"Happy birthday tooooo youuuu~~!"
"Yaaaayyyy!!!" "Wooo-hoooo!"
Blowing out my candle, I officially turned 1. Considering we are in Korea, we are quite weird. Yes, I did turn 1 in January 1 but we still celebrate the day we were born; birthdays.
Going back to my room after playing some games and being passed around the table for Sun-hee and my grandparents to play with, I lie there; waiting to fall asleep.
[BONK DEEP DOOP ZHZHZHZH..... Update commencing!]
'...do you have to yell the sound effects?'
[they don't work without the sound effects, you dummy!]
[toot.....tooot.....tooooottt...ting! Update successful! New feature, 'Quest' successfully unlocked!]
'Quest'
————————— → HARDEST TO EASEST →
Win the Olympics (1/???) ┃ Impossible ┃
Reward: ₲1,750,000 ┃ALL STATS +20 ┃ Kicking Power x10% ┃Pull & Push x10%
Win 2nd in the Olympics (1/???) ┃ Impossible ┃
Reward: ₲1,500,000┃ ALL STATS +10 ┃Kicking Power x5% ┃ Pull & Push x5%
Win 3rd in the Olympics (1/???) ┃ Impossible ┃
Reward: ₲1,000,000 ┃ ALL STATS +5 ┃Kicking Power x2.5% ┃ Pull & Push x2.5%
...
...
...
Energize Dad (1/10) ┃Normal ┃
Reward: ₲200 ┃ Charm x1%
...
...
Play with Jung (1/10) ┃Cakewalk ┃
Reward: ₲10 ┃Happiness x5% (T)
Make Mom happy (1/5) ┃Cakewalk┃
Reward: ₲10 ┃Happiness x5% (T)
—————————
'So... I'm assuming the numbers in parenthesis is the challenge I'm on and how many times I can complete them?'
[Wow! For once, you actually use that empty skull of yours to think! Yes, that's right!]
So what's the "T" by some quests?'
[I'm not a drama channel, dingus!]
'....'
[.....it stands for temporary! For example, if it's beside a 'Happiness' increase, you will be happy temporarily]
'Ahhh... got it. By the way, why are the items so expensive compared to the rewards from quests?'
[why? Are you asking why we price items the way we do!?! First of all, that's none of your business! And second of all, if we made it so you can buy the Bionic set with winning one Olympic, what is the point of training for the next one?]
'Hmmm... isn't getting there a bit hard?'
[wow...this is the stupidest thing I've ever heard... ever. And I have been a system for over 100,000 years. Are the Olympics hard? You know, this may be my first time on this planet but are you asking me if the Olympics, the top form of competition on your planet... IS HARD?!?!]
'Okay ok-'
[NO! NOT OKAY! Are you brain dead?! God! Of course it's hard you ******* piece of ****! What is the point of having the Olympics if it ain't hard!? I'm sorry! I am cr- yelling since you sound so stupid! In fact, I'm sorry for your stupidity!]
'...hic... t-that's cool...'
Remembering about the system's Bipolar Disorder, I ignore it and chalk it up to being from that...right? However...
'my baby brain just got yelled at and I'm about to cry... damn it...moooommmm!!'
"WAAAHHHHHHH! WEEEHHHHH! MAMA! MAMA!"
"Ara ara... my little baby needs a bedtime story?"
Even though I'm 1, my mother still reads me bedtime stories and I need her to stay here until I sleep.
'Remembering it now, I think I was a total momma's boy. Wait... was I? Whatever, I'm here, she's here; it doesn't matter what happened in my past life. I'm going to fix it anyways'
"Mama's gonna buy you a jumping jack~
And if that jumping jack is broke~~
Mama's gonna buy you a velvet cloak~~
if that velvet cloak goes coarse~~..."
'Ahhhh...I'm already tired...'
Waking up the next day, I see something unusual...
[dink ding ding!!! Quest completed!]
—————————
Make Mom happy (2/5) ┃ Cakewalk ┃
Reward: ₲10 ┃Happiness x5%
₲10 have been deposited into your shop account! Enjoy, your ₲10, you failure!
—————————
'When.....no, considering my mother's personality, I probably was a good son in her dreams or something like that... yeah, that's the most likely situation'
Getting up, I see I didn't pee myself. Despite my brain knowing not to pee, my bladder doesn't listen and well... it happens. Embarrassing, sure but I guess it's fine since I'm a child.
:Alright! Time to play with Jung'
Going out of my room with my small and stumpy legs, I make it over to the living room and see Jung playing cars by himself; refraining from asking me to play crashing cars for about 8 months.
I'm sure in a few more months he'll be completely clean; no need to attend Crashing Cars Anonymous.
"Jung-hyungnim!"
"Oh! Little one! You are awake; let's play cars!"
"Un!"
Crashing cars for 30 minutes, mother called us to the table then father drives Jung to preschool. From what I've heard from Jung and mom, he is really popular. Sorry, Jung.
Can't wait to reach high school and.... mwahahaha! Ahem ahem... anyways... sitting my mother's lap while she works, I was allowed into their workspace since I was a good boy and rarely cried or distracted people.
'Every damn morning, noon and afternoon; people pet me. Pet me! I'm a human! Not a damn dog!! AAARGHHH! Stupid baby brain! Why do I enjoy this!!! GRAAHHHHH!!!'
"hic...hic...UBUBUBU!"
Seeing that I cried after she pet my head, she recoils then apologizes to my mom. Obviously, sorrys don't fix her baby crying so she sends her off with a demon-like glare; a lion looking at a dying deer or a hunter spotting a tired fox.
Seeing to it that the co-worker runs off with shaky legs, mother continues work until times up. Putting me in the back seat, she plays various nursery rhymes in Korean and sometimes English.
Ohohoh! Don't worry mother! I learnt this for my black company job! Why do you think 6 million a month was possible after only 5 years? Hard work? I'm already forced to do that! It's through language learning...which is....hard work...
don't mind that.
Remembering to check my quest, the system reminds me why I played with Jung this morning.
'Hmmm... this probably means that notifications will only pop up in my brain when I think of the system or anything related... quest'
[ding ding ding!!! Quest completed!]
—————————
Play with Jung (2/5) ┃ Cakewalk ┃
Reward: ₲10 ┃Happiness x5%
₲10 have been deposited into your shop account! Enjoy, your ₲10, you loser!
—————————
'Sweet! Hey, Feelie. Can I exchange ₲1 for real life money'
[finally! A sensible question hidden in the absolute stupidity that is your brain! Yes! You can but that unlocks at age 15! Currently, ₲1 is 500 won or, $0.50!]
'Thanks.... I guess'
Following my regular routine of eating dinner with the family, listening to English stories with mom and falling asleep to her songs, I check my status.
'Status'
—————————
Name: Kim Min-chul
Age: 0.9
Titles: None! Wow! You suck!
HP: 3/3
STR: 0.2 RES: 0.1
SPD: 0.9 STAMI: 0.9
INT: 14
—————————
'Ahhhhh..... let's grow up quickly'
—————————
(A.N) alright readers! I plan on republishing this story a bit later but I will still be updating the chapters ever single day. Same thing with my other novel... yeah!
Anyways, hope you enjoyed, peace ✌️!