"Did you want to watch the movie we're watching?" He asked. Still making small talk which is more often than not, a bother.
"Not really, I just came because she wanted to."
"Is this the first time you go out with her?"
"Yea it is."
"Are you nervous?"
"Only a bit."
They kept making small talk while they waited for the worker to attend them so they can buy the tickets, which bored Miles. Little by little his questions and replies started fading away. The person who was talking to him seemed like nothing more than a shadow talking distortedly.
It was as if there was a dense cloud in between the two. He could sort of see him but not clearly. Even after buying the tickets and going back to the other pair who was happily laughing and talking, the cloud started surrounding Miles. Started to separate him from the rest of the group. He couldn't hear them anymore, nor did he try to at all. Only speaking when they asked him a question.
The rest even started talking between the three, he felt as though he was going out alone, just with a group of people.
The time came for the movie to start. They all sat down, Miles being sandwiched between Jessica and David. Eating the popcorn before the movie even started as all people do.
But in the darkness of the theatre, and between the light from the screen, Miles still remained in the clouds surrounding him, he was still sitting between silhouettes. David and Kate talked all throughout the movie. Jessica would whisper to them too, so Miles was between all the laughter while he had to think
-why am I like this?-
He hid himself for no reason truly.
David never wronged him.
Kate was just a friend of his girlfriend.
Jessica was the best thing to happen to him.
Yet, there he was, sitting alone in the crowd, hearing all the muffled noises around him. All the chatter, talking, laughing, giggling. He was somehow separated from it.
He suddenly got up.
"Where you going?" Asked Jessica.
"Restroom." He said blankly.
-I'm running away again.- he thought to himself.
He always did this. It was second nature to leave when he was uncomfortable. When he was in trouble. When he was sad. Anytime he was in a bad position he would simply flee the scene in a heartbeat. This time it was no different. He felt left out even though he left himself out. Still he hurried out and made it to the restroom, where, he didn't even dare look in the mirror. It would be far too embarrassing to look at his face at the moment. He was afraid of seeing himself for what he really is , a coward, so he just stayed in the restroom for what seemed to be an eternity.
-Should I leave right now? It was supposed to be just us two after all. That's what she implied.- he believed this justified his mood and why he should be allowed to leave.
-Not like me leaving will make ay difference…-
With this final thought he made way to leave the restroom and leave home, defeated.
As soon as he opened the door
"Hey…"
-?!-
Right outside the restroom was not the heroine, it was Kate.
Standing, leaning on the wall, playing with her feet and twirling her fingers in her curly hair. As if she were waiting for him.
"Hey." He replied. There was a pause, then she just looked at him and said
"You were about to leave weren't you?"
-How'd she know…?!-
"Uhmm no I wasn't."
"I know you were." she replied in a split second.
"But why were you leaving? Are you not feeling okay?"
"…no it's not that."
"Miles, I know you feel awkward with David being here, but we're all trying to be your friends. We all just want to help you out. Jessica simply thought bringing him would make you feel at ease."
"…" he stayed quite.
She explained things as if she knew what he was going to ask. Like a mind reader answering people's questions before they even say them.
She got up closer, nearer, she didn't shake his heart the way Jessica does but she startled him. Because even after reading his thoughts in a second, she looked as if she knew nothing, she seemed innocent and all-knowing at the same time. Making his eyes stay fixated on her.
"Don't leave." she said gently.
"But I feel so out of place. It's not like I'm even talking. Nor is anyone talking to me either. I-I wasn't prepared for this type of thi-"
"What type of thing?" she interrupted.
"Nothing is going on, it's just a group of friends going out, nothing else, it ain't such a big deal."
"But-"
"No. Listen to me, you are going to stay here with us, it doesn't matter if you aren't used to it, you will get used to it. If you try to leave I won't let you."
"…" he stayed quite but reading his face she can tell he was about to walk away.
"No, I'm not letting you."
"——?! Hey what are you-?"
"I said I said I wouldn't let you."
She took his hand by forced and walked him back. Anytime he tried to pull his hand back she gripped stronger, she didn't even turn to look at him she just kept marching forwards. After a couples tries he gave in. She did something no one has ever done for him, he felt her warmth and care, and thought to himself
-Somebody went out of their way to spend time with me.-
They returned to the movie as if nothing had ever happened. Without the misty clouds separating him and everyone else.
He did see though.
He saw how David and Jessica were bonding when he came back. Going up the stairs he saw how she laughed. How she smiled with him. Different than with the other guys even. Different than when she's with him. One moment, in the darkness of the theatre, with the constant flashing of the movie. She laughed, she leaned on him. Her hand, slithered from his shoulder to his chest carelessly yet carefully and gently. The touches Miles found to be specially for him were rubbing off on another without a care in the world.
-maybe I'm overreacting. Maybe it isn't such a big deal. She's just laughing. It's my fault. It's because I'm not a funny guy, never been. Yea, that must be why. She's just laughing don't think about it. Just delete it from your memory. Just ignore it. It's my fault. It's because I'm not a funny guy. Never been….- train of thought ran in circles.
His head slowly turned back down, a veil of shadows covered his face now.
His grip grew weak as he saw the scene. But his mind was made up, he would just lay low and stay with them. If he put his head down he could still talk to them, without having to see anything hurtful. Even though there was something piercing and twisting his stomach from the inside, making him crunch over, he would simply ignore it and sit between the noise.
His hand slowly, let go of Kate's. Because he didn't need to hold on to it, he decided to stay on his own now. He would stay, as a empty husk but stay.
But she quickly grabbed it, again.
That was the bit of light, the thin fragile ray of light piercing through his veil of shadows.
"I'm not letting you leave."
Her smile shone brightly in the theatre. It was able to draw a miniature sincere smile from him.
She let go once they got to their aisle. Once it was too late for him to escape.
"Hey you guys are back!" Said Jessica.
"Shhhhh!" Was heard from someone in the front row.
"Hey you guys are back…" she whispered laughing.
"Yea we are, sorry for the wait." Said Miles.
The order of sitting had changed now. It was from left to right: Kate, Miles, Jessica, and David.
But now Miles was actually talking, slowly he integrated himself into the conversations. Sometimes getting startled by people's shushing, but he talked nonetheless. At some point Jessica held his hand, making him feel more at ease, but he felt even more at ease knowing Kate was next to him, and wouldn't let him run away.
The rest of the day went as well as it could go. All going home after talking about the movie, ironic because they didn't really watch it.
The sun was beginning to set while he walked Jessica home. What a feeling it was, it felt unreal to him. As if they were at the edge of the world. But they stopped a couple houses before her home.
"What's going on?"
"Well my dad is home, I don't want him to see you so I'll go on my own from here."
-well, I can't argue with her on this.- he thought.
He looked down for a second, and she appeared from below him again, her hand slithering onto his cheek and giving him a quick and eternal peck.
As soon as she did she skipped back home. But the image of her turning back and smiling, with the few orange rays from the sun hitting her face. Oh it was engraved in his mind, in the drawer of happy memories.