Friday 13th May (2016)
Once again Mr Unreliable (Mr Travis) was off ill, leaving Mr Carter to do our supply lesson. Lucky for me, I fancy the out of him so I guess it's more of a benefit for me.
I walked in late with Ryan, to stir the pot after me and the girls decided I should tease him a little. As soon as he saw me walk in after Ryan his face dropped,
"What makes you two so late huh?" His tone tense.
"Sorry Sir, I don't kiss and tell." Ryan aggravated Mr Carter even more.
"Don't even joke Ryan. Give an actual reason..." He put sternly.
"Okay, we didn't hear the bell and we were on the other side of school." Ryan sighed.
"Oh yeah guys, real original excuse... sit down." He glared at Ryan for a second before his eyes found mine and he glared at me aswell before his face softened with guilt.
I sat down in front of his desk and got my book out, staying silent so I wouldn't annoy him anymore. Without a word and without looking at me, he handed me a calculator before sighing as he said,
"I figured you wouldn't have one Philippa." He said still not looking at me.
"I'm not charity." I said quietly, scared as to how he'll respond.
Yet he said nothing, and instead lifted his head out of his computer, staring at me with a blank face.
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As the most awkward lesson came to an end, I put the calculator in my pencil case and packed away.
"Miss Taylor, outside please. Now." He shouted.
I strutted outside and stood against the wall, waiting for him to come out and say whatever he had to say. But he didn't.
Then I saw the rest of the class come out, laughing at me as they said 'good luck Philippa', oh god what was he going to say.
I headed into the classroom, but just before my hand reached the door handle, I saw Ryan still stood in the classroom. He had his back to me but I could see Mr Carter glaring at him and somewhat shouting at him.
As Ryan swung the door open and stormed past me, Mr Carter invited me in.
"Philippa, you have something that's mine." He confused me to a point beyond belief, but I soon realised he was talking about his calculator.
"Oh god... I didn't even realise I'm so sorry, I must have just forgot and put it in my bag." I stuttered as I ruffled around my bag frantically trying to find his calculator.
I passed it over with a sympathetic look as he took it from my hand and walked over to the door, closing it.
"Are you okay? You've been off all lesson, you've barely said a word." He asked, seeming concerned
"I'm fine. Even if I wasn't, I wouldn't ever spill my guts to you. You're only my teacher, not my counsellor." I spat back, becoming defensive.
"Teacher? Is that it? I thought we both knew that I was more than just a teacher?" He questioned, becoming more defensive.
"Yeah, I know you're checking in because it's protocol, but you really don't have to. I know you don't care, you have no loyalties to me whatsoever." I said back, defending myself.
He walked forward and grabbed my shoulders, lowering his head to be level with mine.
"Taylor come onn... I've told you more than enough about stuff to get me in trouble. You know we have more than just teaching in common. It's me, you know, stop having your guard up and let me in." He softened his voice and smiled.
"I know we have more than just that in common, which is why I have a wall up I guess. I don't want you to not like me anymore, you know, I like what we've got and I feel like if I tell you what's wrong it might ruin things if you get me..." I looked at the floor as I replied, nervous to what his reply will be.
"Philippa, my opinion of you will never change, I know you and I know your family. What me and you have is special and I wouldn't let anything ruin that, you know you're my favourite student right?" He winked at me after reassuring me.
It went silent for a couple seconds before his eyes flickered between my eyes and my lips. I imitated his actions involuntarily before his hand on my shoulder moved up to cup my face in his hand.
A look of realisation came across his face, and like a lightbulb moment he stepped away and took his hand off my face.
"We can't Taylor, me and you, not because I don't want to but I have too much to lose and you have big exams coming up." He looked guilty but also disappointed. I knew he wanted it.
"Just because we can't doesn't mean we shouldn't... But no your right, I know you have a lot to lose, so let's just carry on as we are and forget about this..." I somewhat agreed with him, still letting him know what I want.
"I don't want to forget, I just can't get into this. I know I said it was my Mrs that's the problem, but it's not. It's you."
"So we both want eachother but we can't have eachother...." I said before the head of maths popped his head in the door.
"Mick, meeting downstairs in 10 don't forget... Hi Philippa." The man said, having no idea what's just happened.
"Yep okay, Philippa I want questions 1 to 15 done for Monday. I'll be down soon Simon." Mr Carter acted quickly and grabbed some sheets off his desk to give me as 'homework'.
As 'Simon' walked away, Mr Carter turned on his heel and looked straight at me.
"And that, Miss Taylor, is why we can't do this. Look at the job i'm in, do you know what would happen?" He said proving to me that he too much going on to fool around.
"Of course I know what would happen Sir, and I would never do anything that would get you in trouble. But there's no harm in carrying on as we are now, we're not breaking any rules." I sympathised with a flirty tone.
"Okay, we'll carry on as we are. But Taylor, call me Michael when we're not in lessons okay?" He laughed it off, and winked at me.
"Alright Mick, i'll see you Monday with my 'homework'" I sighed as I walked out and looked back to give him one last look.
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Okay I guess from now on, the girls can not know. This stays between me and Mick. As far as the girls, I still just have a crush, and that's how it's going to stay.