"Yoongi isn't your son!!"
Jay shakes his head. I am floored by this revelation, my brain pulsing with all the thoughts and questions being formulated.
"Does he know?!" I ask, the shock I am feeling making my voice waver, my stomach turn over.
"I have never formally told him, but I'm sure he suspects. We have never been close. When he was small I was away from home more than I was there due to my work. My wife and I were married in name only at this point, and as he was not biologically my son I found it hard to bond with him. Our meetings were so infrequent. We really had no time to build a relationship, and my wife was always so possessive of him. They meant the world to each other alone, to the exclusion of all others. I resented him. I was jealous. The pursuit of a child, the pursuit of him, was what first tore us apart. His arrival killed any hope I had that we may resolve our issues and be happy again. I began to stay away from home as much as possible, only going home for holidays. As he grew their bond only increased, but he and I were very distant, our relationship very formal and stilted. I think he probably grew to dislike the holidays as much as me. I could never wait to get back to work, spending as much time in my home study as I could while I was there, and on more than one occasion I invented a crisis or conflict to allow me to leave early.
We do not look alike, we share no common interests, we do not work in the same field and he ruined my life. He also chooses to embarrass me with his so called music career. Despite having had classical piano tuition, achieving success in many competitions and being offered a position with the KBS symphony orchestra he preferred to join a pop group and pursue rap music"
Jay wrinkles his nose and snorts his disgust. I can't believe what I'm hearing. A little boy, overprotected and sheltered by one parent, totally neglected and despised by the other. How sad and confusing for him. He would have been better off if they had fully separated or divorced, but the preservation of the facade of their perfect life was too important to them both.
As Shay and Bo got older we discussed whether they would ever like to meet their father, or any siblings they may have. Neither had ever had any desire to meet their father, which made me happy, although I would assist them if they ever did change their minds. I never spoke badly of Jay, infact, I never spoke of Jay at all. Both kids had asked me questions about him once or twice when they were younger, and I always resolved to tell them the truth about him, but to not poison them against him.
Shay once asked me if his Daddy was a Tiger? I assured him that he was not. Bo wondered if he had 'stick on hair' like LEGO figures?! That was the totality of their interest in their Father.
They did however both express an interest in meeting any siblings they might have.
They now thought they had found a brother. They had not.
Jay continues to speak.
"You see why I was so surprised when you became pregnant!? My wife became pregnant after only 2 months of sex with another man. She and I had tried for children for 13 years without success. I didn't believe I could father children Mackenzie."
"As illuminating as all this has been Jay, I'm still at a loss as to why you are here? What does any of this have to do with me?"
"I have decided that I want a relationship with my actual biological children. I plan to have one, and I will do whatever it takes to convince you to allow that" he tells me, lazily spinning the gun on the table to emphasise the meaning of his words.
"After all these years you just decide that's what you want, forget what anyone else might want? Over my dead body Jay!"
"As you wish Mackenzie.... as you wish"