When I woke up in the morning, I felt unordinary cold. At first I thought, it must have been the side-effects of almost freezing outside, but now I'm pretty sure it must have been the icy glare the heir to the throne was shooting at me from the chair in my room.
I almost blushed, looking at him, remembering my dreams. I can't believe my imagination got us in bed together and just to sleep at that, so boring.
"Where's the crown?" He asked demandingly, making my foggy memory of the previous night.
At the memory of the king's bared behind, I couldn't help the grin spread across my face. "Did you like it?" I asked him, reaching to my wrist to transform the bracelet in its original form. "I thought it was hilarious, besides is there a better way to embarrass a sexual predator that is the king."
I handed him the crown, waiting for his response. When it didn't come, I just kept on talking. "Now I know that my next question may be a bit uncomfortable for you, but I just gotta know." I searched his eyes, but they were focused on examining the crown. "He's small, isn't he?"
At that he raised his eyes to meet my curious glance. "Whatever do you mean?" he asked, genuinely confused.
"His…um, package…is small, right?" I asked, slightly embarrassed.
"What package?" He asked his voice getting more and more irritated.
How on earth is he not getting what I'm asking? I guess I'll have to be blunt with this one.
"His penis. It's small." I stated, but made is sound like a question. Pure shock crept on his face and a small blush appeared there, too.
Oh, I am making the ice sculpture blush! How exciting.
"I mean, he must be." I continued, while he tried to compose himself and probably think of the easiest (or maybe the cruellest) way to kill me. "No one that hateful is packing. I'm sure boys in school made fun of him or something to make him like that. And don't even get me started on how he treats women. One must've degrade him considerably, destroying his fragile masculinity." With certain words of my speech, I send the cold prince a pointed look, showing him my opinion about him, too.
"I am displeased to inform you," he said, his jaw clenched, "that I have not looked at my father's private parts. Therefore, I cannot neither confirm nor deny your accusations."
"But if you had to guess, estimate even, from some other um…factors. What would you say." I teased, enjoying seeing him flushed and anxious.
"Then, I would have to say that his opinion of women is not a consequence of the size of his manhood nor the result of him being treated poorly by a woman." He said, trying desperately to come off as cool and unaffected as usually. "Maybe the reason he treats women the way he does are the women themselves." With that, it was me who was a receiver of a pointed look.
"Interesting you would say that. Tell me dear prince, have you yourself ever been mistreated by a woman." I grinned at him, letting him know that I realize how I affect him. "Or by a man, at that."
"I have never been with a woman before and I see you already know about my little entanglement with Evren." He said, stiffening more with every letter that left his mouth. How is he not in a painful cramp, yet?
"Yes, I thought it was very sweet." I admitted, no teasing or sarcasm.
"Well, we were thirteen at the time and didn't know better." He squeezed out, trying to dismiss the whole thing.
"Only thirteen?" I said, my eyes widening. "That is a young age to find a lover."
"Um, well yes." He flushed again, his eyes looking for escape. "Although, we were never together in that way."
Ok, that makes sense. "So who was it that hurt you?"
"Nobody really got a chance." I said, his teeth pressing together violently.
At first, I looked at him in confusion and then it dawned on me. "Oh, my god. You're a virgin?"
He looked uncomfortably around the room for about fifth time and I saw a deeper blush decorating his handsome face. "I know someone like you-"
"A worthless whore." I interrupted.
"-might find that strange, but I simply hadn't had time for such unnecessary and irrational urges." He finished coldly.
"Of course." I nodded and smiled to myself. How is he even real? Twenty-five years old, still young, but basically dead and has never lived. Not that sex gives life a meaning, but all he ever knew were his father's ways and war. Kind of sad, really. His only love destroyed before it even began and 'no time' for a new one to begin. No wonder he is the way he is, he never knew pleasure (again, not reffering strictly to sex) and fun in life.
"Any other work for me today, boss?" I asked, my spirits down and not feeling like teasing anymore.
"No, rest today. Tomorrow, however, I will need you to fake an attack on the eastern border of our kingdom, shoot some arrows at the guards, without killing them, possibly, and then get out of there unnoticed." He said in his usual voice.
"Fake an attack, fight the guards but remain unnoticed?" I asked with incredulity. "How in the name of the goddesses am I supposed to do that?"
"You've already proven yourself to be resourceful and cunning enough to succeed." He said, a small smile playing on his lips, making me think he actually liked my last night's shenanigans and I smiled back.
"About last night, …" he begun then carefully, "it was a mistake and it shall not happen again."
I looked at him, genuinely confused. "Um, ok. I promise not to pull down the king's pants ever again."
"What?" he asked, just as confused as I am. "No, I am talking about the events that occurred later on."
"Oh, me getting lost and almost freezing to death? Don't worry, I don't want that to happen either." I said with a smile. "By the way, how did I get home?"
"You don't remember?" He asked in his usual demeanour, but was that disappointment I registered in there somewhere?
"No. The last thing I remember is cold." I shrugged.
"Well, I brought you back."
"You did?" I asked baffled, "I thought for sure you would've let me die last night."
"You had the crown." He replied swiftly and left my room.
Weird. I guess I started to bore the royal highness.
Anyway, what am I supposed to do with myself today?