a light, restless sleep.