*Mackenzie pov
My phone rings and wakes me from a snooze on the sofa. I haven't slept well in days and I'm exhausted. A combination of missing Yoongi and the frequent visits to the bathroom to either pee or throw up to blame. I open my eyes and see the display. 'Future husband' is blazoned across the screen.
I gasp, feel my tummy flip and grin like an idiot!
"Hey!! How are you doing?" I ask with a smile in my voice
"I miss you! I love you! I want you home with me!" he blurts rapidly
I giggle. I experience utter relief and feel my entire body relax, almost as if someone loosened a tight band encircling my body. My breaths come easier and are deeper, my brain has slipped from 'system maintenance' mode into 'overdrive'. I can feel a tear tracking its way down the side of my nose, making its way toward my mouth. I can feel! I realise that I cant recall a single physical sensation since the day he left to go home until now! He makes me feel! I'm numb without him!
"I love and miss you too Yoongi! So much! I'm booking a flight and coming home in only a few more days. I have nearly finished everything I need to here. I need you to be patient for a little longer. I am closing up my life in England so I have nothing to distract me from my new life with you. When I get back to you I am never leaving again" I explain
I can hear the tears in his voice as he replies, his words punctuated by small sobs, sniffs and gulps for air.
"I'm sssss-so sssss-sorry Ken..... Zie! I, I........ I don't know......."
The sobbing overwhelms him and steals his power of speech. My heart is breaking! The anguish in the sound is clear. I make soothing noises, whispering gentle words as I did when my babies cried, promising him I will make him happy forever if that's what he wants. I have never felt the need to hug someone so badly before. He needs me there as much as I want to be there. I'm going back to Korea!
"Yoongi, sweetheart!? Calm down. Remember your mindfulness? Take deep breaths, slowly. Good. Ok, now count your breath in 1,2,3,4,5..... and out....... 1,2,3,4,5. Now, where are you?"
I spend the next 20 minutes coaching him through his panic attack, using our well practised mindfulness techniques. They always work, but sometimes you need a little nudge from outside to realise you need to focus on your own feelings for a short while. I am a mindfulness master now after the last 15 years of my life!
"Yoongi. Let's not talk about any of the hard and heavy topics on the phone. I want to organise the big stuff in person. I want to hug and reassure you while we talk. I'm flying home as soon as I can get a flight"
Gentle laughter.....
"Are you laughing? Why are you laughing?" I chuckle
"You just described my man parts" he responds with another little laugh
"What? When did I?" I question confusedly
"You said 'hard and heavy'. That is how I feel right now"
"Aaaah! Got it! Wow, so nice to know that I can affect you so, especially while I'm pouring my heart out" I tease, but actually loving the fact.
I feel a spark of desire ignite within me. I want him here with me right now, I want to feel his body beneath my lips and my fingers, and I want to have his hands and lips on me. I want to feel him tracing his tongue from my neck to my toes, his beautiful long fingers lightly grazing my skin, his teeth nibbling my ear, my neck, my boobs, downward.
I picture myself laying in the crook of his arm, my head on his chest, my fingers dancing across his tight, firm abdomen, moving down and taking him into my hand!
I hear a groan from the other end of the phone and wonder if he is having similar thought to me. I ask him
"Yoongi. Are you feeling as horny as me right now?"
"Holy shit!! You don't know how much I want you here right now!" he replies, sucking air through his teeth.
"I will be there so soon, I promise you, but in the mean time....."
I describe in detail the thoughts I'm having about him, what I like doing to him, what I love him doing to me. I tell him how he tastes, how much I love how he makes me feel. How much I love him!
I can't help but touch myself. Just hearing his heavy breathing and groans, and knowing he is pleasuring himself too turning me on so much I soon feel the waves of orgasm taking over my body.
I hear Yoongis breathing rate speed up and become shallower, then silence, followed by a deep moan of relief and contentment. I fall back on the sofa and smile. Who says phone sex isn't hot!?
"Babe? You ok?" I ask after a minute or two of silence, wondering if our call has actually been disconnected.
"Please come home soon. I need you with me" he says, a hint of sadness in his tone