While Athena is stuck in her own world recalling Carson's journey to Law School and how she bonded with June, the rain starts pouring down a bit faster. She is holding hands with Carson still and they round the corner to her house before lightning starts to strike. The front door to her house is forcefully pushed open and the couple laughs.
Athena's curls bounce up and down as she removes her coat. Carson's green eyes catch the light gleaming from the ceiling by the door; each individual savors the moment of bliss. Waffle and Syrup are sleeping on the couch: both cats are curled up in a ball, tails resting by their faces. Carson breaks out into conversation to get a pulse check on his fiance.
"What is going through your mind? Your mood seems to have shifted since we left campus." Athena has her back turned to Carson while hanging up her coat. She slowly turns around and gives him a smile while answering his question.
"Right now, my mood reflects the weather outside, gloomy and sad." Her eyes begin to close and few tears crawl down her face. The gravity of Leukemia, how invasive chemotherapy will be, and the burden Carson and the rest of the family will carry hits Athena like a punch to the gut. It hurts her to think about her predicament and the implications it has regarding her family.
Carson stretches out his arms inviting Athena in for a hug. Her face molds into a frown and her tears stream down harder as she walks into her lover's arms. Carson's strength makes Athena feel safe: she wipes her eyes dry as Carson's embrace holds her like a blanket. He does not mind Athena's tears being dried on his shirt since the rain left the shirt damp and dirty.
Ten minutes pass and Athena calms down. She is no longer crying, but, the sadness still lingers in her body. Carson slowly lets go of her and he walks her to the couch. Much to their dismay, Waffle and Syrup are shooed away from the sofa by Carson. Waffle hisses in protest and Syrup glares and Carson. He laughs at both cats and sits down next to Athena.
At this point, Athena's eyes are slightly red and her face is flushed a light pink. Her eyes are staring at the floor, nose dripping a little bit, and head feeling light. Crying for prolonged periods of time can leave a person feeling light-headed and mentally absent. Carson gently rubs Athena's back in an effort to soothe her soul. The gesture works and Athena pulls her feet onto the couch: tucking them gracefully to her right-hand side. She places her head on Carson's lap, using it as a personal pillow.
Syrup comes back to the sofa and curls up next to Athena: a loud 'purring' sound leaves the cat's mouth signaling to Athena she has a second set of ears to listen to her. Carson lets out a calming breath before asking Athena to do him a favor. "When you are comfortable, I would appreciate you sharing why and how your mood reflects the rain pouring down outside."
Athena takes a deep breath in and out catching herself before the waterworks start up again. "During our walk from Seattle University, I recalled meeting your sister for the first time and how I helped you navigate the waters of Law School admissions. It dawned on me how happy, and sometimes frustrating, I felt while forming those memories...". Athena rubs her nose with the back of her right hand, letting out an audible sniffle. She continues with her answer.
"It also dawned on me how serious Leukemia is and it makes me upset how much of a burden I am going to be in the months to come. I dislike inconveniencing people and fully aware of how stubborn I can be when others offer me assistance." In her mind, Athena has created a list of ways her family members are going to try and help her: checking in on her mental state, offering to buy food when she is too tired to make a grocery store run, surprising her with homemade pastries, and chauffeuring her to and from appointments. Not to mention spending money on flights to and from California if her health and needs become too much for Carson, Luis, and Hector to handle by themselves.
The discomfort on Athena's face encourages Carson to smile at the wall in front of him. He is absorbing what Athena has shared and remaining mentally present for her. More often than not, Carson searches for a response to Athena's words when they are in conversation together. At this moment, Carson keeps his mind open and free from clutter.
Athena starts playing with loose thread dangling from Carson's black sweat pants. He lets out a tiny giggle and starts smiling while continuing to rub her back. Once it is clear Athena is done sharing her feelings, Carson weighs in on her response.
"I am not going to sugar the seriousness of Leukemia or chemotherapy. However, I feel there is no need to be hard on yourself At. Sure, taking you to and from appointments will feel like a drag at times, and it may be difficult to get you to eat. But, I would appreciate you asking for help and not feeling guilty about doing so when necessary.
When I visited the rents last week, Luis and I had a lengthy conversation regarding mental health and showing support. Please let me finish my thought." Athena looks at Carson with puppy dog eyes and tries to say something. This is why Carson asks her to let him finish his thought. Carson continues with his story.
"Luis mentioned it was not easy for Hector to ask for help, nor was it easy for Luis to figure out how to help Hector. The two of them agreed to have open communication with each other. At times their emotions would run high and they fought, but, they learned how to pick up cues from each other and establish boundaries. Setting boundaries made it easier for both parents to support the other."Athena has closed her eyes and is thinking over what Carson is sharing. She is good at staying present and not letting her mind wander during a conversation.