Sarah sat on her stool outside of the Queen's door hoping to hear the bell ring. Now that she was the Queen's night maid and no longer her body servant Sarah's life was one boring torturous evening after another. Sitting. Waiting. Sitting. Waiting. Sitting. And you guessed it, waiting. The escapades that she had once enjoyed were no longer an option. Now she was either helping the nuns during the daylight hours that she was awake or sitting here during the night, helping no one at all.
In her mind, she reconstructed a conversation she had with a nun that morning. In the edited version Sarah had thought of her retort in a timely manner and it was the nun who left the dining hall frowning and not her.
Their conversation had been about her living arrangements. Sarah wanted to move to a single room instead of having to share her modest accommodations with Sister Yancy. Sister Yancy snored like a demon but that wasn't the real reason she wanted a single room. The real reason had much more to do with having some personal space. It also had a little to do with The Kings Shield, Pallum Hitchen. She didn't love him. Sarah was unsure if love was something she could actually feel. Her life had been tumultuous, to say the least, but what she felt for Hitchen had been closer to love than anything she'd had before. Probably.
He was lost to her now but Sarah was sure she could win him back. If he would talk to her. If he would look at her. If he would treat her as if she were something other than an inanimate object in rooms that he passed through from time to time. If those nuns ever relented and gave her a room of her own. Did she love him or was she just without anything else to do? A question she asked herself a dozen times a day.
With the bore that her life had become, remembering fun was about all she had left. Reminiscing and obsessing were vastly different things but when one had nothing to do other than reminisce, it seemed obsession was the logical endpoint.
She had been trying to not "reminisce" about Pallum but it was a difficult task as he had been in around the queen's wing of the palace much more lately. Even stomping around just this evening. He had not been by to see Sarah though, he had brushed past her without acknowledgment walking to the princess's door.
"Do not disturb us. No matter what," He had said to Sarah when he reached Theodora's door. He didn't even face her when he spoke. Without so much as a knock Pallum opened her door and stepped in, closing it behind him.
The audacity of some men. When you were The King's Shield though, Sarah supposed audacity like that did not even require consideration.
For the first fifteen minutes, Sarah thought it might have been about the riots at the harbor. Late in the evening, she'd overheard Prince Kavish talking with the Queen and King about. When their conversation ended he'd left with a host of palace guards to put an end to it. Had something happened?
As the minutes eeked into an hour the maid doubted that was the point of Pallum's visit. Now that he'd had been in there for hours it most assuredly was not. Either he was dead, singing her lullabies or they were engaged in activities that were quite unbecoming a princess and her protector.
Sarah was snapped out of her musing when she thought she heard movement in the Queen's chambers. Maybe the bell was broken? She got up and eased the door open, peeking her head in. The Queen asleep alone in her bed exactly as she had been every evening for the last six months. The King kept his own quarters, he and his queen had not slept in the same room for years. He snored something awful and it was said he suffered from night terrors.
Sarah stared at the sleeping figure, hoping to gain some insight or maybe to will some forgiveness into her. The Queen had not once asked for as much as a glass of water. Sarah knew she was being punished and froze out. The loss of the friendship had been hard. She closed the door and sought solace with her stool.
She and the Queen had been rather close. Sarah had got one extremely well with the Queen, she'd always had a knack for understanding people and finding something to like about them. The maid had earned the queen's trust and favor, becoming her body servant for a time. That all changed in the spring.
Most people, the Queen included, thought Sarah had slept with the King. In reality, the King had caught her sleeping with Pallum and he was jealous. He had been after Sarah for months and she had resisted. Sure he was handsome in his own way. Absolutely he was a great flirt and fun to chat with. But in the end, Sarah knew sleeping with the King and ruining her relationship with the Queen would have her tossed from the Palace faster than a baby from a brothel.
What had really happened was the King caught her in the throes of passion. With Pallum.
And what passion it was.
He knew what she wanted even as the need was still unformed in her mind. If she thought the feeling of his steel grip on his wrists to be desirable, in less than an hour she would be feeling his hard calloused hands too tight on her wrist. But just tight enough.
When she thought of his soft kisses on her cheek he seemed to appear from thin air, strong arms wrapped about her waist, stubbled beard on her neck, warm breath on her ear, and those kisses on her cheek.
Her stomach clenched at the thought. She grew warm all over. The heat between her legs was the warmest. With unthought action, her pelvis pushed forward, searching. Still searching for something, she slid farther forward on her stool. Clenching her ass, planting the balls of her feet she pulled herself towards an imagined pleasure. Her right hand was gripping her dress as she pushed into her thigh at the same time. Her hand drifted farther. Her skirts moved just so and she shuddered.
Her eyes closed without being told to do so, her tongue pushed against her teeth and she breathed lightly, short gasps in through her mouth. With one extended exhalation, she breathed out through her nose. She allowed her tongue to lick her lips.
The maid forced her eyes open and moved her hand to her face. Sarah's hand came away from her forehead moist. In the chilly chambers, she had started sweating.
Being found in this condition while being punished for rumors of fornicating would be a disaster. She may as well have fucked the King on his throne while the Queen looked on.
She pushed out her breath. Sarah forced an ugly sound, deliberately trying to make herself feel unattractive and change her mood.
Of the lovers she had taken, Pallum was rivaled by none. It seemed an instinct of his for when he would take charge. In an instant, she would submit to him. She trusted him completely. When he bound her wrists and her feet together on an ambassador's bed during a midweek lunch, she was deathly afraid of being caught but trusting him then melted her.
Should he command her to climb atop him in his office, she would. Regrettably, he had, and even more so, she obeyed. It seemed daring yet safe. No man was stupid enough or powerful enough to walk into Pallum Hitchens office without at the very least knocking and waiting to be called in. Aside from the one man in the Kingdom with more audacity and power than Pallum himself.
The memory of the shame she felt had her desires easing up but they were not gone.
"Be good. Do good." It was the last thing that her mother had said to her and she had tried to live by it.
She felt aimless in life now. She had done everything she should have. She had been a friend of the princess, a friend of the queen, she had given herself to a righteous man that promised her the world. No matter what her choice, Sarah felt that she would always be left holding the hot end of the poker. Was this her lot in life? It had been so far, why would it not continue to be?
She was a commoner. A maid. A servant. A slave in all but name.
Sarah forced those feelings down and tried to think of the good things in her life.
She wasn't cleaning latrines.
She had a small amount of time to herself.
She'd had something like love. It had been so good. Sarah had felt so close to being free.
Her thoughts spiraled out of her control and became stuck in orbit around the memories of Pallum.
She was jealous. The Princess was a magnificent-looking woman. It was not surprising that Pallum would take an interest in her. It was surprising that he was being so bold and open. This information could be very valuable to Sarah if she played things just right.
Pallum had ignored Sarah since the incident but he had taken on no other lovers that she'd heard about. Was it the mystery surrounding the princess that would drive Pallum to be so reckless?
When the princess had left for Nalado she had been a plain girl. Over the years while she had been away the plain girl had grown into a stunning woman. Dark eyes and dark hair. Her shoulders were wide and her waist was narrow. Her hips and backside however were too narrow, having children could be very dangerous to her. That could be the reason that she was still unwed. Or she could just be a difficult bitch. In her current mood, Sarah relished imagining her as a boring person and a bad lover.
Sarah had been brought in as a playmate for Theodora when the princess was a child. It was a favor to her family. Her father had been a boyhood friend of the king but had died disgraced. The royals took pity on her mother and brought Sarah in as a servant.
The difference in age between the two young women was significant. More than six years. The difference in life experience was even greater. The similarities between a thirteen-year-old commoner with almost zero agency and a seven-year-old princess could be found only in their gender.
As a young girl, the Princess had been intelligent and thoughtful. Young Theodora was charming when she wanted to be and cold when she didn't. She observed the world rather than experiencing it. When she met new people they seemed to confuse her and amaze her and finally, always bore and annoy her within days.
No matter what her mood or temperament, Sarah had always been patient and obedient and the two got on well. Despite the age gap, Sarah had been the closest thing to a friend that the princess had as a child.
Now it had been more than 12 years since she had seen the Princess. Sarah admired the changes in young Theodora. The country that she had been a hostage in treated her well. The fair skin she'd been gifted by her mother and father had been darkened by the sun. She was exotic, and foreign, but also of this land. She seemed unflappable and so sure of herself. In command of whatever room she happened to be standing in. Sarah wanted to feel the way she imagined that Theodora felt.
Of course, that made her more desirable than any woman in the Kingdom. Of course, Pallum was now in her room. Of course, Pallum had been in her room all night.
She considered getting up and walking out of the palace. Be good, do good did not mean that she had to be whoever these people wanted and do whatever they wanted. She could find herself a new life. Why let herself be subject to these people? Sarah then considered what she knew of the world outside of these walls. It was not an easy world, it was not a kind world, and truth be told it was not a world she wanted any part of. Best to make best of what she had.
For hours Sarah sat on her stool trying to keep her thoughts away from what was happening behind that door.
Eventually, her will failed her. Sarah kicked off her slippers and stood barefoot on the cool stones. Tiptoeing to the princess's door Sarah leaned in placing her ear against it.
She heard light groans. That bastard.
Sarah kneeled down by the keyhole hoping to take a peek. The locking mechanism for the door was much better than those that she was used to in the servant's areas. There was nothing to see.
She heard moaning and grunting even standing six inches away from the door. Furious and jealous and excited all at the same time Sarah turned away from the door and stalked towards her stool to take her seat.
Halfway there she changed her mind and turned around feet slapping quietly against the stones as she approached Theodora's bedroom. Sarah strengthened herself, inhaling deep. She reached for the door handle hovering just off of it.
The door handle twisted under her hand, but not under her power. She jerked her hand away as the door swung inward.
Blocking the view into the room was Pallum Hitchen. He was even bigger than she remembered. He stood naked, blood smeared all over his body. It looked like someone had tried to paint him a very deep red from his mouth area all the way down to his toes. He smelled heavily of iron but also of the princess. What had he done?
His dark eyes stared drilled into hers.
Sarah could think of no words to say. Her mouth fell open. Sorry. She should say sorry. She started to form the word with her mouth.
Before she could make a sound, Pallum's hand shot out and he squeezed her throat even as his fingers were still finding their grip. No holding back, no mercy, just crushing strength. Sarah felt a crunch in her throat and the world flickered.
"I can't breathe. Please. Please let me go." Sarah tried to scream.
With no wind with which to make words, her teeth clacking together was all that her attempt at a plea produced.
She pried at his fingers until her strength to do so slowly ebbed. Her arms fell to her sides. The world closed in on her, the room shrank. The world faded.
A flicker of hesitation crossed his face. His hand loosened.
She wheezed in a short gasp of air. Then another. The room came back to her. The darkness in her vision receded.
With a renewed strength she scratched at him wildly. She battered his arm and gnashed her teeth. She tried to kick him but with just one arm he lifted her from the floor. Sarah's legs flailed catching nothing, not even the ground.
His free hand balled into a fist and he cocked it back.
Please. No. The words over and over again ran through her mind.
He seemed uncertain. His arm sagged.
Pallum did not meet her gaze, staring instead beyond her.
The Kings Shield elevated his arm, pulled it back, and hit her. The world rocked.
The right side of the room was now gone to darkness. The fist came again and Sarah slipped from consciousness.